Morning Lesson March 19, 2021
is made from simultaneous translation which leaves possibility for differences from audio.
1. Rav’s Introduction: This topic is a short one, he who hardened his heart this is how it is called, where does it stem from, he who made his heart hard where is this evil inclination then down below in this world, in one of the people called Avraham who is the father of the nation, the father of the group who started a yearning for the Creator with the question who we are, what are we, where we are heading. First of all, he asked by what can we reach the purpose of creation when he discovered it and then the Creator said don’t you worry, I will show you help and this help will be precisely against me and it will be called Pharaoh. Here we also need to go a bit earlier to the beginning of this whole process that the upper force wanted to establish Adam similar to him and then he has to bring this Adam to qualities. One, that he is going to be opposite to the Creator otherwise he cannot exist and the other is that give him forces, to be able to resemble him, to rise all the way to the degree of the Creator, to become like the Creator. This is why we learn that from the beginning of creation, man was created as the Torah is telling us not in a good way or better way but man was an angel, entirely incorporated inside the Creator. Incorporated inside the Creator and existing on the same level.
This is let's say like an embryo in the mother's womb, being inside the mother and not separated from her. This is the first state of man and the later on, he begins to disconnect from this state and more and more to distance himself from the Creator who gave him life. Then he becomes more and more independent, standing on his own forces, the opposite forces from the Creator because otherwise how could he be different from the Creator, how could he disconnect from the Creator only by getting another desire. It does not matter in which qualities he exists within himself instead, does he ascribe himself to the Creator or not. With everything that is in him does he feel that he is an inseparable part of the Creator or not. In the state, where this person exists connected to the Creator in everything it is considered that he is in full faith, it is considered to be in faith above reason. That is in all of the person's desires and thoughts that wake up in him that are related to the Creator, he is opposite in his stature but he still tries to attach himself to the Creator. This way the person determines his states, that is, the Creator first created the person seemingly inside of him like an embryo inside his mother and then he gives birth to this person, in that the Creator gives him gradually qualities, desires and thoughts that are more and positive to the Creator.
This is considered as men declining from that degree which was inside the Creator and becoming more and more disconnected from the Creator which means that the person receives in him the force of reason that separates him, distinguishes him from the Creator until he declines up to the very last level which is the last degree which is opposite to the Creator. Later he has to start to get a wakeup call and strength to come back and to attach again to the Creator according to similarity of form. Then the person starts to rise up in that he acquires qualities of bestowal, which is above his reason, above his desire to receive which he receives while declining from the Creator down to this world as we call it. Now in the rise up from this point, which is opposite to the Creator, which is the very last physical point which we call this world, the person can elevate himself to the Creator. By this he keeps progressing towards him. This is rising on the degrees of faith above the person's reason which is bestowal above reception. Then the person gets forces both to receive and to bestow but uses all these forces only in order to bestow to give only in order to attach to the Creator. In each and every degree where it is in an ascent and each time the person keeps trying to add to himself forces of bestowal, forces of attachment.
The fact that the person wants to nullify his mind and emotions, everything that is in him with whatever the person has and ascribe everything to the Creator, it is coming from the Creator, there is nothing else besides Him, that is not just simply that it is the Creator doing it to me, but he is doing it in order to come closer to the Creator to be attached to the Creator as much as possible. This is why I rise up and I elevate myself again and again to come to a state in each and every moment, I try to at least get back to the moment where I exist in the Creator as an embryo in the Mother's womb. We also to ascribe to the Creator everything that happens to me, that I seemingly never leave him, I stay inside him it is just a seemingly that I am outside and I am disconnected and whatever is happening is that the in spite of the forces of the separation, I have to bring myself to a state of unity, attachment to the Creator. Each time I have to realize that what is happening to me these are just new conditions that the Creator gives me so I will come back at that moment and attach to him again as much as possible. Until I feel that I am constantly always, even though I disconnect but I always bring myself back into the Creator but at least in yearning to him.
This is our work and in this work there are many states however all of these states we go through them out of us remembering, understanding trying to recognize that this is the same upper force that is pushing us forward to yearn to him on top of all the differences. There, this force of the Creator, which is seemingly rejecting us, we don't call it Creator, Borre, Bo Re - come and see, but it has many names and then the general name of this rejecting force is the king of Egypt. Below him there are many such negative forces which altogether, comprises this concept of the rejecting force, the concept of rejecting force, this is the 70 names of the evil inclination. We just need to realize that it is not about getting to know them, their details about the thing is that each time that some force is revealed which is rejecting, separating us, disturbing us.
Immediately we have to activate all our forces to get back into attachment to the Creator as much as possible and the action that we perform is the action of nearing and it happens in us that we work in faith above reason that we want the force of bestowal to rule of over all the forces of the separation and this is how we progress. We will read a few writings about what is the role of Pharaoh (the king of Egypt) and what we have to do accordingly and to realize that specifically the force of the king of Egypt is necessary for us in order not to remain as a drop of semen but you start advancing towards the embryo. Then a little one and then, even a great spiritual being we have to increase, grow, develop our soul and we can do it only through the negative force that reveals in us when the Creator is operating on as in such an opposite form called from the back of the neck which gives the letters of the name of the king of Egypt as well.
Excerpt 74 (12:55 - 13:41)
2. R. The general force that prevents us, is called the king of Egypt, this is the strongest force accumulating in it all these specific particular forces that it has all the states all the degrees the evil force that establishes the degree so we always have to turn to the Creator only. By that then rise above each and the every degree that is specifically built by the evil force and this is how we progress so we have Zichon and Og, which are particular special forces spiritual forces you could say anti spiritual and the king of Egypt stands above all of them king of Egypt is truly against the Creator he is the one who is a separating us, hiding the upper force from us, the force of faith and giving all the other forces work in the more temperate form against the force of bestowal.
Excerpt 75 (15:10 - 16:30)
3. R. This is actually the only correct remedy, the prescription for all the problems on this path that with everything that is happening we need to realize that it is all happening in order to aim ourselves more and more precisely, correctly towards the Creator. That in him we need to find the right solution whether it is pleasant or another pleasant force, good or bad, it does not matter the better this is I correcting the future, that I advance towards the Creator. This is how we need to see every step on the way, in my life that I am aimed through all kinds of confusions and I don't know why and which way. I have to find the direction to the Creator and try in this direction to take some small action of closeness and by this they can already see that I was in a state where specifically this state was good because its progress is me towards the direction towards the Creator. The result is that I get additional forces of bestowal on top of the forces of a reception revealing in me before, this is considered to acquire the force of faith above reason from this. We can see that the Creator, with this question how can I build Adam, man, disconnected from himself then the Creator created us in such a way, he lowered us from the degree than which we were incorporated in him in the world of Ein Sof through the construction of the spiritual worlds and the spiritual Partzufim is all the through the world of Adam HaRishon then it was already done through the shattering and we have to try to rise back in return with the force of getting on top of the forces of reception which is called in faith above reason.
