http://files.kabbalahmedia.info/download/files/eng_t_rav_2012-12-27_program_haim-hadashim_n122.mp4

A Talk with Rav

A New life

Talks on the New World of Work

Talk 122

Talk December 27, 2012 - before editing

Oren: Hello and thank you for joining us to the series of talks "A New Life" with Dr. Michael Laitman and Nitzah Mazo. In the current series of "A New Life," we are discussing the new world of work, where we spend most of our time and years. This is the very central part in our life. We’d like to learn the integral approach to life that Dr. Laitman has been teaching us, and how it is expressed in all levels of our lives and how it is expressed in our work life

So we know that what we do for work defines who we are for ourselves, towards the people around us, and towards our status in society. There are many ways in which it influences us, and a really integral approach will take us to a better place, to a new life. So Nitzah, why don’t you direct us and open the discussion of the meaning of work in our lives.

Nitzah: Like you said at the beginning, a place of work isn’t just a place to earn income It is a place where we want to fulfill ourselves and express ourselves. In speaking about the newer generation, we see that on the one hand they don’t want to be slaves, and on the other hand it is very important for them to fulfill themselves at their place of work. In fact, you could say that they don’t see any other place to fulfill themselves, except for the world of work. And this is also the way they look at the world of work, asking, “How much does this place of work help me to fulfill myself?”This approach creates many situations because many times a person would change their place of work quickly, if they see they don’t advance fast enough. They will make that change. It’s a very great power that changes the way young people address work these days. How can one be fulfilled, and where does this impulse to fulfill yourself through work come from?

Where else could one fulfill themselves in life? We just don’t have a life. I know that I work all year and I take some vacations. I’m working throughout my entire life. I go home just to eat and sleep, to shower, change, and go to work once again. I only come home to rest, and to change clothes. It’s like a break from work to change clothes. So, why shouldn’t I think of my job as a place to fulfill myself and as my entire life?

How can we do without it? I see it in myself. Though I have a special profession, still how would I not work? Will I go home and just sit there? What will I do with myself?

Oren: One would die within a year.

Of course. What would I do? Maybe I would go on a trip, or get a dog and walk it? What can you do? A person who is working has a routine, and for him, it means that he’s alive. And we see that workplaces also make sure to fill a person’s free time, since they organize trips with colleagues and employees, so our entire lives revolves around work. On the other hand, even though a person is dedicated to his job, it is hard to say that he is fulfilled by it, since people feel great emptiness. So we are in a very multifaceted transition where I’m not fulfilled by my job, but still I feel that I belong to it. And even though I change jobs many times, I don’t find anything better anywhere else and somehow, I surrender.

I don’t think there is a lot to talk about here because people don’t really determine anything here. Here, the concept is whatever we need for life determines how much we work. We see hundreds of millions of people leaving work and not going back because there won’t be any workplaces, and this will determine the new form of man’s attitude towards work, life, and society. Therefore I really see no hope of anything changing in current workplaces or in people at their current workplaces. Suddenly we will see that 70-80% of society is out of work. When I am saying no work, I don’t mean no income. The governments or social security will be able to supply that in some way, but a person who wants to fulfill himself in some way will want to feel he is doing something, that he is in some sort of process, that he is productive, and has the feeling that he is alive. And if he is thrown out of a job, even if he is given the same income, this is called that he is outside of life.

And so I’m not really taking into consideration one’s fulfillment with the job itself, at the moment when one finds himself outside his place of work, I want to see how that will influence him. This is where we should see this as a very critical point in a person’s life, in our dissemination, and especially in workshops that we do through television and internet. How do we supply people with the kind of development that they didn’t find at work and, of course, can’t find now because they are without a job, don’t have anything to occupy themselves and are without a future because they don’t see a future? And here, through our education, we need to bring a person to this new future, this new challenge.

Oren: You are talking about programs for the unemployed.

It’s not just for people out of work.

