The transcript has been transcribed and edited from English simultaneous interpretation, thus there may be potential semantic inaccuracies within it.
Daily Morning Lesson: May 14, 2026
Part 1: Rabash. What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?. 27 (1991)
Original lesson date: 01/01/2003
Reader: Dear friends, the first part of the lesson, we're going to study a lesson from Rav in 2003. It's based on the article, “What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?” You can find it in the Rabash writings or in the study material. We have about 40 minutes to read it. Whoever finishes earlier can do a summary of the article, the main points.
Reading: (00:50) Rabash. What Is, “If a Woman Inseminates First, She Delivers a Male Child,” in the Work?
Article No. 27, 1991
Our sages said (Berachot 60), “If a woman inseminates first, she delivers a male child. If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child, as was said, ‘If a woman inseminates, she delivers a male child.’”
We should understand what this implies to us in the work, so we will know how to behave.
It is known that the work that is given to us, to observe Torah and Mitzvot [commandments/good deeds], is in order to cleanse Israel, as it is written in the essay, “Preface to the Wisdom of Kabbalah,” “It is known that ‘cleansing’ is derived from the [Hebrew] word ‘purifying.’ It is as our sages said, ‘The Mitzvot were only given for the purification of Israel.’”
Since the creatures were created with a nature of a desire to receive for oneself, since the purpose of creation is to do good to His creations, for this reason, He created in the creatures a desire to receive delight and pleasure. Since this is in disparity of form from the Creator, who is the Giver, we were given work, where we must equalize in form with the Creator, so we, too, must correct ourselves so that all that we do will be in order to bestow.
We see that there are things we do that are giving, and there are things we do that are receiving. For example, we engage in Mitzvot between man and the Creator, and Mitzvot between man and man, which are usually called “acts of bestowal.” Also, we perform acts of reception such as eating and drinking, and we were given the work of equivalence of form, meaning that both acts of bestowal and acts reception, we must perform them in order to bestow.
It is known that there is an inverse relation between Kelim [vessels] and lights. That is, there are lights that are called “male,” and there are lights that are called “female.” “Male” means wholeness, and “female” means lack, when the degree is not in wholeness with the light that it received.
There are two kinds of light: 1) the light of the purpose of creation, which is called “complete light,” 2) the light of the correction of creation, which is only a clothing for the light of the purpose of creation. This is a female, meaning incomplete, but only a means to achieve wholeness.
The first light is called “light of Hochma [wisdom]” or “light of life,” and the second light is called “light of Hassadim [mercies],” usually referred to as VAK [Vav-Kzavot (six edges)]. This means that it still lacks the first three Sefirot.
Therefore, if a person uses the female Kelim, namely vessels of reception, meaning that the person has awakened to use the vessels of reception in order to bestow, then “she delivers a male child.” That is, from this work, light of Hochma is born, a complete light, the light of life, called “male,” since this light belongs to the purpose of creation, since the Creator created the vessels of reception, called “will to receive,” for the light of the purpose of creation.
It is written, “If a woman inseminates first, she delivers a male child.” But if a person works with the vessels of bestowal, meaning only with acts of bestowal, he can work in order to bestow, for vessels of bestowal are called “male.” Then, only female light is born out of it, since light of Hassadim, which is revealed over vessels of bestowal, can engender only the light of Hassadim, called “VAK without GAR [first three],” indicating the absence of GAR. The light of Hassadim is called “clothing light,” meaning that within the light of Hassadim, the light Hochma will dress later. This is the meaning of the words “If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child.”
The Zohar says (Tazria, Item 60), “Come and see, when the Creator is with the assembly of Israel, which is Malchut, and she evokes the desire for him first, and attracts him to her with much love and yearning, Malchut is filled with the Hassadim of the male from the right side. And when the Creator evokes love and desire first, and Malchut awakens later, then everything is in the form of female, which is Malchut.”
We should understand what this tells us in the work. It is known that the creatures extend from Malchut. Hence, Malchut is called “the assembly of Israel,” and the people of Israel extend from Malchut. Therefore, The Zohar says that as the order is above, so it extends to the corporeal branches. Accordingly, we should interpret that when a person awakens to the Creator, when he wants the Creator to bring him closer to Him, meaning he wants to adhere to Him, which is called “equivalence of form,” it means that a person wants to do everything for the sake of the Creator but he cannot. Therefore, he asks the Creator to give him the strength, called “desire to bestow.”
When one yearns for this force, since he has a lack, meaning he does not have the power to do everything for the sake of the Creator, through this work he awakens to ask the Creator to give him this power. At that time, he is given from above the power of the desire to bestow, which is a second nature. This is called “she delivers a male child,” meaning a desire to bestow, called “male.” This is considered that the upper one has given the lower one the light of Hassadim, where Hesed [mercy] means bestowing.
In other words, the work of yearning, where the lower one feels its deficiency, this is called “a prayer.” That is, he asks the Creator to fulfill his deficiency. At that time, the satisfaction of the lack is called “male.” It is written, “and she evokes the desire for him first,” meaning her desire, Malchut, called “will to receive.”
In other words, her desire for him, to adhere to him, which is called “equivalence of form,” when he asks the desire to bestow, this is called Dvekut [adhesion]. This is the meaning of the words “Malchut is filled with the Hassadim of the male from the right side.” By this we can interpret “If a woman inseminates first, she delivers a male child,” meaning that the awakening came from the person.
