Morning Lesson August 10, 2021, Transcription
Annulment as a Preparation for Ibur [Impregnation], #11
1. Rav’s Introduction: We have many more details that we need to collect in order to reach annulment and to be called an embryo, but for now I think that we need to try and see that we are not afraid of annulment. We are talking about it as if everything is okay, as if everything is normal, and happening, and will happen. Let’s try to check ourselves to see if we are, in fact, ready for annulment and ready to penetrate to enter the state. It is death from everything that we have. Everything was received in the vessels of reception, and now we don't accept it and we don't want it. We want to live above it. This is considered above reason. Let us examine together everything we have spoken about until now. The principle that I am aware, that I annul myself completely to be under His rule, for the upper one to do everything He thinks is correct and good, and that I will happily accept His dominance over me, with everything that I can, with all of my strength, I will try to assist Him. To the extent that I discover the resistance towards the actions of the upper one, these are really signals of where I need to completely annul myself. These are the months of conception. If I complete this, and there won't be anything in me that needs to awaken towards annulment, then I reach the action of birth. Let's read. These excerpts will bring us to all the correct matters.
Excerpt 11 (03:43) Twice
2. R. (06:03) WSQ: How do I feel throughout the day, today and every day, that I am more connected to the friends, coming closer to them as a result of my spiritual process? Is it clear to me what the Creator does? How can I check my spiritual advancement from coming closer to the group? To what extent do I incorporate more and more into the group rather than measuring or examining my own personal emotions towards the Creator or toward spirituality? What are the signals that I can say I have advanced through connecting to the friends, that I have taken another step forward until we become as one man in one heart? Then we begin to reveal the Creator. So how do I examine myself?
Let's say now, this morning or evening, wherever you are on the planet, how can I say where I am now in comparison to the group? Have I advanced since yesterday? Am I connected to them, to be as one body that is ready to be born? In fact, every single day we need to examine ourselves to see if we are coming closer to being born. We are far from this, of course, but we can still speak about where I feel the steps of being in this process and what discernments I can examine and measure in the group to determine this.
3. R. WSQ: (14:11) How can we measure the extent that we are distant from connection and, to that extent, distant from connection with the Creator? How can I check the extent of how distant I have become? According to what data do I see how close I have come in the group and also towards the Creator?
4. R. WSQ: (15:28) It is written ‘in my people I dwell’. To the extent that I feel in their connection in the group, which I depict regardless of if they discover this or not, like Rabbi Yossi ben Kisma, to the extent that I find their connection and their desire for the goal and I adhere to them in that same point towards the goal, to that extent I feel that I am coming closer to the Creator. There I am directed to Him and am connected to Him. This is why Rabbi Yossi ben Kisma didn't want to leave his ten, his small group, specifically because by that he was able to come closer and to direct himself towards the Creator. How do I check this?
5. R. (18:41) Do I understand that if I want to take spiritual action, I must first incorporate myself in the group, to annul myself towards them, and together with them and with the force that I get from them, to do a spiritual action, a prayer to the Creator, an act of bestowal? Is that how I act? Everything depends on the group and through them I see how I can do an act of annulment. This is considered that we are gradually building this concept of the embryo. Each one annuls themselves towards the others and all in all between us, there is a single desire, a single body that begins to be similar to the Creator to a certain extent. At least it can exist within him in a way without disturbance.
Excerpt 12 (20:17)
6. R. (21:52) In corporeality, we measure who we are in comparison to the others, to what extent am I more than they are: look how he is working, look how he is doing something, take an example from him, be like him. Meaning that I will be even greater. But not in spirituality. Yes, you do need to be greater than the friends, but this greatness is measured to the extent that we are helping more, being included more, supporting them more. This is why the examination is the opposite. It is considered that ‘I see an upside-down world,’ that each one is able to annul his ego and to support the group more and by this he advances. This is why we go back to the example of Rabbi Yosef Ben Kisma who says, ‘I'm not leaving my students because specifically with them I am connected in such a way that I can advance.’ It doesn't matter that he was the greatest of the generation and knowing he was already in adhesion with the Creator to a certain extent. He must not let go of his only means of advancing towards the Creator. If I can do that it is only by being connected to them even more, supporting them even more, and by that I will see my own advancement.