4. S. (18:58) We always note the Pharaoh as a negative force, and yesterday in our 10 meeting we found it to be a very positive force that brings us to the Creator. Because without Pharaoh we would not be able to come closer to the Creator, we would sit in apathy . . .
R. Now you understand there is no evil force in the world at all. But rather, these forces are working on us in order to aim us correctly to our development. And it is very nice and good that we are developing in this way. I hope that just like you, all the other friends around the world realize that there is no evil in the world but instead the upper force, the Creator is only arranging these forces one against the other, left against the right, darkness against light, to teach us how to reach the best possible state. This is why we need to, as it is written in many places, that ‘man should bless over the evil as over the good,’ and more and more. And I also said it a few times recently that Jacob blessed Pharaoh, and it is good. Meaning that the fact that we are operating, even now today we can feel all kinds of seemingly evil forces are working on us, we need to try to discover behind them, the good force which is working in such a way in order to promote us. To elevate us into faith above reason so that we can come closer to Him. The moment we come closer to the Creator all these evil forces will become good forces. And then we begin to understand that these bad forces came only in order to advance us to the good state. This is what we will hopefully discover.
5. S. (21:37) Rabash writes of the obstructors, that only the Creator can help against them. He helps us individually against these obstructors or in some more general way?
R. We have to see in our whole life, forces of restrictions and forces of assistance, as one single complex -- one assembly. Through these and those together, we have to keep ourselves on a certain line towards the source which is the Creator and in Him we see our goal and the direction of our thoughts and expectations, everything in the Creator. I do not know precisely what is good or evil, this rejection, attraction. I just want to detect the source of all of these forces and to this Source I ascribe all the other forces. The Creator who is this source and also the Pharaoh, and all kinds of particular forces, positive and negative, I just want one thing from each and every state I am in -- to try to be towards the Creator. To be constantly in action with an inclination that, just like a baby that always wants and if something is not right to him, the baby immediately performs an instinctive action to come closer to mother. This is what we need to be with me. Therefore, in all of our states during the day, which we detect in our emotions and in our intellect, that we are becoming disconnected from the Creator, we have to realize that this is what He awakens in us. Even the smallest things it is the Creator who awakens in us. Through these wake-up calls, we can immediately demand to come closer to Him.
6. (24:22) It’s said in order to praise the good you don't recommend working actively with the bad but to yearn for connection. What are we missing so we can also start to work with the bad in a good way?
R. We don't have to work in any other way. In the state that we’re in now, we have to advance towards the Creator in all the states where we find ourselves. I don't need to invert the bad to good, I need to see the Creator before me. I want to reach Him. If I get some awakening, negative or positive, it's only in order to aim myself even more to the Creator. This is all we need. We are now learning how to run away from the bad in order to reach good. This is called the Exodus from Egypt. Let's do this. It seems to me that your group is all getting entangled in something. That you want to add and discover all kinds of things that will not come together correctly in the end.
S. So how to understand how to bless the bad as the good in the 10?
R. All of the negative things revealed will only aim you to the Creator. You bless over all the negative phenomena because they even more precisely, sharply, practically advancing you towards the Creator. When we want a baby not to run away from us, we scare the baby, “watch out,” “look what's there.” He comes closer to us. This is called that we ourselves are awakening the bad in order to awaken the person to come closer to the good.
S. Simply as much as I understand, the main confusion which appears in the 10th is when we read this rule of having to thank or praise the bad as the good.
R. Yes, we need to praise the evil as the good because these two forces are leading us to the Creator. And the bad leads us more than the good. And we also see this in our lives, that when a little child is affected most by fear. I don't know. It seems to me that you are too clever. You do not want to take these things in a simple way but you want to go in all kinds of different directions with philosophy and different calculations. It is not good. The wisdom is actually speaking in a very simple and practical way.
7. (28:08) If we bless the bad as good, how can we reach faith above reason?
Specifically, because we use the bad forces as well as the good forces in order to ascribe them to the Creator.
8. S. (32:22) How can we reveal the Creator on top of the forces that separate as in the 10?
R. We need to try, upon these forces that are separating us, not to cancel them but to bring the forces of connection. To realize that all the forces of separation are reviewed only in order to build another level a greater desire to receive. And upon it, we want to have a cover. This is called ‘loves all crimes.’ And we want to cover all of the lack of connection, the rejection which we feel between us, specifically in the opposite form. Why? Because specifically through such actions, we come closer to the Creator. The form of the Creator is a form we build out of darkness, out of rejections between us. When we dress it, cover it with the force of connection, this is why it is called Bore, Bo Re, Come and See. We need to understand there is a great work, here, in how we establish the shape of the Creator between us. We do not feel or discover anything outside of us, it is all inside the ill to receive so this is how we have to build Him.
9. S. (30:51) What is the difference between the work in the 10 when a friend strengthens his heart against the Creator or hardens his heart against Israel?
R. What does it mean to harden your heart against Israel? There is no such thing in spirituality. it is all against the Creator. Israel is the group that is yearning to reach adhesion with the Creator, so maybe they mean that they don't want to take part in that group in order to connect between us. But the whole 10 is considered Israel. That through the connection between the friends they want to reach adhesion with the Creator. This is actually the definition of
Yashar El, straight to the Creator,’ which means Israel.
10. S. (32:14) What are these forces that harden?
R. What does it matter what these forces are. Right now, we’re studying in general that there are forces that depict all kinds of bad things to us on our way to adhesion. We have to rise above them and precisely, what is happening with these forces is not for us right now. Later we will discover them but at the moment, it will just confuse us. Now we need, with every step of the way, in every moment in my life and this is always correct -- along the way anything that is working on me, I have to discover that this is the Creator who rejects me or pulls me towards Him. But in every moment in my existence, I have to discover that the Creator relates to me in such a way and He is expecting of me that I will turn to Him and I will want to reach Him, to come closer to Him, to adhere to Him. This is actually what I have to do. Every moment from all these states, if I am, therefore, demand the force of bestowal to reach, embrace, relate to Him. To be in faith above reason as we call it.