However, this can be precisely where a person initially did not have a desire to draw near to the Creator, meaning he received the awakening from above, since there is the matter of will to receive for spirituality, meaning we can feel pleasure in observing Torah and Mitzvot. We already said in previous articles that there are three discernments to make in this pleasure of receiving reward:
1) He will be rewarded in this world and will be rewarded in the next world. That is, he observes Torah and Mitzvot because he will be rewarded, paid. In other words, he finds no taste in the things he does, but he observes Torah and Mitzvot because he will be rewarded later, so he enjoys it now.
2) He feels a good taste while observing the Mitzvot, since it illuminates for him, he enjoys serving the King, and this is his reward. He believes what he heard from books and from authors that there is pleasure in Torah and Mitzvot, and he also received some awakening from above and began to feel that there can be good taste in observing Torah and Mitzvot more than in the pleasures of this world.
3) He sees what our sages said about Dvekut: “Cling unto Him, cling unto His attributes. As He is merciful, so you are merciful.” For this reason, he awakens to work as a giver and sees that this is out of one’s hands. At that time, he begins to yearn for the Creator to give him the power to be able to do everything in order to bestow. This is considered that the person feels that he is regarded as a woman, a female, meaning immersed in self-love, and at that time he receives from above the quality of “male,” and he is rewarded with a second nature called “desire to bestow.” This is the meaning of the words “If a woman inseminates first, she delivers a male child.” That is, from above, he is given Hesed, which is male.
But “If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child.” It is written, “And when the Creator evokes love and desire first, and Malchut awakens later, then everything is in the form of female, Malchut.” Similarly, it is written, “If a woman inseminates first, what is the reason? We learned that it is because the lower world is akin to the upper world, and one is like the other.”
We should interpret this in the work, that if the man inseminates first, she delivers a female. The Creator is called “man,” and the man is called “female,” since he derives from Malchut. For this reason, if the awakening comes from above, meaning that when the Creator brings a person closer, the person begins to feel the greatness and importance of the Creator. At that time he feels that if he is connected to the Creator, he will feel pleasure when near the Creator. Then, a person begins to engage in Torah and Mitzvot because he feels some vitality in this. It follows that the whole cause that obligates him to engage in Torah and Mitzvot is the pleasure he feels now by the awakening of the “man,” meaning the Creator.
This is the meaning of “If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child.” That is, from this work, when a person works because he received an awakening from above, only a female can be born. It is known that a female in spirituality means “receiving and not bestowing.” We should interpret here in the work that then a person builds his work on the basis of receiving pleasure from this work, and this is what causes him to work.
This is called “female,” meaning that then a person works on the basis called “will to receive spirituality.” However, he does not have the strength to work in order to bestow, since his entire basis is built on the pleasure he received from above by the awakening from above. At that time, a person is born with the quality of a female, which is the desire to receive spirituality in order to receive. However, he cannot work in order to bestow, as it is written, “If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child,” meaning receiving and not giving.
Therefore, if a person is rewarded, he is shown from above that man must work in order to bestow, but he cannot work in order to bestow. For this reason, he suffers a descent because he is still unable to work on the basis of bestowal. That is, when he sees that he should work in order to bestow and not for his own sake, he suffers a descent because he sees that this is not for him.
Sometimes, this descent causes him to escape the campaign. If he is rewarded, he recovers and begins to see what it means that one must work in order to bestow. He sees that it is out of man’s hands, and then he begins to pray to the Creator to help him emerge from the control of self-love with which man was born, and asks the Creator to help him.
This is regarded as a person having to ask for the exile of the Shechina [Divinity], meaning how to work for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. This is difficult, as it extends from the governance of the nations of the world over man’s personal quality of Israel. And also, one should pray for the general public, that all of Israel will be able to work for the Kedusha [holiness], called “kingdom of heaven.” This discernment, when one works for Malchut, is called “If a woman inseminates first, she delivers a male child.” But “If a man inseminates first, she delivers a female child.”
For this reason, one should not sit and wait to receive an awakening from above. Rather, in any state one is in, he should start and awaken, so the Creator will help him.
Concerning the prayer, we should know that when a person prays to the Creator to help him, we should discern between prayer and request. A “prayer” means that a person prays the order of the prayers that our sages have arranged for us. A “request” is when a person asks privately. This is how prayer and request are interpreted.
We can explain this, since what our sages established, a person should say with his mouth. That is, even if he does not mean that the Creator will hear what he says in the phrasing of the prayer, it is still considered a prayer, since we say what they said, and to them, these were holy words. For example, after the Eighteen Prayer, a person says a prayer, “My soul shall be as dust to all.” Certainly, a person does not want the Creator to grant his prayer.
Nevertheless, a person says it in the phrasing of the prayer as a Segula [virtue/merit/remedy]. That is, as a Segula, saying “My soul shall be as dust to all” can help even for obtaining sustenance, and so forth. This is so because all the prayers that our sages established are holy names, which is a Segula for everything, meaning it helps with everything.
But the meaning of the words that a person thinks, which is according to what one thinks, he should know that these prayers are above our mind. Rather, they are all holy names. We use them as Segula, for by them we have connection with the Creator. This is why we have to say all the prayers with the mouth, since in the heart, we do not understand. Therefore, when we say this with the mouth, we have connection with what they said, since what they said was all with the holy spirit, and they are founded on the holy names.
Baal HaSulam said that although it is customary that when we want to pray for a sick person, the order is that in the Eighteen Prayer, when we say, “Heal us, Lord, and we will be healed,” it is because the general public can understand only according to the meaning of the words, but in truth, he said that we can mention the sick person, that the Creator will send him a cure, even in the blessing, “And to the slanderers,” since all the blessings in the Eighteen are holy names. This is why he said that when we say the prayers that they said, we have a connection with them, meaning with their prayers, namely connection with their intentions.
