Question: A man is inherently unstable in relation to a woman. Let’s say he meets a woman, but after a while, the initial attraction fades. Why does he want another, and another, and another?

Answer: This stems from the spiritual root because he constantly wants to fill and fill, but feels no novelty in the same state.

A woman, it is the opposite; she “sticks” to him because she receives 90% of her desires from him, and only 10% of her own. A man receives 90% of his own desires and 10% from the woman. This is how they exchange their desires through contact.

Of the ten Sefirot, nine are Zeir Anpin and one is Malchut. Therefore, for a woman, it is enough to attach herself to a man; with that, she receives both the desire and the fulfillment. But for a man, this is not enough; he needs constant renewal in Malchut so that new souls can enter her, giving him an opportunity to fill them. If Malchut does not renew, then he has nothing to do with her.

The same happens in our world. If a man does not feel novelty, change in a woman, or flirtation, he quickly loses interest. Psychologists explain our relationships exactly this way and try to help with their renewal.

In our time, when all of this is revealed and completely accessible, fulfillment is disappearing even more. On one hand, this is a common problem on the material level; on the other hand, it leads us toward the need to truly rise to the resolution of different problems.

I think our generation is going through exactly this. It is not just experiencing it, but moving forward. Gradually, it will give this a very simple place to fill its needs, and everything will move to a higher realm.

Question: But why does society condemn a man for adultery if this is a natural, innate impulse that comes from above?

Answer: In terms of global understanding, this comes from religion, particularly Christianity. But in all previous cultures, this was not the case.

On the other hand, we are not saying that salvation lies in total freedom: do whatever you want. We say that a person should “keep his head in the heavens,” and if they have needs, they should satisfy them in a normal, more or less socially accepted manner.

Question: But if a person is in spirituality, does that mean he must have one “spiritual” woman?

Answer: No, that could be even worse. He undergoes all kinds of inner upheavals and changes, and anything can happen in those states.

But that is not the main point; this is not how we evaluate a person. We evaluate him by where his head is, what his goal in life is, not by how he handles his animalistic needs.

This is the fundamental difference between a man and a woman. A woman needs only her man; she must know: he is mine. In principle, this is embedded in her by nature. This is how it descends to us from Zeir Anpin and Malchut of Atzilut.

But a man has no particular attachment here. If he does, then it is for the family, his own place, children, and a household, but this, so to speak, is general; it is not aimed specifically at a woman. This also comes from the higher structure of ZON of Atzilut.

Comment: But initially, at the first contact, a man behaves simply like a Don Juan. And then women always get offended: why are men such scoundrels?

My Response: We see this also among animals. There is nothing different here. In the animal world, the male is very beautiful. Look at lions, peacocks, and swans! They are made that way precisely to attract the female, to bring her into contact, to subjugate her. That is why the male needs such external attributes.

And here lies a contradiction, because a woman, in principle, does not need these external attributes at all. She does not see external beauty in a man; it does not interest her; she simply does not notice it.

On the contrary, she may like a man with a bit of a belly rather than some “Hercules.” She has a different perspective. She looks at a man from the standpoint of genetics; she sees in him a potential father, husband, provider; she evaluates him by completely different criteria than those by which a man wants to present himself.

All of this comes from spiritual roots.
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From KabTV’s “I Got A Call. Male betrayal” 8/28/10

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Question: When people ask you questions, do you listen to the words or do you sense the person’s inner impulses?

Answer: The thing is that I do not perceive a question as sound. First, I must draw a picture of the person asking the question within myself; then I must transform this picture into a general picture, a general image (not the specific one they are asking me about), and only then compare it with the true existing picture.

After all, a person does not ask quite correctly. It is possible that he does not understand the state he is asking about, he imagines it incorrectly. Then I must reveal an even deeper picture, the true one that evokes his feelings and phenomena. All these several types of sensations, layered on top of each other, must exist within me simultaneously.

Only then can I connect with the questioner and answer their question and everyone else’s.

Comment: That is a complex system!