Reader Excerpt 76 (34:40 - 36:19)
11. R. Because besides Pharaoh, all of the other forces we feel, they somehow hide from us the importance of the goal but Pharaoh is hiding from us the importance of the Creator, Himself. And this is why he is actually the worst, the greatest force, the primary one who is preventing us on the path. All our work has to be between us only in increasing the greatness of the Creator between us. How much in each step along the way wherever we are we need to see that it is all coming from the Creator and not from anywhere else. When all kinds of forces appear as we learned some time ago that we have Zichon and Og and many other such forces appear it is all in order to hide from us Pharaoh. We need to move them aside and realize this is not about these particular forces that are hindering us in some way but rather the importance of the Creator, the greatness of the Creator in our eyes. This is what Pharaoh is bringing us, that we do not have such importance and greatness of the Creator between us and this is the primary thing.
Therefore, our whole fight should be only with Pharaoh and our work, specifically, is to move aside all these secondary forces that are hindering us and realize that the entire problem in our work is only that we have a single hindrance which is Pharaoh who is telling us that the Creator is not so important. That we don't depend on Him, that we don't need to reach Him, but rather any other thing. Go and engage in something secondary, something less important. But specifically, in us detecting the force of Pharaoh, we have to see how much this force is aiming us to the Creator. Therefore, specifically Pharaoh is the hindering force but behind him we see the Creator standing behind him and this is how we determine our correct connection with the Creator. This is why we have to try to see not the particular forces, not all kinds of things that are happening in all kinds of different forms. This is secondary, it’s not important. What is most important for us to constantly realize that we have a force standing opposite us that is hiding the Creator and this is what we have to remove from our path to get it out of our way and if we aim ourselves correctly in such a way then behind Pharaoh stands the Creator. This is just the anterior and the posterior. One time it is Pharaoh, the other time it is the Creator and it is good if we will always recognize and detect that we are only standing opposite either Pharaoh or the Creator. There is nothing else. Understanding this is the correct good and sharp state.
12. S (40:25) Help us to solve this contradiction. There are those who love the Creator and those who hate evil. What are we talking about here?
R. To the extent I yearn towards love of the creator and to that extent I hate all of the qualities and all of the states that hinder me in that and this is what I call bad, evil. What is bad? Bad is what is standing between me and the Creator. Very simple. Try not to get confused with all kinds of names and actions but see the right straight path and then whatever is revealed and this to our actions to our way towards our goal that's it there is nothing else. All of our confusion is because we pay attention to secondary things.
13. S. (41:40) How does my attitude towards Pharaoh change when I discover that it is specifically him that stabilizes me the Creator?
R. To the point, your attitude to the Pharaoh is a matter-of-fact attitude. You have to discover him, to know who is standing before you because specifically in such a way you prepare yourself. You don't go through Pharaoh if you don't feel his blows and you don't run away from him you cannot reach a meeting with the Creator. In each and every state as I said already in each and every state, we have to see how these forces are separating us. They are rejecting us but they are pushing away and they are not allowing us to come closer to the Creator but we do want them and we can’t and then we do not know how to move them from our path and then we cry out, as it is says that “the children of Israel sighed from the work”, and this is how we reach a state that is called ‘the tearing of the Red Sea” and with all the obstacles on the way is that we feel that we want to come closer to the Creator and we feel that our internal forces, which is Pharaoh and all of the other obstructors that they are not allowing us to come closer so we cry and the wants to reach it but we cannot and it seems that we do not have the forces to do this.
This is the struggle and then return to the Creator so he could give us more forces and we constantly pray and realize we simply cannot we cannot accumulate in as these feelings inclinations the longing the simply cannot and then we cry out more and more until the feel that in the intensive flying connection between is we can reach a state where we are ready to jump into the water into the sea like that character only this connection between is because such in that momentary are ready we are willing and then as it says all the army of the king of Egypt drowns in the sea and then we can cross the boundary the barrier and then the rise from the physical degree to the first spiritual degree which is already on the way to the reception of the Torah which is not spiritual yet but we do never jealous disconnect from the state called the king of Egypt. Here we need to realize that Pharaoh is not so bad just like all of his soldiers, his forces that confuse us that carry us in different directions and yesterday we also spoke about it that even earlier that Pharaoh knows that he needs to promote us to the goal and all of his particular forces and them we don't quite detect that.
14. S. (46:23) We heard you said we need to go above reason but our nature gives us fear from the unknown. It doesn't allow us to get to the point of the strengthening or the hardening of the heart so how do we overcome this weakness?
R. This needs to be done. This needs to be revealed slowly within us what faith above reason is that it comes to us from a degree of coarseness that we reveal that doesn't let us advance and aim ourselves towards connection and bestowal towards the Creator, to the 10. This will happen slowly, this is revealed. I would just ask if you were going over our lessons later throughout the day, if it is enough for you and you don't need more than that because otherwise you cannot grasp and receive what is going on in the lesson. But if you go over the lesson throughout the day then for certain the next day, we are already ready for the next dose.
Try to build the general picture of Adam HaRishon that was in the Creator and how he received an additional will to receive which begets him from, lowering him from the world of infinity to the degree of this world and this descent where he received reason, a big will to receive which is seemingly under his authority in order to receive and what he needs to do now in this world to rise to the world of Ein Sof to the upper world where it will be faith above reason. Where the force of bestowal will be more than the force of reception so in the point above, bestowal above reception and below reception above bestowal this way these two points in between them we need to exist that we are now truly in the lowest point, in the bottom point. We're only the force of reception that controls us and we need the force of Bina, the force of bestowal more to bring them upon the force of reception, face above reason. Think about that as well.
S. Yesterday we did the exercise every 15 minutes that you gave us with playing a sound. Will this help us come out of this lowly state?
R. Do like we should and all the time as much as we need and you will see that it helps. These are questions that there are no answers for, the answers you will see later after the exercises.
15. S. (50:29) Why do we sometimes feel Pharaoh as nice and sympathetic?
R. Because it really is a nice and sympathetic force drawing us to the Creator although its action upon us is the opposite action because we can't uplift ourselves. Let's say you're sitting on the couch or lying-in bed and this is good for you and how can we raise you up. There are people that say let's go for a walk and that this is very nice and good, that this is warm and nice for me. But God forbid if some trouble comes to you will jump out of your bed, mean forces operate on us much more than the good forces, much more powerful than the good forces, therefore Pharaoh is a true help, evil inclination against does in the concentration to help us advance. But if we receive the method and understand that this force of bad it influences us to hasten our development then the moment that we feel this force of bad that is influencing us we need to immediately respond in the right way through connection between us.