This is not so with a request. This is when a person feels what he is lacking. This is specifically in the heart, meaning that it does not matter what he says with his mouth, since “requesting” means that a person asks for what he needs, and all of man’s needs are not in the mouth, but in the heart. Therefore, it does not matter what a person says with his mouth. Rather, the Creator knows the thoughts. Hence, what is heard above is only what the heart demands and not what the mouth demands, since the mouth has no deficiency that must be satisfied.
Hence, when a person comes to pray he should prepare for the prayer. What is this preparation? It is written “Prepare for your God, Israel” (Shabbat 10). He says there that preparation is something each one does according to his understanding. We should interpret that concerning the preparation that each one does, it is in order to know what to ask, since one must know what to ask. That is, a person has to know what he needs.
This means that a person can ask for many needs, but normally, we ask for what we need the most. For example, when a person is in prison, all his concerns are about the Creator freeing him from imprisonment. Although sometimes a person has no income, and so forth, he still does not ask the Creator for income, too, although he needs it, since then he suffers most from being in prison. For this reason, a person asks for the thing he needs the most, meaning he asks about that which pains him the most.
Therefore, when a person comes to pray to the Creator to help him, he should first prepare and examine himself to see what he has and what he needs, and then he can know what to ask of the Creator to help him. It is written, “From the depths I have called upon You, Lord.” “Depth” means that a person is at the very bottom, as was said, “at the bottom of Sheol,” meaning that his lack is below and he feels that he is the lowliest of all humans.
In other words, he feels so far from Kedusha, more than everyone else, meaning that no one feels the truth, that his body has nothing to do with Kedusha. For this reason, those people, who do not see the truth of how far they are from Kedusha, can be content with their work in holiness, while he suffers from his situation.
Therefore, this person, who criticized himself and wants to see the truth, this person can say, “From the depths I have called upon You, Lord,” meaning from the bottom of the heart. This is called “a prayer from the bottom of the heart,” on the part of the receiver. That is, he examined himself and saw his fault.
However, when the person prepares himself for prayer, he must pay attention to the Giver. This is the hardest, since there is a rule that anything that depends on faith, the body does not agree to it. Since a person prays to the Creator, he must believe that the Creator “hears the prayer of every mouth,” even when the person is unworthy of the Creator granting his wishes.
This is as we say in the prayer between man and man. Normally, there should be two conditions when one asks a favor from another: 1) His friend must have what he wants, so if he asks him, he will be able to give him because he has it. 2) His friend must have a kind heart. Otherwise, his friend might have what he asks, but will not want to give it because he is not a merciful person.
Likewise, between man and the Creator, these two conditions must be met, as well, as our sages said (Hulin 7b), “Israel are holy. Some want and do not have, some have and do not want.” We should interpret this in the work. The Creator has what he wants, meaning what a person asks—that the Creator will bring him closer and give him the privilege of serving Him. In other words, a person wants the Creator to give him the desire to bestow. At that time, he believes that the Creator has the power to give man the desire to bestow.
However, the Creator does not want, since He sees that the person is still incapable of it because he still does not have a real desire for it, since he thinks that he has already prayed many times to the Creator to satisfy his wish and give him the filling, namely the desire to bestow.
But because “as the advantage of the light from within the darkness,” the person’s awakening from below is still incomplete, and the person must still labor in order to understand the great gift called “desire to bestow,” which he is asking of the Creator. This is called “He has but He does not want to give.” However, the person is considered holy because he is asking the Creator to take him as a servant of the Creator.
Sometimes, a person asks the Creator to bring him closer and give him a good taste in Torah and in prayer. Then, if he tastes sweetness in Torah and work, he will agree to serve the Creator. But to learn and pray and observe all 613 Mitzvot with all their details and precisions just like that, when he feels no taste in this? A person says he cannot do this.
Therefore, he asks the Creator to grant his wish. To the Creator, this is called “Israel are holy. Some want and do not have.” This means that the Creator wants to give to the person the flavors of Torah and Mitzvot, but “He does not have.” That is, these things do not exist in the Creator, in vessels of reception, that it is possible to give this to a person in his vessels of reception.
This is the meaning of “the Creator cannot give him,” since the Creator has no vessels of reception. Rather with the Creator, everything is in vessels of bestowal. Since a person wants the Creator to give him everything in man’s vessels of reception, since he claims that he wants to enjoy Torah and Mitzvot, and this is why he asks the Creator to satisfy his deficiency, to the Creator, this is called “He wants to give to the man what the man wants, and He wants to give because of His desire to do good to His creations. But because the person asks the Creator to give him everything in man’s vessels of reception, the Creator does not have this.” Rather, the Creator has only the desire to bestow.
For this reason, although a person cannot receive from the Creator, he is still called “holy,” since he wants to engage in Torah and Mitzvot. Hence, when a person comes to pray, he should first prepare in order to know for what to pray.
Reader: We're going to move to a lesson from 2003.