Oren: We have developed programs for the unemployed. But now we want to do something else, we want to talk about the meaning of work. Classify it for a moment.

There are people who are working and those who are not working. For those who are not working, we need to treat them, and we’ve developed a lot of programs for them. And even today, we see that there is more than 50% unemployment in places like Greece and we have developed programs for that. We have even turned to them and offered them those programs. But, that’s not enough. Ok, but I don’t want to talk about that right now because there is an even greater number of people in the general public who are working and whom we can help even more. Let’s talk about the present for a moment.

Today a person is working. He gets up in the morning, he goes to work, and arrives at his job. For example, you are a working person and so is Maya and is Nitzah. We get up for work, and we want to find fulfillment and be satisfied with what we do. And what does it depend on? Because I see that in the career changes I have made in my life, it doesn’t really have to do with the salary I receive or with what I am doing. It has a lot to do with the relationships at my job. For example, people I work with can make me happy or they can make me very miserable. Today the interactions that we see between people are interactions that are becoming worse and worse and worse from day to day and year to year. The interactions at work or on the job are becoming worse.

So for example, I invited one of the people I know to watch our shows and he said: “Where are you guys living? The hatred inside organizations and between people who are working together is at such a crazy level. It seems there is no connection between this cooperation, and connection that you guys are thinking of bringing to the atmosphere that actually exists between people in organizations.”

So if we could for a moment focus on this field of people who are already working and the state of their relationships at the job. Do you understand where I’m aiming us towards? I’d like to talk about the meaning of work and different aspects of, for example, relationships at the job.

So let me ask a question. Today a person invests so much energy in choosing the right occupation. And like you said before, he changes this occupation a number of times during his life and he invests a lot less effort into the relationships at his job. How much do you think is the percentage of the importance of choosing the right occupation? The personal choice that I make, how much does that determine my satisfaction with work or is it the interactions with people around me even if it is not the right job for me, percentage-wise and why also? You haven’t answered me yet. What’s more powerful, my fit?

I don’t know your fit because it depends on how developed you are socially.

Oren: I don’t understand. Each person chooses his occupation.

So each one chooses his occupation, so what?

Oren: Sometimes it takes years for a person to understand what they want to study, and at the end of the day they study something. But then there are all kinds of things that happen in people’s lives that make them unhappy, even if they chose something that they like, it’s hard for them to be happy. What is the factor that is most dominant? Is it the profession that I choose being right for me or my interactions with the people around me?

It depends on the person. If I’m just an egoist, then if I can use the people around me, then I’ll feel even better if I can use them. And if I’ve gone through integral education, then I’m very concerned about the place where I work. It depends on how warm the society is and that I don’t want to leave it. I don’t know how to weigh it, and I don’t understand how you want me to give you an answer, or what kind of answer I can give you.

Before giving people the integral education, a person measures himself according to his personal success and how much he can control others. Once he has received integral education, his values change. He then begins to see the environment to the extent that it’s warm and supportive. This is what gives him pleasure and gives him tools for success. Thirty, sixty _______ is something else at the social relationships. He doesn’t really care if he has a high rank or low rank, because we are going from this linear direction to the integral direction and the measurements are completely different. So you can’t compare. One’s a square, and the other one is a circle.

Nitzah: I’d like to sharpen this question, because I feel there is something groundbreaking here. Because a person always thinking where is the place of my fulfillment, where I can fulfill myself. Is it my job where I can bring my abilities?

No, I don’t think so at all. I can answer that right away, because a person at the job doesn’t really feel satisfied by his work, because it’s repetitive and it’s all nonsense. He sees the world, and it’s not that he didn’t see anything before and thought that his workplace was everything. Today he can see that there are other things, even though he is so busy at work and it’s doesn’t allow him to do other things. The workplace is full of bad relationships, pressures and there’s nothing he can do.