Then we rise above this force of evil to the good, too connection to mutual bestowal and then we once again discover even greater forces and then again cover it with the force of good, going through these degrees beginning to discover in these degrees the spiritual states, spiritual degrees, worlds. This is why all of our work is to reveal evil. Meaning when the evil is revealed? When we are willing and ready for it, when we gave a certain tendency, aim towards connection and bestowal, something then we start to discover in its things that bother us and again we rise above it and we add more bothering to it this is how again and again we start to work both in the force of the left and the force of the right that we will soon reveal the spiritual degrees. The states in which we don't yet discover spirituality and corporeality and the difference between them will be revealed, we simply don't have it in a powerful enough way because we are not working in the right connection with this.
16.
S.
(53:55)
What
exactly
means
to
go
opposite
the
Creator?
R.
Against.
That
is
where
you
are
going
after
all
kinds
of
advices
that
suits
your
body
that
are
as
suitable
to
your
egoistic
desire,
food,
sex,
family,
money,
honor
knowledge,
when
you
are
in
that
and
you
move
forward
with
that.
This
is
called
that
you
are
following
the
evil
inclination,
the
corporeal
evil
inclination
and
then
you
will
come
to
greater
vessels
into
the
spiritual
evil
inclination.
17. S. (55:20) When some phenomena become revealed we have an inclination to ascribe it to the Creator but not through the 10 how do we do this correctly through the 10?
R. Connect between you and talk between you or even if you are not connected now at this moment but make a calculation that you do want to do this with the force of the general group, to be connected together and that way you can try.
S. Seemingly instinctively I feel that I am turning by myself and that it's not through the 10.
R. Even if it's not through the 10 but also if you address it on your own is something at least you're trying to do something even though this action is not spiritual. Spirituality is only through the 10.
18. S. (56:28) The connection between us in the 10 this can only be done through Pharaoh, opposite Pharaoh?
R. Yes, connection between us can only be upon the face of Pharaoh.
19. S. (56:55) Why is there such a gap in receiving the states a bad and good between corporeality and spirituality? Let's say when we study about Pharaoh that bad is good that it is to our benefit, something in the corporeal world seems like it is the end of the world. What is the purpose of this conflict?
R. I don't think that was time if you look at history, you will see that it operates also more or less in the same direction, try to look at the history in a global way and you will see that this is how it is that you can't advance to good without the bad, not without the opposite force it is also this way in the family and in society, it is always this way.
20. S. (58:05) Our path is full of shaking, one moment you feel great in your right there and the next moment you are down in the trash, is there anything that can help us go through the path that is more pleasant than balanced?
R. What do you want?
S. Is there a way that we can go through these shakes to soften it a bit back going through the pathway that is more moderate and more balanced?
R. Yes, of course go out into retirement and you will have a good life.
21. S. (58:54) I noticed that within your examples many times you give the example of the mother and the baby and certainly we understand these examples but also, we feel these examples are irrelevant to my spiritual development because the baby responds instinctively to his mother's actions but I on the other hand do not respond instinctively spiritually to the actions that the Creator or Pharaoh is performing on me. I don't have a spiritual Instinct, being devoid of this so how do I develop this instinct so it will be easier?
R. You would develop in the form of an angel it is called a holy animal. A holy animal would carry out actions that are demanded of you in the form of bestowal just like now you asked and execute actions in the form of reception. It is called that there are animals and that there are holy animals, so you would be holy in behaving that way. If the Creator demands you can't run away from it, that if you need to grow as Adam, one who resembles the Creator then you have no choice but to grow as the Kabbalists tell us where you need to be incorporated by two forces, the force of good and the force of bad and inside of you to see where the good and the bad is to complete them in such a way that the force of good will cover the force of bad where the force of bad and in truth this gives you the whole forum and the force of good gives you just the intention and this is how you will advance.
22. S. (01:01:07) We tried to fight with Pharaoh and now we understand even more in the struggle that we have to approach the Creator so how?
R. We don't need to run away from Pharaoh even though it's written this way but we need to try to come closer to the Creator’s work we need to try and attempt to ask all of the time for the Creator to bring us closer to him, not to ask to run away from Pharaoh. For what? It is best if we ask for him to bring us closer to the Creator and then in such a way we will succeed better.
23. S. (01:02:10) Is there a right way to turn to the Creator so that he will listen to us?
R. The right way to turn to the Creator so he will listen to us is if we connect and to be as much as possible united, connected. It is like a choir that sings although each with his voice and each with his vocal cords but that all in all we can see how they sing and we can see how they do this act of song and in that same example to do it this way between you. Only in such a way can we turn to the Creator and receive such a response and hear the response to understand it.
24. S. (01:03:55) Are there some minimal conditions with which we get a response from the creator?
R. We always receive a response from the Creator. It's not that we don't receive a response it's just that we don't identify it yet. We don't turn to him in the same way or the same power that is necessary to turn but we always receive because we are actually in Him. In Him is like an embryo inside the womb, this is how we are. Where all of the corporeal forms that we see in this world is like the embryo develops in the womb and later is born, it all stems from spirituality. It all stems from the fact that we need to grow ourselves in this way, to grow and to relate to the one who gave birth to us.
25. S. (01:05:06) I feel sometimes that I am looking at Pharaoh at that moment he is pulling me back and it scares me. How can I overcome Pharaoh and how is it possible to stand and keep going with your face forward and put myself opposite him?
R. You will see how it is possible in the group I have no other answer in the group, to connect to the group and start thinking of how you place yourself and everyone together as one before Pharaoh and very quickly that you will see this form into the true correct appeal.
26. S. (01:06:07) In the recent period of time we feel it the 10 that all of these topics that we go through, before we were always in a prayer now in studying Pharaoh, we feel the burden of Pharaoh in the 10 what do we do to feel all of them together?
R. That is your work, I have nothing to do. You have to do and certainly this is not simple as it is the most difficult work as we always forget about it, we don't want that it is some gift that has been prepared for us and here. We need to be in this exertion, that it is exactly the work and faith above reason. Each in his to each be apart with his will to receive, connection between us is to be in the force of faith, the force of mutual bestowal and between us later to the Creator this is called the work in faith above reason, what is the difference between the egoistic will to receive that enters Egypt which is all individualized It’s like the brothers who don't want to get along with Joseph they wanted to collect and gather but they don't want that, this is what happens. What happens later, the Exodus from Egypt is a nation that emerges from Egypt, meaning first of all they truly grew as a very big group, from those 70 souls that entered Egypt and the millions that exit Egypt.