M. Laitman: (33:49) "If a Woman Inseminates First, She Gives Birth to a Male Child" in a work. It's from the “Rungs of the Ladder,” volume 5, from the articles that pertain to the Babylonian Talmud, Blessings. It’s page 11. All of our work is not on the deficiency. The deficiency exists, but rather, what will this deficiency be aimed towards? This is called the intention. The intention is the direction of my deficiency. What do I aim it to, to which goal? What do I want that will be revealed inside of the deficiency? How will this deficiency be filled? The deficiency is filled by pleasure. So what kind of pleasure do I want to appear in my deficiency? What is it that I decide that I want to enjoy from? Certainly, all of the decisions are about what to enjoy from, and nothing else. This is how we are built. But what to enjoy from? It could be that I'm bestowing, or it could be that I'm receiving. It could be that I'm in adhesion with the Creator, or that I'm disconnected from Him. And the most important thing is that I attain whatever I want. This means that it could be from pleasures that come from the depths of the Klipot, the shells, and up to the pleasures that are the most exalted in the stature of the Creator Himself. It is all about the intention of what do I want to enjoy from. My will to receive is simply like some kind of a void, an empty place, which I want to fill. You can truly liken it to a person who wants to eat, but he doesn't know what. He has no records. And then he chooses, what does he want to enjoy from in the food, maybe that way. So, all in all, we need to choose the subject. What is it that we enjoy from? To begin with, we're taught through nature, through this world, what does it mean to enjoy? From all kinds of simple, small, ordinary things. That is, the Creator created the will to receive. He put it in some place, some state, where there are all kinds of pleasures before the will to receive, which the will to receive instinctively, naturally wants them. And it makes calculations. What is preferable instead of this, or instead of that, and so on. It's calculations. This is in order to begin to develop the will to receive. So, this whole environment is built around the will to receive in these kinds of clothings that are called this world. And from this, the will to receive should start to develop. This means to find other sources of pleasure. If it will be only closed within this small environment in which it was born, and from there it suckles those pleasures, then inside of that, it will exist as a beast and it will not develop. But rather, he will end its life on the same level.
M. Laitman: (38:19) Development is possible only when the will to receive will open up for itself an entirely different environment, with entirely different pleasures, with an entirely different manner of pleasures. And then he will acquire what is called a different life, a spiritual life. This means that there is one kind of environment, and there is a second kind of environment. So, how to push the person to develop towards a second environment? He is given a desire from above, of course. The fact that a person is given from above a desire for pleasures that do not exist in his small environment in which he was born in this world, this is called a man who inseminates. The Creator is called man. He inseminates. He gives the person an awakening towards spirituality. He inseminates first. Certainly an awakening cannot come from a person just like that, but it is rather through records, through lights that shine on the records. Suddenly a person feels a desire for something which is beyond this world. And then out of the fact that the man inseminates first, the Creator gives him a deficiency. A female is born. A lack for spirituality. This is what the person feels. And then he makes all kinds of efforts to actualize, to implement this desire, to fill it. He runs here and there. How is this possible? The study, the society, all kinds of things, right? Until he finds something, until he understands, until he begins to somehow see himself working in attaining the filling. And it becomes clear to him bit by bit, it takes years, that his will to receive, even though he received it from above, it doesn't have the same character or, let's say, the form, the characteristics of what he needs for the filling. Meaning the will to receive actually exists, but it is a will to receive not for the filling that exists beyond this world. Because beyond this world, over there, the filling is different and the vessel is different. So we need to acquire both of these things. So the person begins to discover that what the Creator gave him, He didn't actually give him a desire for spirituality, even though seemingly a deficiency was born in him, a female. The Creator just gave him some kind of a raw desire for some kind of a filling that does not exist before him. This desire must exist in a totally different vessel. This desire must exist in a vessel of bestowal. The deficiency should be to fill itself with pleasures of bestowal. When a person reaches a state where what he needs is a new deficiency, not the filling, then we can certainly say that the Creator, the man, has inseminated and she gave birth to a male, to a female child. This means that after all kinds of searches, the person realizes that he doesn't lack the filling, he lacks the deficiency, the deficiency to bestow.
M. Laitman: (42:55) And when he has this deficiency to bestow, it is truly a deficiency that was born. Because just a deficiency that a person feels from the point in the heart that has awakened in him, just like that, it's a deficiency - I want to grab the whole next world or something that I imagine to myself to be the next world. This is not really called a female. We're speaking about male and female with respect to spirituality. And so, a deficiency for the forces of bestowal, the intention to bestow is called “female.” And then this female, this woman that truly demands this deficiency for vessels of bestowal, demands from the Creator to have vessels of bestowal, forces of bestowal, this is called that the “woman inseminates first,” that she demands. And then, as a result of this demand, when the woman inseminates first, then a male is born, that the person truly receives vessels of bestowal, what he's asking for. And these vessels of bestowal cannot come without the precedence of the prayer. And this prayer, Rabash says that it has to come so it will be vessels of bestowal, true vessels of bestowal, meaning praying for the collective, prayer for others. This is how the vessels of bestowal will be tested. This is how they will truly be felt in a person, that these are vessels, it's a deficiency for something that exists outside of his body. This prayer is truly called a prayer, and not anything else that existed before. This means that the prayer can only be for vessels of bestowal, true vessels of bestowal. And then, because the awakening for these vessels comes from within the person, it is called that the woman inseminates and a male child is born. Out of the fact that the person himself wants to have vessels of bestowal, the Creator does it for him and He gives him forces for it, and a vessel of bestowal is created in the person. This is simply similar to how we go from below upwards on our path. First, we have to enter Malchut, achieve the deficiency, the deficiency from Malchut to be as Keter, to be a bestower, a giver, and then certainly when we acquire the forces to reach being a giver, we reach the Keter, Malchut rises to the Keter. So the first awakening is upon the Creator. The second awakening is upon the person, and then he achieves spirituality. This is actually some kind of a summary.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (46:30) What is this matter of praying for the other, for a collective? What is it? How do you do it? What is it about?
