A Talk with Dr. Michael Laitman
A New Life
Talks on Parenting
Talk 276
December 30, 2013
Oren: Hello and thank you for being with us here in ‘A New Life’, the educational discussions with Dr. Michael Laitman. Hello, Dr. Laitman. Hello, Nitzah.
Dr. Laitman: Hello.
Nitzah: Hello.
Oren: We want together with you to do little journey, to understand life better, in order to take them to a better place. Our life is built from relationships. We have relationships with whoever is not us, and we would like to know how to make these relations better. So, if we go into this globe, there are two different types of people: there are men and there are women. We have a different mind, we have different emotional, internal structure, that is different and we are trying to learn how to be a little bit better. We want to learn how these two halves in the human kind operate differently and to work better. I am sure they will be many things to take to all the fields in life and topics in life and it will be fascinating. Let’s go for it, men and women, friends. Nitzah, open the discussion.
Nitzah: This topic of the male and female mind is very fascinating and the truth is, the more I learned about it and worked on it, I came to the conclusion that it is even kind of fun. That force that created us, that director, that artist, used something very similar. He took two completely opposite mechanisms, He put some kind of glue between them, some kind of force of gravity between them, and said, “Get along,” each being opposite the other. And there are endless studies and research articles and even comedy skits, because it is so fun to see how they think completely differently; how a woman thinks and how completely different, even a different perception of reality. Women live in a certain movie and men live in a different movie. And it is a different language and our communications are completely different, and as a result of living a totally different movie, so our whole making decisions, our processing of data, our whole emotional system is different.
Meaning there is here, a complete differentiation between a mechanism which I call the female mechanism and the male mechanism. And I think that after we observe this and read so many studies about it, it really shows about the biological, structural, hormonal differences, everything. But there is no study that talks about the essence. Why we are created as opposites? What’s the essence of these two mechanisms and how are we supposed to connect? What is this attractive force that tries to connect between us? It would appear as if it would be much easier for me to get along with the mechanism that is similar to me. I get along better with my type, my sex, and why do I need this other thing?
Dr. Laitman: No, no, continue. This is actually a very true point.
Nitzah: Because seemingly I live in peace with women that talk the same language, that understand...
Dr. Laitman: Women understand you well?
Nitzah: Yes, we talk and we feel each other. We kind of, sometimes we do not even have to have men.
Dr. Laitman: For men by the way, it is much less. Men do not understand. Therefore they go into struggles and all kinds of things; from a lack of understanding. They are very dispersed in all kinds of directions, each of them. They are more individualists. Women are kind of more organized into one line in life.
Nitzah: Right. Now we will get into all kinds of different pans of it because we see that there are many things that are very special attributes for women than men. For example, women are very empathic. They have a very easy connection to feelings, to emotions. But in order to do this, also to calculate… I watched a comedy, a short film that is running on Youtube, I think many people watched it, and he explained that he put like a brain of a woman and a brain of a man and he said, “Let’s talk about the man’s brain.” It is built in the form of boxes. You take a box out and you talk only to that box. And in general there is only one switch; it is either on or off. A woman’s brain – everything is connected to everything. It is like everything is wired--this is connected to this, this is connected to that and everything is connected to everything. And there is some immense difference. And therefore as a result of that there is also the conflicts and the lack of ability for us to...
Dr. Laitman: The conflicts are not from that. The conflicts are from a lack of the right connection, a lack of mutual understanding. That is already something else. Because the conflicts can be only under the condition that I initially do not take into account the differences between us, that it is impossible, all in all, to erase them.
Meaning, it cannot ever be that I will understand a woman. Truly like that. As the way that she understands her or different women do. I will never be able to call myself in her. And the same thing, a woman in a man, ever. But, if we know this and understand this and accept it, these discernments and these differences, and we go to correct, not erase this gap, but despite it, to be connected, then it is already a different life. This is possible. It is even two different contradictory things. You can build a system between them which will adapt them relatively.
Nitzah: It is interesting that the connections seemingly between similar is more natural, but the connection between different ones is more challenging on one hand, but it also, when we succeed doing it in a good way, it also brings more pleasure, more happiness, more love. There is a certain sensation of two opposites that somehow bring up. But maybe the first question, what are these two systems that are so different, and what is the importance of these two systems?