On the other hand, if the relationships improve and the atmosphere becomes friendly, then he’ll be happy and fulfilled. It doesn’t matter what we play out of it, the most important thing is to do it together, maybe it’s a competitive game, but we do it together. That’s the whole point; to make a game, to play at work, because the game is the connection between everybody. And if you want not to be together, for each one to be...

Nitzah: Everybody wants to be in their own corner and then the job becomes even worse than slavery. So then, place of my fulfillment is in our connections. This is really something that could be different because I have no doubt that people want to fulfill themselves, but they don’t know where their place of fulfillment is. And here you gave us a new angle. My place of fulfillment is not just my job and the profession that I have, it’s in the network of ties and connections between us. So here I would like for you to elaborate. What does it mean to fulfill myself and society?

It’s important for me to be in society, at my place of work, and it needs to be a warm place of work. And this, first of all, is my primary source of fulfillment and satisfaction. However much we manufacture or succeed in manufacturing, that’s secondary. The specialty of the manager of the job is how to connect these two components so that the connection between the workers will give them the motivation to make whatever it is the organization makes, whether it is an assembly line or something more to do with computers, sewing, or whatever. But, the connection between them will bring better production and success with the results of the job itself, and the connection will bring a better result.

Oren: How does he to do that?

That will be his specialty; how to tie these two things together.

Oren: But can you expand on that, can you give him some tips?

That’s called a successful manager. We can give all kinds of rewards for it. Say, if you’ve done well, then you can go on vacation or after six months of exceptionally good work, you can go on a trip for all the families together. We do this because we want to be together. It’s an expression.

Nitzah: There is a different goal here because today, the rewards are for the workers to produce more products and be more productive.

No here, the work will cause the connection, and the connection will motivate the work itself.

Oren: I’d like to ask. Let’s say I’m the manager of the job, and until now I always wanted to fit the worker with the role that will suit him. It seems that everyone has all the conditions to be the best; however, they beat each other up.

Exactly.

Oren: So let’s say I’m their manager. And there is nothing I can do. I’m not able to overcome the stresses, since whatever you do, it just moves from place to place. It’s not enough that everybody suffers from this negativity, And as the person in charge of the scene, I can’t make sense of it. And, you’re telling me what I have to make two things work together. What are they? First of all, make them connected. I understand that I have these two goals in front of my eyes: One of them is for them to be connected and the other is for them… for that’s the result of them succeeding at their job, because they are capable, they are able to do it.

Let’s say I have to develop something new, and it’s like everything is blocked. And now when I take this line of connecting these things together, what can I do as a manager, keeping in my mind, may be as a compass, tips on what I should or shouldn’t do? How can I make and fulfill this promise of where I’ll be able to connect these two things together and that will propel my organization forward? Help me out a little bit. Do you understand my problem? I have a capable group of people.

I’d put them in workshops and in these workshops, I will discern all the things that are between them.

Oren: The negative ones?

No, I’m not talking about negative, I’m talking about positive. The workshops will connect them, where we’ll talk about work and where we will heat them up towards connection, mutuality and they will begin to see that it’s all necessary also towards reality, our evolution and all those things. Also, how ego plays around with us, how egoistic we are with each other and each and every one of us separately. At work it’s not them, it’s their ego that’s making them behave this way, so conniving. Let’s have each person look at himself from the side. Who will be more successful? A person who can be a psychologist to himself and see how his ego is working on him and seducing him to oppose the other.

Until it becomes clear to us how we are run from above, that we have no free choice, and we are just like animals that nature is running and operating, except with animals it’s in order to live and with us it’s also in order for us to hate. Then how can we change it? Maybe enjoy what we have? Let’s rise above it. We don’t need to do anything but know how to control our own desires. We don’t need a manager, let’s manage ourselves. Can we do it or can’t we? And again we’ll talk about smiling and talking to each other. Let’s do it as a workshop, as a game. This is how we reach the opening of the heart. Let’s give ourselves bonuses.

Oren: What for?