M. Laitman: A prayer for others means all of my thoughts and my desires which are outside of me, for whatever exists outside of me. And it doesn't matter to me if it is the Creator or the whole of humanity. We certainly - only at a time, only in states that are truly very advanced towards the barrier, towards the implementation of the correct prayer - then we begin to feel that either the Creator or the whole world, it's truly the same thing. Because outside the vessels, we don't feel anything. So how can I nevertheless feel outside of my vessel that this is me, this is the Creator? So whatever is felt in the vessels of the whole world, whatever is revealed there towards me, this is actually the Creator with respect to me. If I reveal it in my vessel, it is called, in my case, this world, if I reveal it in the vessels of all the other souls, it is called the next world, the spiritual world, or the Creator.
Student: And when is the whole world included in this connection?
M. Laitman: This connection with the whole world, to the extent that you are holding a screen, that you then don't face inside of you, but you face outside of you.
Student: So every request should be for the whole world?
M. Laitman: Baal HaSulam in the book Matan Torah describes the situation as such, that the person, as he grows up, he first cares for himself, and then for his family, and then for his environment, and then for his country, and then for the whole world. Yes? He is simply describing to us a person who is big, he is big in a human sense, supposedly. If we are speaking of spirituality, then of course - just imagine that all of our understanding, as we are now grasping, imagine to yourself that all of our attainment, just like now we attain reality through five senses out of our desire - our whole spiritual attainment is also inside of our general desire called Adam HaRishon, the general soul. A part of Adam HaRishon, let's say one part of six hundred thousand. So what I attain in my part is called this world, inside of me, whatever I can absorb. And what I attain by coming out with the feeling of the external vessels, what I attain in them, this is called my external world, external to me means the spiritual world, that I exist as a soul in these vessels, in the spiritual vessels.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (49:50) How do we do it during the lesson?
M. Laitman: How do we do it during the lesson? Like we said, that if you have an initial deficiency for that, that the Creator stimulated you in such a way, then you should continue towards the true desire.
Student: So I just want it?
M. Laitman: Yes, just want it, we don't need more. A prayer, means that I want to achieve a desire, deficiency, without a deficiency, there are many discernments here. And all of our work in this entire interval from the beginning of the feeling of the point in the heart and until we cross the barrier, this whole way in a double concealment and ordinary concealment through iniquities and later on through mistakes, it is in that we need to put together within ourselves a desire, a deficiency for the vessels of bestowal. As he tells us in the “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot”, in the Preface, that what does it mean Lo Lishma? That I very much want spirituality for myself, and also to bestow to the Creator, these two things should already be together. This is called Lo Lishma, that out of the fact that I have a desire to bestow to the Creator, I feel that the rest of my desires are for myself, and then I understand the difference between them, and I exist in both of them together. He says that it should be clear to a person that if he will know that he is receiving only vessels of bestowal and he'll have nothing for himself, he won't want it, he won't be capable of something like that. This is called the true Lo Lishma, and from that we come to Lishma. And it's upon this desire that we need to truly be readied all day and all night, like he describes in the letters in the “Sages' Fruit,” that's it. So altogether, from the initial desire called the point of the heart, called Ish [man], that the Creator implanted in us, seeded in us, and from it a female was born, we need to grow this female so that this deficiency will be the maximal deficiency possible in this world. The most maximal one in this world is considered upon all the desires of this world, even though I want them, rather I want to also have the desire to bestow to the Creator. That's called the true female which inseminates, and a male is born, and the first screen is born, and this is truly called a baby that is born in spirituality, a newborn.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (53:35) What is this state? He was saying that a person receives a filling but instead he wants a deficiency. The deficiency becomes a filling for him, or they say…?
M. Laitman: Can the deficiency be a filling?
Student: No, what is this process? I mean, He gives him a filling and he wants the filling to be a deficiency?
M. Laitman: A person that was created from the desire to receive can never live from a deficiency. It's simply creation itself demands filling. The question is, what does he fill himself with? With what sort of pleasure does he fill himself? If I know that my deficiency is for the greatest possible thing, and I have yet to attain this greatest thing, but the deficiency itself brings me some form of illumination from afar from this great thing, otherwise I wouldn't have a deficiency for this thing. So this deficiency for me can be a filling. What does that mean? That I am sufficed with Him and I don't want anything else, for if I were to have something besides Him, that will no longer be a deficiency for the same thing. Even a filling that will come to me will come as a filling that will distance me from that thing that I long for. Hence I prefer to remain in deficiency, and a deficiency for this thing truly serves me as a filling. I am happy that I want it. Is this enough? It's not enough. You can imagine it as bestowing in order to bestow. Certainly this is not the goal. However, nevertheless, I have pleasure in this. I have a justification of my state in this. And it's certainly a state that is worthy of being in this world for a person.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (56:26) But if we don't have, like you said, an illumination of the greatness of this thing that I yearn for, then there's also no yearning for this deficiency. I mean, if I don't depict something great to myself that I yearn for…
M. Laitman: Correct. Certainly, our desire depends on several factors: an illumination from above, the awakening of the records from below, etc. This we can ask for. We have no problem with this. This we can ask for, we can demand this because I am demanding to have a Kli. I'm not demanding the filling from Him. Even later, when a woman who shall inseminate and give birth to a male, I'm demanding. What am I demanding? I'm demanding a Kli. I'm demanding the desire to bestow. I'm not demanding for You to fill me. Give me the possibility to bestow to You, so bestowal upon You will be my filling. In what does a mother fill herself when she gives to a child? Only in her deed, in giving him. As much as he enjoys, she enjoys. She doesn't have a pleasure for herself. Yes? She gives him. She doesn't think about it being good for her from that. We're not talking about the depth of the matter, because of course we're talking about on the beast level, and certainly within it, there's egoism, nature. But no matter what, it's an example somewhat, a certain reflection from spirituality. So you could say, so why are you suffering? Why do you need to constantly think and care about this child? I'll give you a pill that will make you forget about him a little. Well, will she agree? It's her life. That's her filling. That's her joy. Therefore, when we ask for the desire to bestow, we're asking Him. We're not asking for anything outside of Him. It's not that by the desire to bestow that I'll be able to have the desire to bestow to fill myself with something. It'll be to bestow in order to receive. Certainly, for such a request, the Creator does not answer. But certainly, when there's also the desire to bestow, and it's mixed, even though it's mixed with the desire to receive, to enjoy for himself, but it's already considered Lo Lishma, from which we come to Lishma. There are other things which I don't have words for yet, but they will come.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (59:09) How does a person know that in the preparation before a prayer or a request, how does a person scrutinize to himself the true deficiency? Because if he demands the great deficiency, which is desire for adhesion, the ideal desire, maybe it's not a strong enough desire. There are small deficiencies. How do you scrutinize the true deficiency that you should ask for?