Dr. Laitman: That is the simplest. I am willing to answer that. We are talking about creation, which is the desire to enjoy. The desire to enjoy and receive pleasure and filling and pleasures. Well, technically just like the brain researchers talked. So we are egotistical; each of us wants to receive fulfillment. These fulfillments have to bring pleasure to me. What is pleasure to me is called filling. And what is not pleasure and interesting to me is called suffering.
So my whole existence moves between pleasure and suffering. Therefore, that is why I am...Because I am between these two, I respond. I give responses. I want this and I do not want that. And you, and the cell that feels either pleasure or suffering, is called the cell of life. Simple. In my definition, let’s say. So this is called the cell of life. It is not a biological cell, specifically. It is not that it belongs to some other mechanism, but it is the emotional cell. The pleasure and my decision, what and how much I differentiate between the two, and how much I run away from suffering and am attracted towards pleasures. According to the level and how much I differentiate between the pleasures and the sufferings, run from the sufferings and am drawn to the pleasures, I call this cell in levels of still, vegetative, animate and speaking.
Meaning, actually this is our whole life. What is the difference between all these levels, between all the creatures, between all the inanimate objects, all the vegetation, all the animate and people? The differences are in the essence of this cell that differentiates between pleasures and sufferings and as much as I differentiate. In what degrees or levels I differentiate between pleasures and sufferings, in what quality I do that. In all of my feelings, in all of my senses--sight, hearing, smell, taste and tactile--there are other people and other things that happen in the degree of vegetative and animate, but all in all, no matter what, wherever I go, there are less and more developed. Also in plants and in animals and in people, it is all according to different levels and forms of qualities of different kinds, different fashions of it. But it is all that same cell, which differentiates suffering and pleasure and to what measure it is sensitive to the differences between them.
It is like a computer memory which is all in all built from cells that are zero and one. We are built from those cells. Pleasure or suffering, and do I differentiate. And this is associated with my senses, meaning we have in our mind, men in our brain, many smell cells which truly cover our whole brain. And we probably needed it once. Today, smells, who knows. There are such animals that can feel ten miles away that there is some animal there or something, and so on. But, in other words, behind every single sense, many cells stand behind it which are associated with that sense. And after they differentiate in those senses, they differentiate also whether it is pleasure or suffering, and then from that I start to make a certain decision in how much and to what degree, how much I need to distance myself from these sufferings and how much it is worthwhile for me to be drawn to these pleasures, what energies I need to do to make this work, and so on and so forth.
Meaning, this is as much as my mind goes into work. Meaning after this cell which differentiates, where there also is a “mind in a brain mechanism” that needs to differentiate and compare between them. Later, I need to do a comparison in how dangerous it is and how attractive it is, and it fills me. And this is also all associated with my environment. How much my environment appreciates this or not. Meaning there are many details here and conditions and data that later my mind can calculate: how much to operate in this or not, to get far from sufferings or even to come close to pleasure, what do I need to do for this, how much it will cost me and forces, and so on. Meaning, our mind, altogether, serves running from suffering and coming closer to pleasures, all in all. It serves the desire. And that is how it is built in everything.
When I look at this cup for example, it is a white color. And this table is the color brown. I do not look and see white and brown. Only, I have a certain feeling, and the suffering and the pleasure towards the white and brown. And that is how I differentiate. Even though brown is always brown and white is always white, but I receive it never the less through my feelings. How pleasant or not pleasant it is for me, because my general sense behind my sights, smell, hearing, taste and tactile, still come down to my feeling of whether it is pleasurable or suffering. I cannot completely be objective, not dependent on anything like I am some kind of machine, I check something and define how this thing is giving, I do not know, a great light or a smaller light, deep color or not; rather I check everything after I stand behind this mechanism, even according to my mood for that day. Even to that point it changes, we know.
That, say people that engage in photography and film, there are days where they say, “I can’t film.” What are you standing behind that camera? What do you care? Even in still photography that is seemingly simple. No, if I am taking a picture, I need to put my emotions in it. The camera can feel me to the point that they cannot even understand themselves, they cannot differentiate themselves from their mind, from their emotions. Rather, everything is together.
Why did I give this whole introduction? Because if we are talking about the male mind and the female mind, then of course here, because our feelings, our emotion, our desire to enjoy, the general desire to enjoy, in men and women are so different, then definitely the minds of men and women which are behind these desires to enjoy, are accordingly very different. Very different.