It doesn’t matter, a weekend together with the manager. If we change our relationships at work, let’s see how much that influences us or doesn’t influence us. If the psychologist comes to us, and we’ve gone through a course of 15 meetings or workshops, how much does that influence us? How much have we changed? May be there is a television that constantly videos us, and somebody checks it and sees how we are progressing, much time it takes us to reach our goals each time, nobody hides anything from everybody else or stops anybody in their tracks. And then as a result, everybody can go on vacation with their families so that families will also be able to connect. They’ll buy presents for the kids, send flowers to their wives, go home to their wives, all kind of such things, you know, little tips. They do, but they do it in a formal way without actually changing people.

Nitzah: I’d like to tie these two concepts together that we talked about with the concept of connecting people and the concept of self fulfillment, because I feel there is something new here. Fulfillment within connection is something very special, because what is the greatest fear when you go and tell people “let’s connect?” Each person is worried and concerned about finding where he is special, where he is best, and what his talent is. There is always this fear that unity and sameness sound the same, and if I connect, I’ll be a small cog in the system and I’ll be swallowed up inside and I don’t want to be. I want to keep my uniqueness and my fulfillment inside this connection. How do I do that? There’s this question mark.

A person needs to be sure that when he loses himself inside society, this doesn’t have him lose anything, and he only gains by it. What do you mean “he loses himself in society”? If he is not constantly trying to stick out egoistically but is acting towards social connection, this helps him ascend and not the opposite. I remember I worked at some place many years ago and only I knew how to do a number of things and I didn’t tell anybody about them. It happens in every organization, right? And the opposite. Sometimes I made manipulations so that others won’t be able to do without me and only when I came...

Oren: I was the only one who was able to save the day. This happens every day at every place. What do we do? That’s the question.

What we do is very simple, but you can’t jump from here to these new relationships if you don’t have a person go through this internal change. How can you? He will not be able to keep things to himself, he will be afraid to participate and cooperate, but it happens after this inner change.

Oren: What is the process?

Workshops.

Oren: Of course. Workshops are a tool. But you said you keep information to yourself. What is the emotional process that you need to go through as a person? Let’s say we’ve come to an organization where you work and to the team with which you work. What kind of emotional process do you need to go through for you to be willing to come out of your bunker?

We don’t tell a person in advance what we need to go through.

Oren: No, we‘re not telling him, we just want you to describe this process for us.

We’ll tell him we’ll have him see that his contribution to society will be very important to him.

Oren: Well, that’s the end of the process. Can you try to go into the shoes of that person you were then? Yes, well what process...let’s say Nitzah and I came to the organization where you worked and we wanted to improve your life there, what process would we have needed to have you go through and what emotional stations would you have needed to go through? Don’t say workshops, because that is just a tool. But emotionally, what would you need to go through, what feelings, what insights would you need to reach, so that at the end of the process, you all get to the place where, like you said, the connection and the job will be the two components that will be connected bring each and every person to his highest fulfillment?

As much as I can understand your question, my answer is this. We need to show a person how bad his ego is for him, how much it disconnects him from his life, from success, how much it brings him a lack of security, feelings of rejection, sadness, and so on. If he goes through these stations, he’ll begin to see how good, warm, and safe it feels if he is connected to others

Oren: You are a special person?

We are all special; each one is special, right?

Oren: Right. Is it important for you to maintain this uniqueness?

This is how we create our connection and this is a way in which we all feel ourselves to be special. It’s just like in a body where each organ is important.

Oren: How do you both build…when you had this knowledge that you kept to yourself? It united you.

With the organization?

Oren: No, it made you unique. You were probably 20 something and you knew that there was something that only you knew and you knew this was your place, you were important, everybody needed you. And it’s the same for Nitzah and for me. So, what is this new thing that we are talking about?

Everything is together, everything is common to everyone.

When I contribute to this general play, then I earn it, the entire play becomes mine. I feel this way, and it’s this new feeling that the entire play becomes mine, and you feel that the entire play is yours.