My Response: It is not a complex system; I cannot do otherwise, what kind of answer would it be? Flat, single-screen. And there must be four screens, like in Windows, one behind another, from the inner screen where the light, the upper force, depicts states for a person, to the outer one, which he is able to feel, and to an even more external one, which he conveys supposedly in words.

I have to feel all this; otherwise, the answer is not an answer. It will be either at the level of external, earthly psychology or some sort of semi-mysticism, something not discussed.

Question: If you put different people in the same studio, dress them the same way, and they all ask the same question, would you answer each of them differently?

Answer: No. Even if several people ask the same question, I think that it practically does not depend on the person. I try to bring the question to a general level and by no means leave it on the private level.

In principle, what private questions can there be? They are all the same. Everyone goes through the same states that differ only slightly in those internal sensations that we cannot compare with each other. As I feel red, warm, bitter, and sweet, so do you, but we cannot compare how. We only conventionally describe the same impressions with the same words. So, I do not think we need to get into these discussions.

The Book of Zohar says that this is a very profound study of how we sense, understand, and adapt something within ourselves. After all, each of us is a very complex system, spread across the entire universe, across all the worlds. So to speak of private and general, at least, not now. This belongs to the level of The Book of Zohar, not to other Kabbalistic books.
[352558]
From KabTV’s “I Got A Call. Answer to Any Question” 9/12/10

When striving toward spirituality, one must always strive for the destination and not remain stagnant, trapped by one’s own desire, and unsuccessfully fighting it. A person advances when his heart and mind are in the desired state.

I am not deluded by this, but I am looking forward. I may not have reached the goal yet, but I do not sink into my present desires and qualities that grab me by the legs and try to stop me. And at the same time, I do not drift in the clouds, in an illusion of the spiritual world, until it becomes my reality. This is the proper orientation.

Every moment is an opportunity to make an effort on the path toward bestowal—the goal.

When I take a step, I feel as if I have already reached the goal, and then the work becomes the reward for me.
Taking obstacles into account, I rise above them and enjoy the fact that I am creating the quality of bestowal above knowledge. The picture of the spiritual world is formed out of my desires, when the force of bestowal begins to give them shape, the contours of my soul.
[4700]

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Question: Why do we have certain boundaries in life? If a person crosses them people think he is crazy.

For example, small children are allowed to suddenly scream in public, and it is perceived as normal. But if an adult does this on a subway, then the people around him will say that he is sick.

Answer: The fact is that a small person has great desires, but he has not learned how to work with them correctly, to direct them to a goal, to hold them within certain boundaries in order to achieve some inner balance.

However we think that a grown person naturally has to have this inner balance and harmony.

A child does not have it since he exists under the influence of various forces that develop him. Hence, at times he jumps, or runs, or screams, or repeats the same thing over and over. He is thrown from one side to another. This is normal. This is called growing pains.

The same thing happens in Kabbalah. When a person begins to study Kabbalah, he can be tossed about. We look at it as a completely normal thing. Suddenly he falls into depression, and the next moment he feels good and laughs. After that he rushes into knowledge, then toward sensations, and so forth.

These are all growing pains and they are expected. Hence, we welcome and understand them and try to be loyal to each other, although this may seem not quite normal in a different place. However, here a person sometimes can do some unusual, original actions, but we look at them as normal because we look at him as a developing child.

In our framework, we accept it when a person sleeps during a lesson, skips a lesson, or suddenly becomes angry at everyone, yells at people, and calms down afterward. It means he exists under various developing forces, and hence this is his reaction.

At the same time, outside it is considered impossible for an adult person. There everyone has to be balanced, understanding, and in harmony.

Thus, there is no problem when people exist under the influence of various stressful impacts from above. The greater the number and the more frequent they are, the faster the person is able to advance because from above he is not given more than he is able to realize.

However, if there is a desire to advance him, but he does not use this opportunity then this opportunity is taken away, and he is given an opportunity in some different form, in particular in the form of suffering. Then he already takes a different path, a slower and a harder one.

Question: What does the opportunity to advance mean?

Answer: In essence, it is a realization within a group. No matter how you look at it,  practical Kabbalah is still a realization within a group.
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From KabTV’s “I Got a Call. The Framework of Life” 10/7/10

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