How is the desire to enjoy of a male different? It is not that a man and a woman see different things, but how I decide and how I feel and how I relate to it and how I compare these things. Everything is completely different in my intellectual work as well as it is in a woman’s work. Meaning that the mind is working according to a different program, different software. There are certain things that you can replace between men and women, but the truth is, that we do not know yet, how much even in the body cells there is a difference. Nevertheless, in the organs and definitely in the brain, which is the server of our desire, which is our foundation.
Nitzah: And what is this basic discernment of the will to receive which is different in a male or in a female, in a man or a woman? They both want to enjoy, that is common to them. What are the differences between what we relate to these things?
Dr. Laitman: This stems from a system that is even more supreme, more upper, that in the end of our development we need to complete each other. And hence for our completion, our making each other up, will be very special, very high, whole, eternal. So it will be able to include within it, this common system. The whole world will be included and maybe all the world.
Therefore, this system has to be very extreme in these two parts, male and female, man and woman. Because all in all, in the connection between them, such intense, deep, endless differences, these two minds need to be so contradictory, so different, so opposing. Opposing systems. I would say even endless fashions within each and every one of them.
Meaning there is nothing in each of them that they are truly complete. And if they truly do complete together, it is amazing. And I am saying that because they understand how much they cannot, and therefore, they complete. Meaning there is a certain concealment between man and woman, because he thinks, “Oh she thinks like me,” and she thinks, “He thinks like I do.” But if it were truly to be revealed how much they do not think together in the same way, then they would not ever agree or be able to become close to each other. They would not be able to.
And as much as we will grow onwards together, more and more, we will discover at a time when we truly get closer to the internality of man and woman-and I hope that from this generation onwards this process will start--then we will discover how much we are more and more different but with that we will have a mind, a feeling, an understanding, an awareness and patience and an ability to complete each other. But this completion will give birth from two of us. One man. One human.
Nitzah: So, I understand now, I really understood that the structure of the mind is a servant. Meaning it serves a certain need that is higher than it. And this force is a desire to differentiate between pleasure and suffering. So what is the differentiation between what a man enjoys and what a woman enjoys?
Dr. Laitman: A woman enjoys from her building for herself, a home. We will call it a home. Itis something that belongs to her. It is a place of control, that belongs to her. And in this she feels herself as covering him, controlling him. Not letting her borders enter into anyone. And actually she needs the man to supply for her what she needs inside these borders, these boundaries.
Nitzah: What does a man enjoy?
Dr. Laitman: A man enjoys when he runs in all kinds of directions, discovers the world, disperses himself in all sorts of interesting things, as much as possible, far from this place that is called home. I am saying this seriously. And it is like he has no belonging, no association with this. But, the two of them are built in such a way that this cannot be without that. Therefore, all in all, in the end, one needs the other.
Man is more associated with game, with adventure. He is interested in things that are more virtual, let us say. He breaks through to all kinds of directions, all kinds of worlds. He has interests. He is also more creative than women because of this. Anything new attracts him. He pounces anything new he wants, like a child. And a woman, we see about girls, that they want more the dolls and all kinds of things like that, together with all kinds of their small things. In short, the foundation of the now life, the present life, is a woman. Breaking out above time and place, is the man. That are the qualities.
Nitzah: And these two desires, actually because of this, there is this very big difference between the male brain and the female brain, because each brain is supposed to serve a different type of desire.
Dr. Laitman: But they cannot exist one without the other, and therefore, other than the sexual attraction, though this too is a problem because a woman is attracted, a woman gets used, it is like a certain acquisition, like a home, she wants to acquire the man. She wants for him to be hers for sure, she wants to bind him. And a male actually is not attracted to that. He is not feeling a certain compulsion or obligation. Although he also wants a woman as a control, as an acquisition; the fact that he acquired her, it is less. It is more than I can control her; for him, control is pride and honor.
Nitzah: That he conquers her? This conquering and then later already it is not important what happens with it, supposedly?
Dr. Laitman: Yes. And therefore they are in completion of each other. A struggle and a completion.
Nitzah: Also from the studies that I read, I saw that really the mechanism in the brain that is responsible for these sexual drives is twice as big in a male than in a female.