7. S. (23:54) Do I always need to check these two opposite feelings, the lack of desire and above it that the friends are great, when I annul myself?
R. Yes, it is correct. You always need to see where you are in corporeality and in spirituality. I would measure myself to the extent I am greater or more understanding or more powerful in comparison to my friends compared to yesterday but there are different discernments in spirituality. To what extent do I annul myself more, to what extent do I help everyone, and don't think of myself but only of them? So, if today I see that when I start my spiritual work in the morning and I think only of myself and that I am without any strength or desire, or think where I am in comparison to them, if I start from there that is a good sign that the Creator is giving me a place to work and we need to be grateful to Him for that.
How do I arrange myself towards the friends, not towards the Creator? I do that only by arranging myself correctly towards the friends and by that I am doing it towards the Creator. What needs to be done and where am I in comparison to them? What extent do I support them? To what extent am I joyful for their success? He writes here about the zeros before me or the zeros after me. How do I measure myself in comparison to the friends because in accordance with that, in a precise manner through that same action, I place myself toward the Creator. This is why we first of all need to reach a state that I check myself, that I see that I am again not placed correctly with respect to the friends, I have no interest in them, I am distant from them, I barely think of them. When do I remember about them? I don’t feel them as close, I have no emotion, no understanding, no interest. This is where we start from and this is a good sign. I am grateful to the Creator that I at least feel that, and then I have a place to work. That is the field blessed by the Creator. I begin to work and to advance upon the new conditions.
8. S. (27:39) Is there a limit to the extent a person can feel the greatness of their friends?
R. The limit of the greatness of the friends in my eyes is infinite in comparison to an absolute zero, which is me. Absolute annulment toward the group is a sign that you are truly entering spirituality in a correct form. You have a pattern, a system, that you can implement there and you can't do it any other way. When you wake up in the morning and you are blurry, and you don't know where you are or how to adjust yourself, to correctly calibrate yourself to your own qualities, it is only the group. Only the group. There is nothing else. Who are they and what is this work? In fact, only through our attitude to the group is there a possibility to stabilize ourselves correctly. Then you see where you are and that you have the stages in front of you. You can take another step and another step and suddenly you see how it all connects, how it all assembles, and that you start to flow with all the wisdom of Kabbalah. It all begins by placing yourself in the group, with the feeling of the group, and the attitude towards the Creator. This is most certainly the only correct way to calibrate oneself toward spirituality.
9. S. (30:23) How do we check the zeros in the work?
R. Don't start measuring how many zeros that you have in comparison to the friends. You don't yet have the possibility to examine, to measure which friends am I a zero, or two, or three, or yesterday it was one zero, but today it is two zeros. We don’t yet have this mechanism, a feeling of measurement. It needs to be measured in our relationship and remain that way in our records. This is something that is very important, but not yet not now. Don't think it is distant or far away, but these are practical, spiritual actions that we will soon have. It is good that you asked.
S. Even if I say that I wish to be a bigger zero, to bestow to the friends more today than yesterday, can I measure this?
R. You cannot take any measurements here. If, with all of you might, all of your heart, and all of your will, it will definitely be more than yesterday because daily your desire to receive is increased. When we pass the Ibur where we annul ourselves completely, we will reach actions that we will be able to measure, but not for the time being. We will measure according to the extent of the annulment, which is called Tzimtzum, restriction. We will start measuring our spiritual development specifically on that same portion of the Aviut, the coarseness of the will to receive. Don't run to the study of TES, or something like that. First, see where we stabilize all of these measurements, and where we live with this entire method in our will to receive.
S. How can I understand that I am willing to cancel myself and be a zero?
R. Try to do everything you can with the friends. Through actions and all kinds of little things. I don't know what to tell you. For example, yesterday I didn't feel well and I told the friends that most likely I wouldn’t make it to the meeting during the day, but later I saw I had no choice. I saw that if they had the meeting without me, I was canceling some quality in the ten. So, I then cancelled myself and connected to them. We are given simple opportunities to do things in our lives. You don't need to go to all kinds of degrees and levels of Tzimtzum, restriction, Masach, returning light. No. For the time being we connect all these simple actions aimed at the connection between us and the Creator, and later we can start measuring such ways. That is, it, that is it. There is nothing other than this.