They multiplied and grew but the main thing is just that they made themselves the nation, not just some herd but rather they want to be connected and to exit themselves. Why is it that Pharaoh is throwing them out of Egypt? No, he gives them bad conditions. No, he gives them good conditions. Later they cry where is that Egypt that we were in? Where we had food. drink, and the best pieces of land. Why are we running away? There is only one thing that we do have. The Creator is not revealed in Egypt. This is one thing that is missing. They grow in Egypt to a state in which they discover that if it is not for the connection with the Creator, my death is better than my life. I can't remain in that and this is why they leave. This is the situation and the point is the main thing is connection, before we connect, we can't exit, we don't enter spirituality other ways.
27. S. (01:09:55) I noticed that one of the phenomena that Pharaoh is creating is that he wastes time. He goes through the day saying not today, tomorrow, all kinds of sensations. When I look at you, I see that you are the opposite. You are taking advantage of each and every moment Together charging it as if you don't have another opportunity. How in the 10 do we generate such urgency that we don't have any time that today is a moment to take advantage of?
R. You need to go by the lessons, I have a plan and according to that plan I work. Now every day we have a piece that we receive to understand and feel and together we all around it and unite in our 10’s and format ourselves each time correctly through the morning lesson. This is what we need to do. Therefore, I prepare myself for the lesson, what will I talk about and what will I tell you and this is how it forms. Sometimes it comes out different than what I planned but it comes out and that is how it is. I try to be ready in advance. When I go to sleep in the evening, I already know what I will rise in the morning with and before I awake in the morning this movie, this script of the lesson is already going through me and I am awakening from it happening and awakening me.
S. I look at you sometimes in an action that we are supposed to do. You get into it as if there is nothing else and you are giving it the utmost importance. How can we reach such a state?
R. Is there anything more important, maybe show me?
S. There is nothing more important but how do you get this sense of urgency?
R. I understand that there is nothing more important and I attribute the importance to it, this is natural. I try to engage in what is important. Why do I engage in if not? It also turns out that for someone who can engage in all kinds of things that are not as important, but we need to try to be aimed towards the goal even though along the way it happens this way and that way.
28. S. (01:12:15) It turns out that the Creator is playing both the role of Pharaoh, the evil inclination in order for us to understand what is good and what is bad, is that what it is?
R. Correct, yes now you feel it. Very good. There is no other force, there is none else besides him, there is only one force and he is playing with us both in the good and in the bad. He will advance and educate us, helping us to understand how to make a thing out of its opposite. The Creator can't get us to know him unless he shows us opposite things from him as well. between those two manners of him, one is Pharaoh and one is the creator, we begin to identify him correctly and to adhere to him. To adhere to him with every force of Pharaoh we can’t adhere to him without the force of Pharaoh. The force of bad always remains.
29. S. (01:15:07) When you say that we have to go over the materials together you mean in our meetings or together with each one by himself?
R. I think throughout the day you need to talk about the morning lesson also together and apart as well and to be in this lesson even if it is a little shortened with all of the talks that we do but nevertheless from that to be in the topic that we engage in.
30. S. (01:15:56) Israel multiplied in Egypt. What do we do with these feelings of lack of connection because half of the 10 are not participating?
R. That is your problem. I don't know, these questions I hear but I can't answer them, what to do with the friends who don't arrive, that they don't want to come. They don't want to move forward with us. They want to be only as observers and not participants so you need to take into account that maybe with time at some point that they will join but for the time being that they prefer to make their life as pleasant as possible for themselves. There is nothing that you can do. I will also tell you that our work is hard work. A person that is three or four hours in the morning lesson is truly breaking his day this way and later he has to go back over it and speak about it with his 10, this is truly something that takes many hours of his day. Even though I really respect you and you are great that the Creator wants you to adhere in to come close to him but there are those who it doesn't attract them so much and therefore they prefer to remain where they are. We will give them some kind of possibility to always return but actually that they don't need to draw us to them but that we need to be attracted and drawn to the path is much as we can where are there a 10 or less than that it doesn't matter but that we remain and whenever they can they join.
31. S. (01:18:24) Each day in the 10 we go over the excerpts, reading them and we also prepare and you ask that each one will write in advance what is right to say in our meeting and there are those who succeed to ride in advance and there are those who don't but that rather throughout the common reading it opens up for them and they read or write, should we write in advance.
R. You don't need to argue, there are those who are writers. You don't even ask for and they write. Then there are those who are not capable and they don't feel like it, they can't or that they can't put what they're thinking on a piece of paper. There are different kinds, everything will work out.
32. S. (1:19:34) The forces of pharaoh are forces that are revealed only in the 10, all sorts of corporeal problems are also Pharaoh's forces?
R. Everything is the forces of pharaoh and they are all for us to come closer to the Creator therefore of course our whole correct response needs to be an appeal to the Creator this does not free us from taking care of corporeal matters, if there is no force there is no Torah we have to do so. But we will come to a point where we don't have to do as we will rise with this whole world to the spiritual world and then we won't have to make up for the lack of our spiritual work in corporeal work.
Excerpt 77 Reader (01:20:40 -01:22:37) twice
Excerpt 78 Reader (01:22:40 - 01:23:14)
33. R. These are actually the questions a person feels awakening in him and these questions stop us in the work on one hand and on the other hand they actually aim us towards the work where we need to continue to come closer to the Creator specifically on these channels, on these questions, who is the Lord that I should listen to him and why do I need to respect the Creator and I myself towards him, what is this work for you? What is it that we need to do to come closer to him, what is the whole engagement where we should constantly ask and then through these questions that we already come closer to the understanding of Egypt, of what it is and where we are and if so, are we already coming closer to the exit? It is for certain that these questions will lead us to the exit.
Excerpt 79 Reader (01:24:25 -01:25:13)
34. R. Because I understood how this is not in the forces of man this act of bestowal, this force of bestowal.
Reader continues “The body resisted with all of its might so they would know...” (01:25:22- 01:26:21)
35. S. (01:26:23) We have in our group times where one or two friends hardly get to the lesson.
R. When do they connect or not at all? You're saying that every day in the morning you have such 10s where in the whole 10 only one person comes, when do they connect?