Dr. Laitman: No. A man is directed to simple sex. To him it is sex that is not connected to family or to love or to emotions. To him, sex is something that is completely just – it is just sex. It is some manner of receiving pleasure in a certain way. For a woman, no. For a woman it is associated with emotions, with who and in what way, who is he for me and who am I for him. It is a very broad mechanism and very – as a male I say, complex – but it is very refined. And therefore, it is, again, we can say like we said in the beginning of our discussion, that we cannot understand each other. There is no chance what so ever to understand, to complete, to come to something. Rather what happens again is what we talked about concealment. That because of the concealment, we are in a state that this concealment helps us to calm the winds and complete and continue.
Nitzah: Meaning concealment is a certain lack of awareness, you could say?
Dr. Laitman: I am saying concealment is our salvation. That we are truly not aware how different we are. How much we do not understand each other, do not see each other, and yet, we make each other up. Now, in animals it happens in a very simple manner. There is no matter of emotions there, but rather everything is a calculation. Emotions are associated only at the degree of humans, the degree of speaking. For animals it is a calculation. It is worthwhile for me to couple with her and I want to couple with him because our offspring will come out in a good and a best healthy possible way. That is how it happens in nature. In nature it is simple. There are no emotions which confuse us. We do not look at the beauty. What appears to us as beautiful, that it is, “Ah, there is this beautiful lion.” Actually a lioness, she has nothing in that. There actually the males are more beautiful than the females, in the degree of animal. It is not that they see the beauty like we do. It is completely not that thing. What we associate with their beauty is...
Nitzah: What is the difference really? What is the difference between the way that we associate beauty to an external way and the way we as people look, we really, the beautiful sex is considered the woman, but...
Dr. Laitman: Well, beauty is always considered in the male in nature because of subjugation to the female. There is no more than that. And it used to be with us also like that. We need to understand that throughout all times, the matter of the external form, let us say, was the least of the measures in choosing a spouse or a couple. It was either a matter of money, control, of family closeness, social standings. But the beauty was something that only in the latest era,from the renaissance and onwards, it started becoming something. Or what we call romantic novels, about those times, we think that they engaged in that. It completely was not like that. It is just like they would look at the fatter and the healthier she is, it is a sign that the home will be good and that is it. They looked in a very practical, simple manner at things. And she also looked at how strong he is and will he be able to provide, or how rich he is, or how much he belongs to some elite, or something. But only in such a way it was. And they never would choose these or those; rather the father or the family. And in general it was very simple and clear; like in animals. That they chose like that, that is how it was in humankind. There was no resistance and all these romantic novels that they write and all that, it simply was for the elites that did not have what else to do in life. And for the regular people, that was not at all an issue.
Nitzah: Today, actually in this way, we see that still mainly the men are drawn to the external looks, whereas women look more first of all at the internality, something more internal something more that fits. Of course external appearance is important, but it is less. For a female, of course there is..it is like true opposites in the attraction – it is very interesting to see. What is interesting to see is also there are many many discernments that it would be interesting for me to see how these contradictions in the end manage to complete each other. How do they do it?
Dr. Laitman: They cannot and therefore we see that, just as we see a crisis in all that men engage in--the economy, the education, and so on and so forth--we have a crisis also in the family and in general in the identity of man and women as they are being confused and they are mixing these discernments. What is male, what is female? Women go out to work and become managers and also prime ministers and men lose their force and they are willing to sit at home and everything is receiving some unclear form, seemingly unnatural, because we are in a crisis, also in that. And therefore, all these ways of ours are very limited.
Nitzah: Meaning, you are saying something like this: there is the man and the woman, there is men and there is women, but in our story of life, it is getting more and more complicated. And a woman looks at, because I have a female mind, today it operates and...
Dr. Laitman: Today, it is very unclear, truly.
Nitzah: And this is very true. Studies are showing today that not necessarily there is a connection between the sex that one was born with and his mind. Meaning that he could be a woman that has a very male thought and behavior, or there could be a man that is very emotional and...
Dr. Laitman: We see it also how they are realizing in their lives. And this is because we have come to a social life that is broken. Such that we lost that status of a man and that status of a woman. It is not clear. We came to some kind of unisex that it is not this and not that and each can replace the other, and this mixture, this inner mixture, this intermixture, between the sexes made our…
You know in many languages, the word teacher is a man. In many languages there is no thing as a female teacher. A doctor, it is doctor, it is a male doctor. What is a female doctor? Meaning, such professions, like a musician, a pianist. In Hebrew the female pianist is kind of not clear, it is something that not too long ago, let’s say the last 200 years, it just was not even acceptable in human society. And today, you have a captain on a ship is a woman, the prime minister is a woman, there is a minister that is a woman, and I am not even talking about teachers and managers that are all, the teachers are almost all female.
