Jul 8, 2026 5:31 AM -
What are ascents and descents? It is when I have done the utmost I was capable of. I tried to apply all my strength, knowledge, time, and energy. I squeezed everything I could out of myself.
At the moment I exert this effort, I am filled with self-confidence, pride, drive to move forward, and certainty that I will surely succeed. But at the very peak of my inspiration and enthusiasm, a descent suddenly befalls me.
This descent is meant to reveal to me that even at the utmost limit of my effort and inspiration, I am still very far from the goal. Each time, the more strength I exert and the harder I try to break through and move forward, seemingly succeeding and achieving something, the more I discover that I am actually drifting further and further from the goal. Each time, my state is shown to me in a truer light, and the truth is revealed to me more and more.
It turns out that, in this way, I develop two things within myself. First, the awareness that I am farther and farther from the goal. Second, the goal itself is becoming increasingly important to me. Therefore, I have no choice since it is absolutely necessary for me to attain this goal, and I understand that I am completely incapable of achieving it by my own strength. Then disappointment and despair come to me.
But I am not disappointed either in the goal itself, or in my desire to attain it. I am disappointed only in my own strength. I am fully determined to reach it, I am ready to invest all my energy for that purpose, but I simply do not know by what means it can be achieved.
Then I come to a state where I understand that I must go above reason, against human logic; that there must be some “unnatural” solution here, something above our nature. Only then is this solution, which does not belong to our nature, revealed to me.
It must come from the combination of two opposites: the importance of the goal and the lack of my own strength to attain it. Both of these poles must be present here. I see that my strength is at zero, and that there is nothing that can help me. And from above, no new possibilities are revealed to me that I could still try, do, or add.
I have completely exhausted my potential, exhausted myself, tried everything, and failed in all my attempts. There is nothing left for me. And this is a sign that I have reached a state in which I have examined all my strengths and seen that they are utterly insignificant and worth nothing. Yet with every new disappointment in myself, I received a greater desire to attain the goal. This is the meaning of ascents and descents.
Every impulse upward or downward produces two results: disappointment in one’s own strength and the importance of the goal. One versus the other. With every new descent or ascent, with every such impulse, this contradiction grows sharper and sharper and these two poles move farther and farther apart, until a person reaches a certain critical point.
Each person has their own measure they must traverse. But, as Rabash says, the hero here is only the one who has patience, who tries again and again, and does not ease the pressure. He always says: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me?” There is no other method here. One must always speak to oneself in this way. And when one sees an unsuccessful result and feels that they have not succeeded, one should say: “There is none else besides Him,” and understand that in this way He is revealing one’s true state.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 6/13/26, Rabash, “And the Lord Appeared to Him at the Oaks of Mamre”
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