S. They connect throughout the day.
R. Throughout the day they connect? Do they hear the lesson?
S. Yes.
R. If they hear the lesson throughout the day then somehow together it is okay it doesn't have to be necessarily in the morning lesson, as far as I am concerned it is not important but for it to actually happen, for them to go over the morning lesson and as much as possible between them together that this is what is important.
36. S. (01:28:05) Why did Pharaoh only let them go in the last plague, what is so unique about that plague that Pharaoh was willing to let them go.
R. The blow of the firstborn is a very hard blow. We will learn about it. It is the last of the plagues, the blood and all of the rest and the last one is the firstborn, it is the hardest and the strongest and it is according to Malchut and Malchut returns to the Keter in the general structure of the Soul.
37. S. (01:29:52) How even though there's a fear that evil awakens in us that it can bring us to correction?
R. Of course the evil forces drive us to connection, if we were to activate the good forces on human beings, you would see the world getting much worse and it is today, much worse as all of us would just be spoiled and specifically because we feel that the Creator activates such forces upon us that are quite harsh then we restrict ourselves and advance. It is said as a very simple rule in the Torah. How is it said, spare the rod, spoil the child, that the more a person also hits his child he is actually showing love to his child of course this is with regards to not just any situation but rather that it is done through specific preparation and process.
38. S. (01:30:41) If Pharaoh is on our mind and the discernments don't bring us to perceive that, how can I advance spiritually?
R. You need to discuss in the group and explain to each other what is Pharaoh, what is Egypt, Pharaoh, or Moses, other discernment the people of Israel that group basically longing for the revelation of the Creator why does it have to go through Egypt? What is Egypt for that group on the one hand, they have a good life in corporeality on the other hand they discover a bad state spiritually. All of those discernments, you have to discuss this more and then from this discussion among yourselves you will understand where you are going. If you don't discuss this, if you don't discuss the topic of the lesson, not trying to philosophize about it then you don't perceive it, you don't absorb it. You have to be connected to each other in this way that you have no other choice. I am telling you very seriously that success will be in those groups who sit together and discuss this. What is Israel, what is Egypt, what is the Exile, what is redemption, what are the plagues of Egypt, what is faith and faith above reason all of those things that we have discussed you just have to pass through yourselves so that it becomes alive. This all depends upon you.
Excerpt 80 Reader (01:33:17 - 01:37:04) twice
39. R. Therefore, these two questions they advanced us the evil is the ego, the evil inclination that works within all of us, so it asks what is this work for you, what is this work of bestowal for and why should I yearn for and reach the Creator? Who is the Creator that I should listen to his voice? These things are not understood for us, why do we need to direct ourselves to this goal?
Excerpt 81 Reader (01:37:49 - 01:43:40) thrice
40. R. We see how many stages there are in the work that we have to go through that they come one by one, one after the other until they bring us to the correct question. Why do we need the evil and how should we correctly arrange the evil in order to direct us towards good?
Excerpt 82 Reader (01:44:16 - 01:47:31) twice
Excerpt 83 Reader (01:47:51 - 01:48:00)
41. R. Do you hear that when a person wants to follow his mind this is called the sin of the tree of knowledge?
Reader continues “this appears in two ways, in two questions ...” (01:48:10 - 01:49:59) twice.
42. R. This is a very beautiful passage, let's go to 84 and then questions.
Excerpt 84 Reader (01:50:16 - 01:51:25) twice
43. R. Now they understand that it is not exactly so but if a question awakens of what for then probably it was not in order to bestow.
Excerpt 85 Reader (01:51:37 - 01:52:28)
44. R. Meaning if this question awakens in a person, he already is outside of Kedusha because what he is asking is what for and who is the Lord that I should obey his voice. Meaning there is some condition that anything less than that is no longer spiritual if you are detached from the Creator.
Excerpt 86 Reader (01:52:53 - 01:53:51)
45. R. Mostly the overcoming is when he says that it comes from the Creator and in this way as he maintains the connection with the Creator as much as possible even the littlest connection by that he still advances on the path.
46. S. (01:54:32) What is wrong about that question, who is the Creator that I should listen to, we want to know and to adhere to him?
R. We need to understand that there is nothing bad in the world at all. It is just that there is something that directs us negatively or positively but that in essence there is nothing bad. Pharaoh is actually pushing us to the Creator, why was the evil inclination created but to push us forward and there are no bad forces in the world but because we are not as developed as we think of them as a bad force. It is like how you're looking at your teacher at school, why does she give us so much homework instead of just letting us play? This is how we think there is nothing bad in the world, all of the negative forces we just have to change and then we will see them as good forces.
S. I'm asking about saying that we want to reach adhesion to know him this is the exact question of who is the Creator that I should listen to why it is contradicting questions.
R. In order for you to recognize him from one thing and it's opposite specifically by saying that he is wrong and he did bad and I don't want this or that through this you discover who you are and who the Creator is then you begin to adapt and change yourself and attain the quality of the Creator called faith above reason. Your whole nature is called reason, your will to receive and you decide that you're going to receive the force of Bina the intention above reason, the intention to bestow.
S. What does it mean that we are attaining the Creator?
R. You attain the Creator according to the rule through your actions we know you, meaning from doing actions like the Creator he is in attainment. You attained some rejection from the Creator you want to advance towards him, by what three equivalence of form are you asking the Creator to give you somewhat of a force to bestow? Do you want him to come closer to you? You just don't know how and then the Creator gives you if you are truly asking. That he gives you the power to bestow and then you acquire the quality of the Creator and as a result you get to know him, you'll get to know the Creator only to the extent and in the way that the Creator dresses in you. How else, tell me? What do you feel in the world at all, what do you attain in the world? Only the discernment which clothes in your mind and your emotion, same thing here and your mind and emotion you expect and want, ask that the Creator will be revealed and then accordingly you advance this is called through your actions that we know you, that you are asking the Creator according to your request he ultimately appears in you and you feel and you, you feel his clothing you feel his qualities than through this you get to know him. This is called from your actions we know you, the actions of the Creator. Where? In you. Who recognizes it? You when you feel that new qualities have appeared in you.
S. How are the new qualities clothed?
R. You feel them. They are new things that you feel that you suddenly reveal them and besides that where do you sense it in your mind and your heart and then to the extent that you have changed, to that extent you begin to know the Creator. To the same extent and in the same way that the Creator is dressed in you.
S. By clothing he gives me the ability to bestow to him with no benefit?
R. Of course it is the quality which has clothed in you that you wish to give and the giving you do is your fulfillment, just like when you give to your baby. Look at the mother, how much she wants the baby to be well fed, it is as if she had it herself and it fulfills her, she doesn't need anymore. In spirituality it is exactly this way in a complete way.