Meaning men and women have truly kind of been corrupted from all this and they also educated by women. We talked about this a lot in some of our programs, that the main thing that changes a person is the environment. Well what environment do I have as a man if above me there is a woman? Not that I am, G-d forbid, disregarding women, but I need to get an example from a man. As I grow in the kindergarten,in the school, I need to see a man that is giving, that is his image, his example.
The truth is, I remember from all my teachers in school, only two – one from mathematics and one for history. They were men. And I remember that from them I received a lot, whereas I do not remember what I received or what I was impressed by my female teachers, because all the rest were women teachers. There is a certain...It is very, very much felt if a man teacher or a woman teacher is standing before you, and for a child it is a disaster because, I remember that when we went on from this without realizing the differences. Of course, the inclination for this crisis was hastened for us, which we needed to reach. But all together, this hastened our ripeness to understand that we are not in the right way, on the right path.
Therefore today, in our times, we are in a state that it is a big problem. And, nevertheless, the problem is that also our mind is changing and our desires are changing. Meaning, we have come to a state that is called a crisis. That the external conditions, as we have corrupted ourselves by intermingling external systems, it operates on the inner structure of our mind, on the inner structure of our desires. And we seemingly are going with these corruptions into man, into human beings. And if I were to develop according to nature in a normal egotistical way, like a man and you, let’s say, as a woman, today we would be inside, truly flawed. Each entered into his nature a very big flaw by external systems that are intermixed. And this is actually the essence of the crisis.
Nitzah: I will go back over this in my words. If we said that there is a system before that is upper, that you called it the will to enjoy, and based on this system there is the female mind and the male mind, and the mind is, all in all, a serving thing...
Dr. Laitman: Also the will to enjoy and the will to enjoy of the male and female, and also the mind that serves this in that.
Nitzh: So it is completely two complete different systems. And so what happened is that the environment stabilized and established my mind, actually it…
Dr. Laitman: Well we would get one environment.
Nitzah: But each would see differently, each would absorb his part...
Dr. Laitman: Yes. But because in this environment we started to intermix, and just as I gave an example from education, we got examples from the other sex and entered it in with force, into himself. Men mostly where harmed from this and not women. And so it works out that both their desires and also their minds were already flawed, broken, because they took upon themselves forms of women.
Nitzah: It is interesting what you just said now, also that the externality influenced the internality, but you also said that the female brain is more dominant
Dr. Laitman: This is what we see, that all in all, we are really pushing women forward, also men are agreeing to that.
Nitzah: One of the things I read that was very interesting, and this is one of the researches that talks about the studies of the emotions, that actually when the mind was created in the womb, for the first few weeks, it is first of all female and then after the adding of the male hormones after the eighth or ninth week, it starts to get the form and shape of the brain of a male. But the first choice is the female brain. Is this connected somehow to what you said before?
Dr. Laitman: Because the ego completely is called after a woman. And in a man the ego works seemingly altruistically. It does not want to absorb or to acquire, it wants to spread, it wants to run, it wants distances. It is not necessarily physically, but in an idea form, in a creative form. He needs something that gives, something new. A man enjoys innovation and games. And for a woman, the games are very clear, how they start, that is how they finish, in a way that nothing has to be new. The game itself is good. For a man, no. He needs results from the game. He needs to know what is known and what I attain. For a woman, no. A woman that knows what will be in the end, she is fine with that, she is good with that. She enjoys the process. The man does not enjoy the process; only from the result.
Nitzah: Yes, we can really see this in a very, we see that women likes processes and that is why she likes to talk about it.
Dr. Laitman: And the clearer it is what it is going to be in the end, is better for her also, because she enjoys from that. And a man completely for him, it is not, what do I need to be in that at all, in that case.
Nitzah: One of the most emphasized male attributes is the matter of competition and the games and sports That is why men like so much games- football, sports – the result is not known in advance and this causes a certain excitement. When you described it, it seemed like there are two different materials. Like one wants to conglomerate and the male that wants to break out actually, to disperse. So it is like truly two opposites, two elements that are truly working in a true opposite manner.
Now, but I heard you say many times that our thought has to become more round lately and now we are in a period where the – usually a round thought is associated to a more female thought, where she takes into account also the logical part of the intellectual and also the experiential mind. How does this connect?