M. Laitman: How does one scrutinize the true deficiency upon which we need to ask? Alone a person cannot scrutinize such a thing because it's impossible. It's impossible to live alone without the public, without the group, and reach a state in which I truly want to bestow. You don't have the conditions within which you can attain such a deficiency, or a deficiency for the deficiency. You don't have any such conditions. That is only in the society, gradually, when you see that you don't care about them, why do I need them? Then, oh, I'll tolerate them, nevertheless, I’ll have some kind of framework. Then you begin to see that it's more than a framework; you're given all kinds of blows, and you really have all kinds of things awakened in you, that at least move you a little - shake you. You get annoyed with them; you get angered with them. Then you start to understand that without receiving such responses and altogether such awakenings from the society, then you altogether would go back to sleep for a few more incarnations. So you start to appreciate them somewhat, then you start to see that through a friend you might understand something, feel something, that he can be an aid for you to some extent. Until you start to somewhat grasp that nevertheless there are things in him that if you were not to take them, you will not have what to receive spirituality with. That you attain spirituality specifically by beginning to incorporate from them. That in you, never could there be born or grow a deficiency in which you would be able to feel spirituality. That your vessel is in him. If you were to live in a cave in some forest somewhere, you wouldn't reach anything. You must have a society. How many? It doesn't matter - five, ten - but your Kli is in their hands. So you, accordingly to the extent in which you begin to understand this, to understand meaning to agree with this, first to hate, and then agree, and then to want, and to work on this specifically. Accordingly, you start to see how incapable you are, and you discover that you're simply not capable of connecting with anyone. That's the indication that you're not capable to connect with the Creator. It's the same thing. So now you understand that the society is simply a revelation of the Creator in this world, that cannot be revealed in any other form in this world. And He gave it to you as a map, as a dial, as a certain scale by which you can see where you are in relation to Him, a device with which you see where you are in relation to Him. Eventually, if you cannot emerge out of yourself, then what is the Creator or society or anything? It's all the same thing. Only without a society you would delude yourself, you would think that you're an angel already. And when you're in the society and you see how hated upon you is the society, how you don't want them all together, and you would give them up. What do I need them for? And many people come to you. Let's put it this way, I'll be your student, that's it, what do you need? I'll be your student, and that's it. It's very good, it's a good desire, but they don't understand that having a Rav without a society, you cannot do anything. Rav can show you the path to help, sustain you, so you don't fall like a baby, but you have to walk, and walking is your actions with the society. And Rav, let's say, it's on the side of the Creator, some kind of revelation from the side of the Creator that helps you in this world, but the vessels in order to bestow of yours are in them, in other souls of Adam HaRishon.
M. Laitman: (01:05:20) That's why, until we go through this entire process to the end, we don't reach the Machsom, the barrier. The whole matter of the exile in Egypt is our work with the society. Bestowal upon the society or bestowal to the Creator, is the same thing. Here, it's with the blows, and with Pharaoh, and with Moses, and all those things. And the work with the society is also divided precisely to those same stages where a person is building his vessel. He needs to bestow upon the society, and specifically the greatness of the Creator, and to subjugate himself before the society, towards the Creator. There's a part here in which he's a Keter who's bestowing, as Malchut is receiving, he's truly building his vessel, and he has no one else upon which to build this. Towards the Creator, it's impossible. Towards himself, it's impossible. Also towards the Rav, it's like towards the Creator. It’s only towards the society. It turns out that the society is that laboratory in which we learn and prepare ourselves in order to be truly born in spirituality. We need to certainly receive a desire to pray for an external vessel, for a vessel of bestowal.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:07:05) This means that the deficiency comes because we go through this path, and before that there's no feeling?