S. The example with the mother she feels him as her own, she knows him and here we said that we don't want to know the Creator that we just want to get to be connected to anything.
R. You don't understand this, you do what you have to do and then we will see you will feel that you fulfill the Creator and that that is what is fulfilling you.
47. S. (02:01:33) In one of the excerpts, a question came, a person who wants to bestow to the others or the Creator does he have to believe that the Creator will accept his exertion or no?
R. Yes of course we have to believe that all of our efforts are received by the Creator and that he responds to this for certain because we are in a single system and the fact that this connection is concealed it is concealed from me but I am inside the Creator and so are all of you that all of our actions and thoughts are desires are all included in him it just doesn't reach the point yet where we feel a response but the response is there. It doesn't matter which one but that we are in a system, don't think that you are, God forbid, moving away like he writes.
S. In a different actor's play another question. Why do you have to teach a person that his evil is clothed, what does he mean? In a 10 we can and discuss what it means to receive ... not clear?
R. How can you awaken? What it is to bestow, you're talking about the friend or the other questions?
S. What does he mean?
R. I'm telling you just an example of what can influence the friend, I have towards your friend that you are already in spirituality, connection with the Creator, connection with the friends let him awaken through envy and join you, only through envy. Look at our whole egoistic world, how does it develop, fashion competition, all kinds of things? Envy, only envy is working everywhere when we look at what the others have that I want and if I don't want anything then I am falling behind. What is happening now in the whole world after this pandemic, that people don't want to learn from each other how to enjoy life so the world is stopping. Yes, we are in some sort of a decline in our desires. We have nothing with which to fulfill ourselves that we are advancing to a point where we can't fulfill ourselves with forces of reception and forces of bestowal, we don't yet achieve in order to fulfill ourselves with that. we are empty-handed and that will be truly bad. Let us imagine the situation where a woman goes into a shop and sees a dress or sees it on someone also on the street, it gives her livelihood that she also wants it, a child sees a bicycle at his neighbor's, each and everything is always built upon envy. Everything. whether it is the arms race or anything else it is all envy. As envy gradually fades in the world what will happen, what are we going to eat from now, what will nourish us, nothing as it will be very bad with respect to common people. We will have to explain to them what this time is doing to us and how we can actually enliven ourselves.
48. S. (02:06:09) How to become to ask questions that are not of the mind and the heart?
R. I don't know these are questions that are detached from the person. It is like a fictitious science or philosophical thing. Our questions have to come from the mind and the heart or why don't we have this in our mind and heart.
49. S. (02:06:59) What stages bring the 10 to reward and is there a punishment if they don't keep these stages?
R. Every moment there is a person's life there is either reward or punishment. We are in a closed system which is complete there is no emotion there is no physical emotion that doesn't bestow upon the whole system it works on the whole system and obviously then we have to take everybody into consideration. That means that we are all interdependent. It is revealed especially on spiritual degrees where we start seeing and recognizing these natural connections between us as much as we depend upon one another and as much as the smallest movement in one place in the world influences everybody. This is how we need to try and awaken the forces in us, to recognize forces of connection in us.
50. S. (02:08:46) Specifically this issue of awakening these efforts which you spoke about that you opened it earlier how to give a friend this power so that in these situations we know that it is always with respect to the center creating those forest like the water that is moving letting us feel everyday this energy that we are doing these actions here. Now how do we help the friends because sometimes the Creator burdens the heart that we go back to the connection to learn it as if we dry up and everything becomes heavy and mechanical work and so work for one person to push so they make these and all these discernments the friends feel, how to help their friends.
R. Only in example, or to give him some work or something but if you can't only be an example that will awaken envy, we are all humans we are all similar to one another according to our emotional powers and look what is working on you. Try to ask before these friends that you can't really awaken them, try acting as if there is something between you as if you want to conceal it from them. I don't know all sorts of small things even childish but that this acting helps. try but just understand that from everything we are reading you can take more pieces of advice from it, I'm not so strong at that. Regular psychology. I am weak there.
51. S. (02:11:33) Thank you, the aspect of Bina it moves to bestowal after it is filled. How do we direct ourselves to bestow when we are empty on the inside, how are you able to bestow?
R. I don't think about what I can give to the Creator I won't have anything to give him. I can only give him my feelings, my attitude, my relation like the guest the host. What does the guest say but that I am willing to receive from you, that I am willing to do this favor for you, willing to give you pleasure by me receiving from you and this is what we can give the Creator. With all the disturbance that Pharaoh brings if I yearn to the Creator. This is already my giving to the Creator that above his disturbances of Pharaoh I still yearn for him, what can you give him? This is why only we come to the Creator in order to give him our attention, our attitude, our relation and that is it.
52. S. (02:13:19) We need to be giving him bestowal consciously or unconsciously to consciously discover how to bestow to the Creator. We need to search everywhere how we can give contentment to the Creator usually it is by trying to aim us as much as we can to come closer to him as against all of the disturbances that will be in the path and with that tendency that we give him contentment. That is how it is.
53. S. (02:14:12) The excerpts spring up very deep questions kind of leaving our soul naked before the Creator when we try to get closer to the 10 or to the group, the world that's all we discover that we think who are these friends that I am going to connect with them, to serve them to give to them in order to think of their benefits is that parallel to the question of Pharaoh or the evil in me and if so, what do I do with it?
R. You need to tell yourself that all of your friends are parts of your soul, parts of your soul that there is a spiritual mechanism, the smallest that is called a soul. In this mechanism we exist, the friends and everybody is connected together to the extent that they think in such a way and they want to organize the connection in that way so this mechanism starts living and they start feeling your livelihood in this. This is what we need to put together the connection between us to such an extent that we will reveal inner spiritual life in the connection called a soul. From that connection we will get the force of bestowal, all the degree of Bina which is called a soul in the connection we will reveal the Creator and what is revealed in the Bina and this is how we will keep advancing together.
54. S. (02:16:49) Turns out the questions of who and what are a great gift from the Creator because this gives us an opportunity exactly in the right spot with opportunity to ask from the Creator to go with the 10 against Pharaoh.
R. The purpose of creation is to discover that what the Creator did is that he created a world that is entirely good, there is no evil in the world this is what we need to discover. How? When we open our eyes and see the essence of all of our actions that we see everything is happening in the best and ideal way and this is how we reached the end of correction as it is our final decision to see the whole world as good and that is how the Creator created it. We correct it ourselves sending those corrected forces we discover that the world was entirely good. What we thought was bad was because that is how we used to think about it in our corrupted vessels. Clear?