Dr. Laitman: No. I talked only about the flawing in this, how the corruption in this. That men are losing, through education, through systems, this pluralism, that everything is equal and equality and in clothing we are not different from each other, and behavior. We see in bars and pubs, women. Would a cowboy walk into a bar and see women? Excuse my French, but he would see prostitutes there. And where would you see that in some kind of a thing? Today it is completely equal, it is for everyone. So it is, of course, weakening the men. The male side is truly getting destroyed. And this is a problem.
But, after we talked a lot about the materialism of a woman and the breaking out of a man, the most emphasized, it is clear to us, is in the corporeal, in the physical manner. Even in our sexual parts. The spiritual result of how each acts, behaves, in that act, in that same thing, it is a summary of the desire for a man to break out and of a woman’s desire to absorb and swallow.
So, what I talked about the flaw, about the corruption, I truly talked about the corruption that there is a certain inclusion in this sexual part. And we see that this is how much the male part has weakened and is losing his standing, and hence, from here we see problems with the single parent families, divorce. A man does not get in the family what he would expect from that side of his nature to receive. In short, we have lost many things here. Though there is no bad without good; we are progressing to the understanding of the crisis and from here to the correction.
Oren: You talk a lot about the nature of man; that it was corrupted and the structure of his brain and his desires.
Dr. Laitman: Well this is also according to studies.
Oren: From my impression, you look at things in a very male point of view.
Dr. Laitman: No. There is also the change that has been through the male part and on the female part. The brain, the male is more sensitive more weak than a woman. A woman is closer to nature. A male is above nature, kind of floating. All the external things influence him greatly. A woman, because she is closer to nature, because she must also be during the period of pregnancy and birth and childbirth, is much more fundamental, more solid and stable. Whereas a man? No. And the fact that he is strong physically, with his strength, he is not strong in survival. In this force of patience, in the force of, wherever we need a long, precise, meticulous work, and precise work, man does not have those attributes. He is ready for breaking out. He is a hero for a short period of time.
Nitzah: He does not have the patience, or the persistence?
Dr. Laitman: No, not at all. Very quickly he loses interest or his ability to deal with things at all. Rather, there needs to be a woman that holds on and supports and directs just like a woman, like a mother, and then it succeeds.
Oren: So, you are saying that men absorb from the mix between the sexes. I am looking at it at a certain zoom-out, from afar. Meaning throughout history there used to be very clear sexes, men and women, just like with animals in nature and so on, until they start to corrupt. And then you said, about more or less, 200 years...
Dr. Laitman: Even more than that.
Oren: A few hundred years ago certain mix occurs between men and women and then this weaker more sensitive part called the man absorbs the things and then his male nature gets corrupted. Now, throughout nature we actually looked at it, even from the angle that you look at it is very male. What happens in the female type in this whole process?
Dr. Laitman: The female form, even though it blows all these issues, she deals with it. From the ego, because a woman absorbs everything into her, because from her nature she scrutinizes everything within her, she absorbs things, she receives things. And therefore, just like we, in our guts, in our intestines, we digest things and absorb from them good things and repel the bad things, the refuse, then the same thing happens in her. That, though she absorbs all the things that are in the environment, in the society and everything, but her programming is very original, is very natural. Which is, I need a man that will supply for me all my needs, so I will be able to give birth to children, so they will develop and everything will be good for them and okay in a good and certain secure way. This original program is not flawed or almost not flawed at all. And with all the bad things that she absorbs, she can expel them in a way of refuse. A man does not have such a mechanism.
Nitzah: It sounds pretty concerning what you are describing. It is like there is a certain destruction of a male mechanism and I also understand that it is how we are destroying a certain mechanism.
Dr. Laitman: Yes, of course.
Nitzah: First of all the question is what do we do now? Let us say, we understand this, that we somehow, because of our culture and our education, we are destroying this element.
Dr. Laitman: No, this is part of the crisis, so that we will understand in such a way, we are coming to a certain very big inflation of human society. Meaning, as far as we get further away from nature, we advance into a negative place, into a bad place.
Nitzah: What does it mean that we are distancing ourselves from nature?
Dr. Laitman: Well, nature is as close as we were to the degree of animal. As the more that we want to progress to the speaking type, we become a minus speaking and not the plus speaking. We develop in a direction from the degree of animate.
Oren: You mean that we were once apes and that we were male and female?