Oren: And also Nitzah feels this way.

Yes, of course.

Oren: So who does the play belong to?

It belongs to everyone, to each and every one and to everyone together. It’s just like when you feel love. It doesn’t divide into parts. If we love each other, then you enjoy loving me. Then why can I not enjoy loving you as well? There is no small amount of bestowal.

Oren: But you lose your power. You are not worth anything anymore, we can exchange you tomorrow. Why did you keep your knowledge to yourself? You didn’t want to exchange it with anyone else, you wanted to safe and that you were needed. It gave you security.

No, this is egoistic security. Tomorrow something will change and I will be tossed away.

Oren: But for now it’s a power, strength, isn’t it? And everybody works and operates this way, and you did this, too. So let’s talk about tomorrow’s work world. We are talking about the world of tomorrow. So let’s say you keep that. What will give you this same security tomorrow?

Let’s say you keep your uniqueness, but you do not hold back the general assembly line and you do not keep your participation from it.

Oren: I don’t understand you. Well, let’s talk about a person’s sense of security. It gave you a sense of security to keep things to yourself, but also now you are keeping things, so what’s different?

But I’m not screwing you over, I’m participating with you, even though it’s only me who knows how to do what I do. At least that as a transition stage, half a step, okay? Until a person doesn’t receive, accept that the circle is everything.

Oren: Ok, let’s leave the circle for a moment. Let’s say everybody is together and cooperating. What does this give you? What is your security now? Before, your private assets, your knowledge gave you security. Now what gives you this power? Because if it’s worse than before, then your life has become worse.

It’s this general participation that gives you security, that’s how it influences a person. This is the only thing that he receives; the only way he receives true security. Many people join me and participate together with me. I’m inside them and with them. This is what happens in part of nature. I don’t want to talk about the upper force that resides within that.

Oren: What do you mean many join me and participate together with me?

We stabilize this common mind and common heart, emotion and knowledge, that is the sum of all of our feelings and thoughts, because each one is integrated with the others. We multiply our assets by infinity.

Oren: How does this influence the feeling of fulfillment of each and every one?

This is how I fulfill myself.

Oren: You fulfill yourself? But you are already integrated with everyone else.

You think I disappear there? By that, I fulfill myself. Suddenly I feel that I have no limits. This is the law of the vessels of the circles, of the integral participation.

Oren: But it’s not even you. Let’s take me. And now you are telling me let’s go round, let’s be rounder, with the crew, with the team. And, to understand, you are the manager and you don’t know how to lead us. Each one is a very capable person. But really you can’t bring them... finally you can’t bring them to any achievements. Now you are saying let’s organize them. And I understand your interest of bringing all of us to a common goal. You’ll be successful, but what about me, Oren, who is a participant in this work team. I don’t understand how I will feel my fulfillment that as an individual, as I am fulfilling myself in this circle, in this team.

What team are you talking about? This is not a team; this is not a work team. It’s a society, it’s a connection, and it’s a group. It’s not a work team; don’t tell me it’s a work team. I look at it not as a team. What a mistake. We are not together as colleagues. No. Over these workshops we are reaching a bond between us, we are already friends.

Oren: And where is Oren as a working man who has a career that he wants to advance to a better place?

He disappears altogether.

Oren: Well, this is what I am asking. How will that help?

You can’t hear what I am saying. We need to bring these people and their participation to such a workshop and group and they’ll feel that it’s not a workplace at all. We are not even talking about a workplace here. We take two hours off of work and now we are in a completely different world, in a connected ,integrated world where everything is good. It’s like we are living in a cloud. We are not talking about work relationships right now, not workers in some department where there is no manager.

Through these workshops we are reaching a state where this is what is important for us and not our work relationships. We talked about how our connection at work influences work and how work influences this. And we need to talk about how the connection between us is what is precious to us, as opposed to work relationships, which will organize themselves according to this connection. They will just fall into place. If we have not succeeded, we have not succeeded. The people begin to value this connection, and if it takes a long time, it will take a long time. With people like you, it will take a long time.