10. S. (35:14) Is not looking at the qualities of the friend’s annulment?
R. Of course, I don't look at the qualities of the friends. I immediately see all of the negative qualities in each and every one. Then I need to say that I have eyes but I can't see that anything negative that I see in them is because that negative is in me. This is what Rabash writes for us in his articles and this is what I need to see because they are an example for me, a frame of reference. To the extent that I see negative things in everyone, to that extent I see these things in the Creator. But it's still not clear to me. I try above reason later on and see them as good things because I say that ‘he who flaws does this from his own flaws’, so I guess all of these things are in me and that the friends are complete and corrected. If I see anything in them that is not as it should be it only shows me that I have such qualities that I need to correct until I will see them in a good and positive light. This needs to be clear. This is what we learn from Rabash.
11. S. (37:44) I heard from you that it is important to learn how not to use one's qualities but the energy of the ten in my inner work. How do I take myself from one state to another?
R. Annulment is the first action we are learning about in the spiritual work because we have a desire, an egoistic desire, an egoistic force, that we need to annul, to cancel it. I have no way of annulling it unless I find a way to come closer to the friends and enter the force of the Creator that exists between them and gradually cleanse myself. This is considered ‘entering the Mikvah,’ the ritual bath, the water that cleanses me and purifies me of all of the waste. This is how we correct ourselves. Everything is in the connection between us. The only thing we need to do is to penetrate the connection more and more and to see that the one unique and unified force, which is the Creator, works on everyone from there.
12. S. (39:40) Are there more efforts that I can measure myself other than to see the friends as great and how much I am concerned about them?
R. There are many more things but you should do what we are saying and everything will be fine. Do what we are learning. You have to try and practically, practically, take daily steps because what we are learning about in our mind, in all of the wisdom, is not important. The important thing is how we change ourselves in practice, how we measure ourselves, and criticize oneself and look at others as well.
13. S. (41:12) How can I check that I exist in my 10? How do we become aware of this deficiency?
R. I exist in the ten to the extent that I annul myself towards the 10. There is no other way to check. To the extent that I make myself a zero, I make myself a one. Remember this article by Rabash. Make yourself into two zeros and annul yourself even more, and you will see how you are even more present and more connected to the ten only in this way. If you are not annulling yourself, you are not spiritually connected to the ten and disconnected from them.
14. S. (42:21) Rabash writes, ‘if my friend is one and I'm a zero, I receive ten times more’. It sounds like I'm convincing my ego that it is worthwhile to annul.
R. It is correct for the time being to tell your ego that it is worthwhile for it to annul itself to receive from the friends. When you enter a certain place to study, you understand that there are great people there and you have to annul yourself in order to receive from them and in this way you grow. It is the same thing here. If you want to receive nourishment from the Creator, you have to annul yourself towards the friends. The Creator passes everything that you need to you and this is all attained through your annulment to the friends.
15. S. (43:38) Can I examine my advancement by seeing less flaws in the friends than I saw yesterday?
R. Maybe yes or no. When I get up in the morning I have no thoughts about them, I think nothing good about them, they exist like a wall somewhere and gradually when I awaken to the spiritual work, the goal and the means for attaining the spiritual goal then I begin to recuperate and recover according to the greatness of the goal I ascribe more importance to them. It's not that first thing in the morning I have something for them, I need to arrange myself in this way. No instrument or machine can begin to work just like that and we are a machine, we need to arrange ourselves, to calibrate ourselves to work properly.
16. S. (45:11) We are talking a lot about measuring ourselves. What do we measure again is this against our past compared to our future?
R. We measure ourselves against our ego that I need to try and annul myself to the friends so they would be great and important in my eyes, strong that I need to calibrate myself to them. Convincing myself again and again every day that this should be as new in my eyes that I am small and they are great and only if I attached myself to them as a little one will I advance and other things like that according to Rabash’s advice.
17. S. (46:33) You spoke about the fear before annulment reminding of corporeal death, does this have to do with spiritual suicide?
R. I don't know what it means to put yourself to death spiritually since we have no spiritual desire as we are building the spiritual desire on top of the corporeal desire, if the reforming light departs from us, the upper light, we fall once again to our desire to receive it doesn't matter where we are whichever degree, we are in. So, there is no putting one to death like in corporeality. It's not in our power to do this, we need to try each time to rise from degree to degree.