Student: Before there's nothing. People can scream and ask for help because they have a desire, a beastly desire for spirituality. Yes, bring me, why aren't you giving me, you gave me a deficiency, why didn't you give me, you're not filling it. The Creator gave you this deficiency, He didn't intend to fill it, to fill this deficiency. He gave you this deficiency so that upon it you will build the deficiency for spirituality. He gave you a deficiency actually not for spirituality, He gave you a deficiency to receive even more in the world that you're in, a corrupted deficiency. Through your work you draw the lights, the illuminations, what we call in Him, as we say, NHY of Atik, Dadei Behema, the surrounding light that comes from above. It doesn't matter how you call this, you are drawing the illumination which gradually builds the correct deficiency for you. But this illumination is felt in you according to the extent in which you search for the correct deficiency. Otherwise you will feel all kinds of other illuminations, just pleasures that are out there. Rather, to make them more selective, where precisely the reforming light will come. So you need to want to be reformed, to return to the good. And here, it's only a woman that will inseminate to give birth to a male, a person needs to be the one that's prior to it in his deficiency, and that's why we have a society. This will gradually be revealed. It will be revealed to us. There's no choice. We look at the externality of the Partzufim that are sitting here, and you're looking at them, and what do you have with them? These faces, the people over here. But if you were to enter inwards, you would see souls, which are your vessels, within which you can truly—these are actually your organs, your organs. The fact that our point is called the point in the heart, around it you need to build the heart, a new Kli, instead of the stony heart, a heart of flesh. For this heart of flesh will be built from you joining to yourself all the rest of the vessels. That is called, I have taken from you the stony heart, and I build for you a heart of flesh.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:10:18) What does it mean that a person is looking for the correct deficiency? What is that definition?
M. Laitman: A correct deficiency means a deficiency that will have the force of bestowal, that's it.
Student: He doesn't look for such a deficiency?
M. Laitman: He doesn't. But you're asking this: if I have a healthy will to receive, for all kinds of pleasures of this world, if I also receive the point in the heart, so I want pleasures of the next world even more, which I don't know what that is, but it's more. So my question is, how could it be that from this desire of the point in the heart, where I want, let's say, the spiritual world, I want, I don't know what it is, I want. If I just increase that desire, that will be Pharaoh - I want spirituality. How could it be that in this desire, which is an egoistic desire, there will begin to be something for Lishma, something for the Creator? As we say, that Lo Lishma, means that I want spirituality. I want to have the force to bestow to the Creator, and along with it, I also want to have something for me. This is called Lo Lishma. Lo Lishma means I'm comprised of two desires: a desire for the Creator and a desire for myself. How, from my engagement of working with the point in the heart, how do I receive a desire to bestow to the Creator? It exists in me even before the barrier begins to appear in me, begins to grow in me. Where is it born from? That's basically the question. I start with the point in the heart, and in the point in the heart, bit by bit by bit, two desires begin to evolve. A desire for myself, that is essentially the point in the heart. I increase that, I want spirituality for myself. And there begins to be a desire for the Creator there. Where does it come from? Because the development of the point in the heart by the surrounding light that shines, and it brings it the grace of holiness, that surrounding light also works. If not for the surrounding light, the point in the heart would grow to just wanting spirituality. I want to swallow it, I want it, give it to me, that's it. How, within this desire, there's also a desire to bestow to the Creator, that's a result of the surrounding light. But when does that surrounding light influence? When I look for reaching the root, reaching the root of bestowal, and that's the result of working with the society.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:13:22) So why am I looking for this root? Why? What am I lacking that I'm looking specifically for this root?
M. Laitman: Meaning, what will make me look for a desire to bestow? The surrounding light. Yes. There's no other source. We only have two forces, the will to receive and the light against it. Don't look for anything else. It's very simple. We don't want to agree with it; we don't understand it. Why? Because we are only in a will to receive. If we had something of that, everything would fall into place. The system would be clear. This way it's unclear, because we don't have the force from the other side.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:14:19) I'm drawn to spirituality. I yearn for it.
M. Laitman: Maybe, I don't know.
Student: How, in my state, can I yearn for something over which I have no grasp? I have no example like that in this world when I'm looking.
M. Laitman: You're saying, I am drawn to spirituality. How could it be that I will be drawn to true spirituality if I don't see it? I'm imagining all kinds of imaginary things. It could be completely, totally far from it and not spiritual. So how will I find the right goal? Right? You have no example. Only from your work correctly, your engagement with the study, with dissemination, with the friends, only from that within you, there will be some fact that will form, which will also keep improving all the time, of what is spirituality. And each time, it will be more and more precise. And sometimes, there will come such drastic changes that you'll feel, oh, well, what I thought is not it at all. You see, some are familiar with this. That's how it is.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:15:49) You said, in the article, that the time of preparation is considered according to one's exertion. What does that mean?
M. Laitman: I don't know where it's written there. The time of preparation is a time of awakening from above, when a person works from the desire the Creator gives him. But from the desire the Creator gives him, he has to process that desire in such a way that it will become a desire called Lo Lishma. And from that Lo Lishma, we come to Lishma.
Student: We need to what?
M. Laitman: Of course, we are working and we are being impressed by an awakening from above. But on top of that, we have to work. Execution should be that this awakening from above, we bit by bit by bit transform it to an awakening from below. This is called from the man who inseminates first, the female is born, and that female needs to be brought to a point where it's very great and it is capable of giving birth to a male.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:17:25) You're saying that this is a process where we are in charge of the pace. How can I grow our states? How can I accelerate them, advance them?