Dr. Laitman: Yes, and then everything was healthy, clear, there were no differences, there were no arguments, who she is and who I am. Everything was in its place. There were no questions. And also, there were no questions, more or less, in those primitive forms that, you know, in the beginning of the human development. And later, already it was maybe also not so much a problem, because we developed according to the values of money, strength, force, control, social relations, social standings. It was still clear more or less – I am associated with a certain caste or a certain level. So, I cannot get married with someone that is more than me and also I will not get married with someone who is less than me. I have to get married with someone who is equal to me. And in general, they would get married with their relatives, with their cousins. It is called “you would search for your cousins.” Yes, that was customary like that. There is the sister and after the sister, there is one more, one more level of distancing – the cousin, the daughter of the brother and the sister of your parents. That is how they used to get married. And why? Because nevertheless, it remains in the family, the assets and the help. That is how it was customary. We developed. We got further away from each other. We already developed also in the quantity of people. We also developed in distances and in our engagements, and nevertheless, they used to get married only according to that level, only who comes to me. That is it, I cannot jump. No one longs for the princess. And, you cannot jump from degree to degree. If I am a cobbler, then I look between the cobblers first. We go into businesses, we need to survive, we need to live. She belongs to a cobbler, I belong to a cobbler. Okay, this is a good way. And that is how it was to be. And then, they take us into the same business, we broaden it a little bit, we build a house or something like that together, next to her parents or mine, and that is it. And this is how humanity used to develop. It was all clear in other words. Everything was natural. To the new values, but those values were acceptable in the environment without any problems. There was no question about it at all. People did not think that there is in the matter of sex or to get married, with who, yes, and with who, not. And like this, it was like as in animals. It was defined in a simple way. According to a level and according to the boundaries, how much I can or I cannot. I do not travel to look for a woman along the ways and I go into some villages, into some cities – no way. There is no such thing. That was not even on the topic, it was not subject matter. The subject matter was how do we live, today, tomorrow, the next day. Food, family, first of all.
Oren: And from there we advance to where?
Dr. Laitman: We advance to the middle ages, beyond the middle ages and this renaissance.
Oren: What did it do to the differences between the sexes?
Dr. Laitman: It started to confuse a little bit in the culture, but that was mostly in the elites.
Oren: Where was the bifurcation here, the point?
Dr. Laitman: It was probably the French revolution and those periods. Or that it occurred from the technological development.
Oren: And then what happened between the sexes?
Dr. Laitman: The technological development starts to put confusion between us, because everyone became laborers. Everyone is workers. And then also technicians, also engineers. The technology started to eat us and put us into systems, social systems. New social systems.
Oren: What did it do to the male, to the men type, to the male sex?
Dr. Laitman: It took the man completely out of the home and the family, and also started to take the women type out as well. And it started to process them in such a way that they disconnected from the home. Then kindergartens became, and schools for children, and all kinds of systems, all kinds of such systems, that the definition of the family was destroyed. Because each is running away from the home, all day long. These come home at night. They bring what we have earned. Food, we eat, we lay back in bed and then in the morning once again we run away from the home. Even women, even women. Once it was, we had a home, we worked together in the field next to the cows, next to this, we took care of our children. Meaning, there was something that was clear about where we are. And from the beginning of the industrial revolution, there is confusion.
Oren: Our time is over. I would like one sentence. From this whole confusion between the sexes and this whole change in the perception of the male type, where is it going, in short, in the future?
Dr. Laitman: it is one observation in all the corruptions, in all the flaws in it. We are advancing to such states where this will not be the greatest flaw. We have problems of the environment, of the ecology. We have a problem with the climate and with hunger and where the problems between men and women, is not a small thing; it is the foundation of life, in the end. Will we have families or not? But this is not the main topic.
Oren: So how do you relate to it? Will we have families or not?
Dr. Laitman: I think that the crisis will break out and broaden even before we start asking that.
Oren: What are we finishing with? We have 20 seconds.
Dr. Laitman: Towards man and women, towards the human brain and the male brain and the...
Oren: Well we did not get to that yet, so where are we ending?
Dr. Laitman: To the fact that we need completion, another discussion. We need completion, but it will come after the recognition of evil and the decision to correct to good.
Oren: Thank you very much, Dr. Michael Laitman. Our time is over. Thank you, Nitzah. Thank you, too, for being with us. We are looking for completion. Be with us in our next discussion. A good life, A New Life.
(End of the Conversation)