18. S. (47:43) Previous restriction is an action and annulment are an attitude. Can you tell me a little more difference between these two?
R. I can't but what you're saying is correct, restriction is relative to my desire and annulment is relative to my actions more correctly but the direction is the same.
19. S. (48:30) Each morning I wake up I need to calibrate myself with my attitude toward the friends in the connection between them, and I look at myself and I see that I may not wake up like a zombie and I do some corporeal actions, and I crash in my chair and somehow, I awaken towards the friends. The students of Rabbi Shimon, they were going with hatred one towards the other. How to bring ourselves in the short time before the lesson to bring herself to the state where you will have a complete lack of indifference?
R. You must feel yourself responsible for the rest of the 10 and you must now direct them toward the Creator that you are a seemingly the head of the group and then you are in charge of caring for them and arranging them that you have to bring them to adhesion with the Creator and your success depends on the success of this work. That is why you begin to be concerned with how to arrange those things, since there is no head of the group in the group, each one is his own head because each one is incorporated in everyone else. You can't just come like a log and sit among the friends to be connected to them, you have to bring yourself to them already with a certain degree of sensitivity to connect with them, why are you coming there? Try to do this.
20. S. (50:44) There are moments where I can't cancel myself and sometimes, I also have responses in the 10s, ones that I later regret, that I can't cancel myself. What is this state? Am I still small, am I still young that I don't have this ability?
R. You don't want to kill them just yet.
S. Sometimes I do.
R. Okay, then you are on the right path.
21. S. (51:37) If I annul, should I feel more in my ego toward that effort or am I supposed to feel nothing?
R. If I annul, I can't feel my ego, I don't feel anything, I feel the environment because this is the meaning of the word annulment, that I cancel myself in them and I become an embryo because of these exercises.
22. S. (52:19) You describe the state of Rabbi Yossi, how he saw in his 10 a place for advancement, what is one to do if one doesn't see a place of advancement?
R. You have to cancel yourself toward them and then you advance, you have to look for their greatness. We judge according to our own faults and we can't see the greatness, you have to annul before them and this is how you advance towards the Creator.
23. S. (53:13) We asked for the friends and when the friend sees it, it gives a lot of strength. Is there an active overcoming that the friends can't see, does this have the same weight?
R. As much as a person tries and exerts this is the correct action.
24. S. (53:43) In the preparation of a lesson when you're still blurry, how do you become the head for everyone?
R. This is what is in front of him, that he's not able to think about it doesn't matter but this is the goal.
S. Even though he is in a state?
R. Each one has to act as the head of the group.
S. Now he is in a state of blurriness, the goal is to care for the whole ten but he is the opposite of that so how to transfer between the states, how to reach this?
R. He should annul himself; he should sit down and listen and get incorporated as much as possible with patience to enter until he opens his eyes and his heart, and this is how he connects. I saw Rabash coming from such states, from the depth as it is written, ‘I called on you oh Lord’. I see how he came to the lesson, that it's 2 a.m. and he's in a state where he can't even see what's happening around him. Slowly. You think that I come here, I'm up, I'm already alert and a hero, even though I know I have to be like that, according to that one receives all kinds of burdens of the heart.
S. If the lesson advances and we still don't wake up?
R. You keep going, you ask and you pray to the Creator if possible. If not, at least belong to the flow of the lesson with the friends as much as possible and gradually there are such states where a person leaves the lesson almost the same way he comes into the lesson, and this way we acquire the greater and greater coarseness. It is possible that after a day or two that only then, you begin to arrange and realize it properly towards society and the Creator.
25. S. (57:00) Can we say that the desire of Rabbi Yossi wanting to advance by adhering to his students is that an egoistic desire and where can we see bestowing in this action?
R. Because you can advance to the Creator by canceling towards the society, that he doesn't let go of them, rather he advances to them, with them, what could be the question here. What is wrong about this action? To the extent that he annuls himself to the students and the students can be great or small, it doesn't matter, it all depends on the extent to which he invests effort in order to annul himself toward them. When he begins to annul himself to them, something special is happening here, he begins to feel that he has no problem with those students who are his students, that they are small, he has a problem with the Creator, with his nature relative to the Creator’s nature. His students, this little group is not important, this is only the adapter. Then if they can be there between him and the Creator as a bridge then he will certainly not let go of them.