M. Laitman: To precede our states, how can we hasten our states? Only by scrutinizing what exactly in each and every state depends on me. The method is simple. Psychological. There's a problem I'm facing each time. I have to see my desire, sort out what I'm capable and incapable of, what depends on me or doesn't. How do I realize it? And what exactly do I need out of that desire? After all the scrutinies, if I do the work of scrutiny correctly, I have to reach a conclusion that the desire itself, as it appeared in me, it appeared the way it is. I, rather, have to tie that desire to the Creator. That's the whole work. And from tying it to the Creator, then over this desire descends the right and correct intention - how to use that desire. That when I've connected the intention with the desire, I essentially completed the whole work. The desire given by the Creator, the intention given by me, and then we are in a Zivug, coupling, adhesion, connection with Him, both of them, that's all.
Student: Meaning, every desire that comes to me, I attach it to Him?
M. Laitman: In simplicity, any desire that comes to me, I need to connect to Him. You know, if you know exactly what is the desire, and if you knew who is He and what is He, and you could connect them both, you know, like taking two things and plugging them together, that's fine. But here, we have to scrutinize. What is He? Who is He? What does it mean to connect the desire to Him? Right? And that is where our entire work is. It's not sufficient that the desire comes from Him, and I connect that desire to Him. Why did He give it to me? What does He want from it? What do I want from the desire He gave me? And what do I want for Him? And so forth. This chain of scrutinies ultimately leads to scrutinizing my intention, meaning my relation to what I got from Him. That's it.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:20:40) How does it work in one's feeling, you know, when I connect to someone else's vessel? What is it, through envy? How does that work?
M. Laitman: Right. How do we connect to a foreign vessel outside of me? With the Creator, we can't just connect. To begin with, we wouldn't be capable. Even if it were revealed, then our will to receive would simply work and wouldn't allow us to make any action to reach in order to bestow. With my friends, I have the opportunity to do this, and we don't realize how much this world is built wondrously for this work. That from the root of coming to that work, that's why it's built this way, the way it does. I have tendencies, as we call them, which are envy, lust, and honor. By those three, I come to the true scrutiny of desire and intention.
Student: How does it work in each and every one of them?
M. Laitman: Meaning, the will to receive has these forces called envy, lust, and honor, by which it can relate to others outside of him. And by that, he can begin to connect with them, to receive from them. And through those channels, to begin to realize where he is and where they are opposite his ego. I want spirituality. Now, I need to be close to other people specifically to receive spirituality. That's something that comes very slowly, that years can go by until a person nevertheless begins to hear that this is probably the problem, that here lies the whole stumbling block, that for years I've heard and read, and yet I thought that this is something, you know, on the sidelines. And I couldn't do anything. Now, I understand a bit better that this is probably important, that this holds the key to spirituality. And I can write to you a thousand times, “The key to spirituality is the friend. The key to spirituality is the friend.” It's not going to help. It's not going to help. It's just only after many; many occurrences take place and then somehow this feeling begins. It begins to, I don't know, it begins to be felt at heart and not just in the mind. Intellectually, okay, this Torah, as I now hear about the society and everything, I can preach to everyone. Ask your friend there. Ask him how he says about this enthusiastically to everyone, and they're enthusiastic from him. Okay, but how do you put it into the heart?
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:24:46) How do I, how can I see in the desires that I must work with day in, day out? This thing of bestowal, there are desires where I can, I simply don't have the resolution. We talked about that when I measure bestowal, let's say in the work with friends of the environment. If I see the intention is for myself on this action, it's as if the action has no meaning. But if the intention is relative to them, what do I gain out of it? Or is it the action itself? And there are such desires where their essence is only relative to others. They have no meaning in and of themselves. So how can I scrutinize that? How can I work with such desires? I can’t put them on hold; I have to work with them every day. How can I see in them the ability to bestow with them?
M. Laitman: It seems to us that our desires to bestow of today, they are what we are continuing forward with. But that could be completely incorrect, that those desires where we think we are somewhat corrected, they're actually desires that are, it's just, it's just humanly bestowing, right? And specifically the desires that we have that seem very far from Kabbalah, from spirituality, they will be the desires in which and with which we will use in spirituality and discover it.
Student: But if the essence of the desire is the intention, it's like if I take away the intention in order to receive from this desire, there will be nothing left. Maybe there's some pleasure, but how can you turn such a thing to bestow, as if to use it differently?
M. Laitman: In each and every desire there is nothing but intention.
Student: Why? There are desires that exist, let's say, like food, or I don't know, sleep. They're not in relation to others. These are things that I must have for myself. It doesn't matter if I sleep more, relative to others. It's not about my pleasure, my pleasure is like from, you know… Are there desires where I have more than the intention?
M. Laitman: Desires where we have something outside of the intention is, I don't know, it's things that, the desires to exist. Even in this world, why do I want more than bread and water? Something that the body just naturally demands. How much does it really demand, this body? I need to have a 20 plus something degrees temperature, and this and that amount of calories, a few little flavors, and you know, wife, kids, naturally, whatever my body would demand if I lived alone. All the things that I demand more than that have already been made in me as a human with respect to the still, vegetative, inanimate, from the intention.
Question (Petah Tikva Center): (01:28:07) Now, I'm taking these desires relative to the society. I see how the intention there is everything. I turn to Him, but I know that in Kabbalah we don't speak of actions. Nevertheless, how do I continue to move in my day-to-day as if it's, you know, it’s internal, but …
M. Laitman: So, you simply need to each time to scrutinize your attitude. How do I relate to what I want? And the best thing for that, I've said, is put the Creator into the picture. Then it'll be clear, somehow.
Student: But it's like you're living here hypocritically, because on the one hand, you demand the ability to bestow. On the other hand, you say that the essence of your existence is like everything that you do all the time, it is to receive.
M. Laitman: Did I tell you that you are a complete and whole person? You're split? That's fine.