S. It means we have to be glad for these questions. It is a reward for our efforts towards Lishma, a gateway for it? If we respond correctly and raise the right prayer in response of these questions, we are directing it to him to be partners, it is special, we should be in joy and gladness?
R. I'm expecting to see it from you.
55. S. (02:19:18) We had 10 meetings yesterday where we scrutinized amazing huge things in the name of the 10 and secondly with regards to working against Pharaoh the evil inclination and the combination between the evil inclination and the Creator yesterday you said something in the writers meeting that was incredible. That basically there are different compositions made when a person rises above his personal desire and already enters the field that has been blessed by the Creator. It is like the matter changing in two different compounds. What is happening? Does this change the initial matter, the initial substance?
R. No. it just changes man's observation of what is taking place and the world doesn't change but only man changes. We're in the same world of Ein Sof, the upper light is in complete rest and everything is there. The moment the Creator created everything it was done in the best possible way and we find a way and there is no other state but the final state and it all depends upon our reception. How do we develop this perception in order to reach the true observation of everything and our corrections?
56. S. (02:21:40) Rising against the questions have the evil inclination is like diving into the Red Sea how the Creator helps us do that?
R. You know that if you want to reach the Creator it is only through the Red Sea that you have to go through it, that is the condition back then you didn't have the channel. There wasn't the river that connected you that you could come straight from Egypt right into Sinai, why didn't they just walk that way as it is written in the Torah that the creator purposefully brought them to the Red Sea. That before them there would be this obstacle and this is what they did. We need to understand that all of these obstacles are things that we have to go through and we have to imagine that the Creator is behind them that if I go over this barrier, I come closer to him and that the barrier itself is something that he did. The Pharaoh behind me that's chasing is also the Creator doing everything done in by one force and one name to establish his thoughts to stabilize it and then it won't be difficult for me to perform this jump.
57. S. (02:23:32) If we ask the Creator to help us to actually answer the questions of Pharaoh and the evil inclination, to what extent will this help us?
R. It is good to ask because everything is based upon questions and answers but where are you preparing the vessel to receive the answer. Same vessel that you borrowed from, the questions have to come from the 10 not from you alone because in such a way you don't advance to get the right answers, the powerful ones on the path. You have no choice but to organize the friends and to ask. I recommend that once a week or every day that you gather and then you really ask the questions and give the answers and write them or record them what is happening to you and then you will have a diary of your group. This is how you advance. It is very nice to go over what you went through.
S. That is what I meant that the ten is asking, not me.
R. Very good, let them ask and everybody can answer.
58. S. (02:25:35) When he asks who is the Lord that I am working for, so it indicates that so far, he worked not in bestowal, so you can be happy about the evils that unfold?
R. The main thing is that he's asking and not advancing, maybe not in a certain way but he is doing it and coming back it happens this way in life as well. We also see our friends as we have some that leave, even for a few months or even years and then they come back so what? What should we do, this is life.
59. S. (02:26:34) We talked about the importance of giving an example but can you give some advice on how to receive the example because sometimes we see friends who are used to Leading and being strong and if there is someone who gives a good example, they move aside a weekend and don't accept example, what do you advise?
R. The group has to be interested in its connection so not the ones who jump up and not the ones who are on the side and silent but all of us together have to be interested in the connection and only through this connection do we reach the goal. This is why it's not like in our life as here in spirituality it all depends upon an individual's exertion. I advise you to hurry up.
60. S. (02:27:48) How do we determine the right role of Moses between Pharaoh and the Creator?
R. Try and be aimed to the Creator and from that the point of Moses will be clarified.
61. S. (02:28:17) in excerpt 80 it seems that there is a deeper Klipot that a person wants to know that is labor I understand this is against Faith but it's in the air like the work is in the air quest.
R. What is the question?
S. Is this the correct work that others received?
R. Let's say yes for now.
62. S. (02:29:17) When the thoughts come, they distract and prevent us from feeling the Creator how can we once again feel the taste of the Creator?
R. We don't have to feel the same taste but new revelations, new flavors that are a Klipa, if I want to come back to the state that we had before. No, we want to advance to the state that should come. If I am in a group for certain it will pull me ahead if I'm alone so I will come to all kinds of thoughts that they were, that was and that is not good. That is called “the fool who sits with his hands crossed and devours his flesh”.
63. S. (02:30:44) Why are there answers to our questions that we don't currently understand but when we relisten to the lesson, it suddenly dawns on us?
R. The questions you are asking gradually to settle inside you and some time goes by and you digest what you were asking about. That is why it is always worth during the day to repeat the lesson and the questions. It gives you a lot. Whoever listens to the lesson again absorbs it inside from a new place. I really recommend that. It is more important than reading some other materials. Any material that you study you should at least do and go through twice.
S. It is a good exercise to repeat the answers with the 10 for new discernments,
R. Hear the lesson and if you have more time except for hearing the lesson, then ask questions. Not to hear the questions from the lesson, not that. Ask new questions to each other and try in the group to answer them briefly but the main thing is to listen to the lesson.
64. S. (02:32:39) Today we had a scrutiny of giving an example and this example didn't influence all the friends in such a good way. They saw that they are so far that there is no reason to make an effort.
R. The Creator gives people such exercises and I felt it myself a few times throughout my years of engaging in the wisdom of Kabbalah for over 40 years and I can say one thing, these thoughts that I'm not successful, that I can't, they are very good thoughts, very good because they bring us to faith above reason. To the degree of Bina in the shortest way. Well, if I don't succeed, you should answer those questions. I'm not succeeding, that's how the Creator Created me. What can I do? I will do what I can. I will try as much as I can as much as possible. Whatever comes out already happened. The Creator knows what is supposed to happen. He already wrote down my final form. It's already set so I will try. You don't need to be so concerned with what's going to happen with me, just change that question to what's going to come out of me for the others and suddenly everything's open. Everything is going to happen for you. There's no problem. It's a very good question. It's a good feeling that I'm not worthy of anything because of who you are, who you really are but if you keep going suddenly you will see how you can advance in faith above reason, specifically in faith above reason. I don't need anything and I won't have anything and I don't need it. If I can do something for others so I will do it. I will help them a bit, help here, help there, in dissemination so that others will know the Creator and they will succeed and then you are already in bestowal. Good Luck.