S. Can you say that the world is created for me and I serve my maker?
R. Let’s say.
26. S. (59:24) I only meet with my friends on the phone, how can I create the practical areas where I can annul myself in this condition?
R. Of course we have an emotional connection with the friends over distance and if you were sitting next to him would that make a difference? If I'm sitting next to the friends, as is written in his Letter 8, “the outstretched land with many miles”, somehow it hinders his connection to them? No. The feelings, the spiritual healing connects us above all of the distances and I don't understand your questions at all as there are people who have never seen each other in person and they are in the 10. Soon the whole world will be informing such mutual connections as you will see on the TV screen and mobile phones that each one is in contact with the 10s and it is not going to interfere with a connection. I see how it is going to materialize. I promise that this is how it will be: no one will say where are my friends? That I need to feel their flesh, or how I will smell them. Why do I need to see them as even their faces? For now, we need this form of visual connection but soon you won't even need that.
27. S. (01:02:18) If a friend raises my importance and he truly wants goodness for me but I resist it, can't accept it. What do I do?
R. You try to make yourself even smaller so his behavior will not put you off.
S. Do I need to say to myself that the connection with the Creator is more important than what I see in the friend?
R. You can say that for now but later you have to come to a state where you won't see any strange or negative behavior in him.
S. Is subjugation the main and primary action in our spiritual work and a foundation?
R. Yes.
S. Can we say it is equal to be subjugated to your surroundings?
R. Yes. The first action is subjugation. By that you connect.
Excerpt 13 (01:03:58) Twice
28. S. (01:06:00) What does it mean taste in the work?
R. It means that I am impressed each and every moment because who am I working for.
29. S. (01:06:30) All of our thoughts and sensations are given by the Creator so why is it shameful because even when I ask, I raised a condition to give me something and take something else instead?
R. The fact that we are setting conditions for the Creator, that we ask for the strength of heart and mind to do the work that He places before us is not considered insolence because I'm asking for the ability to do the work for His sake. That's why it is not considered insolence, if my scrutiny should be what do I need in each and every state in order to do everything in that state in order to bestow.
30. S. (01:07:32) I can't understand what the Creator is doing. I just need to agree without understanding.
R. Yes and no, but that is not the condition that you understand what you have to do. Meaning if it is clear to you, what it means to perform a certain action in the 10 where relative to the Creator you can do nothing it is only expressed relative toward the 10. If you are working in order to tie them together, to connect them more and more then you are doing the work for him so that he will be able to be revealed there. Directly toward the Creator you can't do anything because He doesn't have the deficiency. Our work is only in the 10 so if you arrange yourself in this way it is called “from the love of people to the love of the Creator”, meaning that we are arranging the 10 correctly in order to create a place for the Creator to be revealed. You can't work directly towards Him because He needs nothing, He needs a vessel and a connection between the lower ones where He can be revealed and bestow to them.
S. In the 10, there are many things that the friends are doing and not able to understand. What does it mean when I have an attitude towards this?
R. Each one judges according to his own flaws maybe you don't understand yet but it doesn't mean maybe you need to stop, and investigate, you need to do whatever you can do with your actions, don't look at them since you can't understand it.
31. S. (01:09:44) To be angry with the Creator is this insolence?
R. It is stupidity, folly, foolishness. A person is mad at the Creator for what is happening in the world, the fact that he doesn't understand what is happening in the world, since the whole world is a result of the action of the Creator that the whole world exists inside in the Creator. If a person fails to understand this and gets mad about it, this just says that he is a fool and he doesn't understand or feel how the Creator is advancing in the world in the best possible way, or the general correction. To be mad at the Creator, there's no reason to be mad. If anything, we have to relate ourselves to that same process of creation.
32. S. (01:11:20) How does the sense of annulment connect to the sensation of love we have to come to?
R. Annulment we come to various feelings that belong to mutual bestowing, I can't feel the other before I annul myself.
33. S. (01:12:02) When the Kabbalists say to give me the strength to love the Creator, do they mean the friends and the group or directly the upper force?
