Question: Can a Hisaron become a filling? How does this happen?

Answer: A person who is created from the will to receive, can never exist solely on the basis of a Hisaron. The very nature of creation demands fulfillment. The only question is what shall I enjoy? What kind of pleasures will fill my will to receive?

I know that my Hisaron is directed toward something great, something I have not yet attained. However, this unfilled desire itself brings me a certain illumination from this “greatest” from afar because I otherwise would not have a need for it. In such a case, my Hisaron can actually become my fulfillment.

This means that I find satisfaction with this Hisaron, it suffices for me, and I desire nothing more. If I were to possess anything in addition to this Hisaron, it would no longer be a lack for the highest pleasure. Even the act of receiving fulfillment would only distance me from the goal I strive for. Therefore, I prefer to remain with the Hisaron, which itself serves as my fulfillment. I am happy simply in the fact that I desire this greatest pleasure.

Is this sufficient for attaining the goal of creation? No, it is not. This is similar to the state of bestowal for the sake of bestowal, which undoubtedly is not our ultimate goal. And yet, in this situation, I find pleasure and justification for my current state. Such a state is certainly desirable for a person in this world.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/14/26, Rabash, “What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?”

Prayer is the desire to acquire the correct Hisaron (deficiency). There are many inner discernments here.

Our entire path—from the moment we receive the point in the heart until crossing the Machsom, when we work in double and then single concealment and while committing intentional transgressions and then errors—all these states are traversed in order to form a desire, a need, for vessels of bestowal within us.

In the article “Introduction to The Study of the Ten Sefirot,” Baal HaSulam describes the state of “not for the sake of the Creator” (Lo Lishma) where I passionately desire to attain spirituality for my own sake and at the same time, I want to bestow upon the Creator.

Both these desires must exist within me simultaneously, and this state is called Lo Lishma. Consequently, by having the desire to bestow upon the Creator within me,  I feel that all my other desires are simply egoistic, for my own benefit. Existing within these two desires simultaneously allows me to see the difference between bestowal and reception.

Baal HaSulam writes that a person must realize that if they were to discover that they would receive only vessels of bestowal and absolutely nothing for oneself, such a state would not satisfy them, they are simply incapable of it. This is the true state of Lo Lishma, and from it, one comes to the state “for the sake of the Creator” (Lishma). In the book A Sages Fruit, it is stated that we must attune ourselves only toward striving to reach the state of Lishma day and night.

Our initial Hisaron, the point in the heart, signifies the state wherein “the Creator inseminates first, she gives birth to a female (Nekeva).” This primary Hisaron (Nekeva) implanted within us must be increased to its greatest possible measure in this world.

In other words, despite the earthly desires within me, which I seek to fulfill and realize, I want even more to have the desire to bestow upon the Creator. It is precisely this state that is represented by the sages’ saying: “A woman (Nekeva) who conceives first gives birth to a male (Zachar).” Zachar represents the first screen, the force of bestowal. This state may rightfully be called an infant born in spirituality.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/14/26, Rabash, “What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?”

Question: If nothing shines to me from afar, does it mean I cannot develop a need for the upper goal?

Answer: Our desire depends on several factors: an illumination from above, an awakening of the Reshimo (spiritual gene) from below, and so on. We can demand the conditions we need.

There are no problems here, because I ask the Creator for a Kli (vessel) and not for the filling itself. And even later, when “a woman will conceive and give birth to a boy,” there too I am asking for a Kli, for the desire to bestow. I do not ask: “Fill me.” I say: “Give me the possibility to bestow so that bestowal to You will serve as filling for me.”

What filling does a mother receive when she gives love and care to her child? She enjoys the very act, her bestowal to him. To the extent that the child enjoys, she enjoys. In giving to the child, the mother does not think about personal benefit; there is no self enjoyment here. We speak about this superficially, because inside maternal love there is an egoistic nature. But whatever it may be, this example is like an imprint from spirituality.

“For what do you suffer, why do you constantly think and worry about your child? We will give you a pill so that you forget him.” Will a mother agree to such a thing? Never! Because in the child lies her whole life, the source of fulfillment and joy. Therefore, when one asks for the desire to bestow, one asks precisely for it and not for something outside of it.

You cannot say: “Once I have the desire to bestow, with that, I will fill myself.” That would be bestowal for the sake of reception. Of course, the Creator will not reward such a request with an answer. But if a person has the desire to bestow even though it contains a mixture of the desire to receive, of self enjoyment, then this is already the state of Lo Lishma from which one comes to Lishma.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/14/26, Rabash, “What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?”

Question: How can one immediately understand that one is doing evil and causing harm? How can one shorten the time spent going through this process? One could remain in this delusion for years.

Answer: Let’s assume I am doing something. How can I tell if it is good or bad or if it is to my detriment or benefit? How can I shorten the time required to verify and understand? One could remain in this delusion for years, and until you realize this, you will keep circling around various paths  before finally returning to the straight one.

Comment: A person can turn to friends whom he sees as big because sometimes you can annul before them.

My Response: And what would you ask of them? Advice? It might, on the contrary, only confuse you. They might offer a thousand tips, but instead of getting help from the group, a person could become even more confused and weakened. Where does it say to do this?

Comment: We know that only a group changes a person; it shows him where he stands in relation to the goal and what is wrong with him.

My Response: Or maybe, on the contrary, it is he who is fine? But how does the group enable a person to check? By hearing different things? No, it is with its help that he realizes the greatness of the Creator, and that is all! A person gathers an unlimited supply of force from his friends, much like fuel.

For example, instead of 70 octane gasoline, they fill me with 90 octane gasoline, and then I can do everything much faster. Nothing more! The group does not give me their concepts and definitions. It gives me an awareness of the Creator’s greatness, an understanding of who I should be with in my desire to receive, within my difficulties and obstacles.

I am not going to share my personal issues with my friends (nor will they share theirs with me). I have to take only a common force from them—a pull toward the goal. I seek to ensure that the goal, which feels like it occupies only 10% of my field of vision, would capture 50%, 70%, or even 100% of it. This is exactly what I want the group to do for me.

Beyond that, how exactly am I to move toward this great and big goal is entirely my task; I do it. This is my personal individual work; no one should meddle in it. Similarly, the teacher is forbidden to interfere, otherwise you will not have the right concepts of your own, the properties that allow you to feel the Creator. Therefore, it is necessary to protect everyone’s individuality.

All else should be very open. But my personal connection with the Creator—what I clarify with Him, the kind of relationship we have—is between Him and me, while the group provides me only with common energy on the way to Him, and no more.

In addition, we can share knowledge when we study, that this should be one way and that another. But it is forbidden to share what lies within me, within my personal scrutiny.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/11/26, Rabash, “The Meaning of the Strict Prohibition to Teach Idol Worshippers the Torah”

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