R. The prayer goes directly to the upper force but goes through the group and the Creator accepts it from the group where certainly the person who activates it is the activator. Rabash writes about this, that the whole group is in the action even though they don't understand or know or participate in it; this is how a person activates himself through the 10. But because he has a connection with the 10, he works in this way through them to the Creator as there is no other way to connect to the Creator it is a Partzuf. to the extent that each one of us is in the state of Malchut, he can then activate himself as Malchut to Keter and so he does this through the whole 10.
Excerpt 14 (01:13:42)
34. R. (01:14:41) Regardless of my state, if I am willing to remain in this state, I know what my work and I is know how to do this, how to work and how to bestow to the Creator. If I am willing to remain this way permanently, forever, this means that I have connection with the Creator even in this state. I do not desire for more I simply don't, this is a matter of limitation. There is no measure to the height of the spiritual attainment or the depth of connection, it all depends on how much a person tries to feel himself as connected to the upper one. In this way the baby in his mother's arms who embraces her and she embraces him, this is not connection, he doesn't want to remain like that for eternity and her as well. Why demand more as this is an example that we need to see ourselves in each and every state as happy that we have a 10, that we have the Creator and even in the smallest state we can attain spirituality and completeness which depends only on us. Let's arrange ourselves like that and you can feel this, that you need nothing more than that compared to what we have. We are already in these states except we aren't and don't arrange our egoistic desire to receive in such a way that it would not interfere with our feeling of completeness. Instead, we will always seek luxuries, it all depends only on us.
Excerpt 14 again (01:17:36)
35. S. (01:18:40) What does it mean to have a measure of greatness if he is in smallness?
R. If a person wants nothing more and he brings himself to a state where he is in bestowing and he demands nothing for himself this is completeness.
Excerpt 15 (01:19:20) Twice
36. R. (01:23:14) If we are in the time of the smallness, the smallest Katnut that there is just as we are in the greatest Gadlut that we are in this, is a sign that we are truly in bestowing and we don't check how much we have from the Creator, am I happy with him or not, Therefore there has to be work during the Katnut to be joyful just as in the time of Gadlut and then accordingly we measure the level and the degree. Malchut is in restriction that has nothing in spirituality, it is empty but above it there is Tzimtzum, Masach and Ohr Hozer, restriction screen and reflected light and therefore all of the spiritual war happens above Malchut in the first 9 Sefirot in bestowing because they desire to receive is restricted and it rejects from itself benefit everything.
37. S. (01:24:42) Kabbalists, they depict the correct state for us and when we read about them and get into them to have workshops, we get all kinds of thoughts that something's wrong with me or something's wrong with the 10, should I cancel those costs as well?
R. We need to see what is happening with us and scrutinize it and ask for the corrections that I will feel myself with more wholeness even though in my vessels I feel like I'm nothing. If I want to work for the benefit of bestowing to the host and I want the host to receive something and I see that He is not paying me then I am in a complaint towards Him, why does he not pay me? It turns out that this puts me in disconnection from the Creator. We need to aim ourselves so we're back together with the group. We can come to a state where in each and every state in connection between us, we can go over anything we get from the Creator. It doesn't matter what but that we can be in gratitude, to be grateful for whatever we receive. The more that we will advance in spiritual degrees that we will feel how, according to the desire to receive, we get less and less and how we can change our attitude to the Creator as though we are receiving more.
38. S. (01:27:12) In the last excerpts, he's speaking in different terms of Katnut or Gadlut, smallness or greatness, how should we see that in the work with annulment to the 10?
R. I don't really understand you as we spoke about all of those things, smallness and greatness are measured according to the magnitude of the desire and how above it I can transform it from in order to receive to in order to bestow. That I restrict myself from measuring what I got even though I do measure as I have to, but afterwards I restrict myself and then I calibrate myself through the friends to see in what way I can bestow to the group in general and to the Creator, this is our work.
Excerpt 16 (01:28:26)
39. R. (01:30:30) We will conclude the first part of the lesson here. I am asking you to review all of these excerpts during the day and to discuss them as this is really a must without confusing each other with what you think. If it's short and to the point you can say it to their friends, do this and it will bring more connection and mutual understanding between you.