Oren: I’m not talking about work relationships, I am talking about my own fulfillment.

You’ll see throughout the workshops, connection that happens and how people will go from being your colleagues to your friends.

Nitzah: This is social fulfillment actually. And inside the society, let’s say we have the society already… no, not what’s happening with work.

I don’t care about that anymore. We can put songs on at the job, everything in accordance to this connection. Put things in the background in accordance with this connection and aim yourself at this connection. You need to be brainwashed like this for six months, and in six months, we’ll see.

Nitzah: I’m not going to deal with their conflicts or problems?

No, nothing. Go only with the positive.

Nitzah: So from this understanding, we gain connection that will propel us to this state. And if I want to fulfill myself in this social way, is there uniqueness to each and every individual?

No, there isn’t. What uniqueness? Each one is special in annulling himself. Yes, it’s the opposite, because I’m talking about circles here and not lines, not egoistic lines. A circle. And in a circle, the more each person can be in the center of the circle, and then he is the most successful. In the circle, the more each one is closer to the center of the circle determines how successful he is. The farther he is from his ego and the faster and closer he gets to the center of the circle, then he is more successful. But this happens. Before he was on the periphery of the circle, his personal circle and he became distant to that and became closer and closer to the connection with everyone else. And that is called “more successful.”

Oren: And then he feels self-fulfilled?

Yes.

Oren: By what?

By being connected.

Oren: Will also another person feel fulfilled? In what way?

Yes, also in that.

Oren: So it’s not unique to myself, not personal.

Of course it’s personal, because each one will feel fulfilled in himself.

Oren: That’s what I’m asking.

Of course he’ll feel fulfilled. It’s just like when you have a kind of periphery, like a field, and if you… Like when you throw a ball in roulette and in the middle you have a hole. So you go round and round and round, until you fall into the middle of the wheel and that’s the success. And that middle of the circle is where we get new life for me, for Oren and for everybody else. A life of their own.

Oren: You see a person’s self fulfillment in there?

Yes of course, because by that, the individual tends to the entire world.

Oren: Which world?

The entire world. He feels that way. He feels that the entire world is his.

Oren: Where does that feeling come from?

Because he goes from individual reception in his small individual personality, in his own narrow feeling that entire world is his.

Oren: This entire world is in the center of the circle?

And nobody interferes with anybody else, even though we are all there together. The opposite is true. Each one enjoys everybody else being there. This is a new approach, a new perception, and to people will gradually arrive.

Oren: So, say I went through this process and you brought me to this experience or feeling. Let’s say when my alarm clock rings in the morning and I need to go to work, what will I feel? Today I turn it off 10 times before I’m able to drag myself out of bed because I have no other choice. This is what most people that I know also feel. So let’s say the organization where I work, the organization that went through this process of integral education and I fulfill my role in the organization, and each one is in their role. What do we feel when the alarm goes off in the morning?

You feel like you are waking up to life. Remember when you were a kid, how you’d wake up in the morning, jump out of bed in your underwear and run to the yard. “Where are my friends?” You wanted to play immediately, to see the world.

Oren: Yeah, I remember.

Would you have such a thing? Every day. Just like that. You didn’t want to stay in bed another moment. Which is like “click” and you would jump out of bed and look for the world, for your friends. This is how you’ll feel.

Oren: As an adult?

What do you mean adult? You are not such an adult.

Oren: Why?

Because life is before you.

Oren: What life?

Life, the world, such experiences that fill you up like “aaaah,” like that, more than they did in childhood.

Oren: Another situation. What if I go to work in the morning and once I’ve overcome my personal crisis where I need to get out of bed and go, I’ve already done that. Now I’m at work and I begin to see people, people who work with me in the hall, in the coffee corner.

Before you go to work, you already have this new music that you’ve played at your house and good new things that are transmitted to your TV set from work, where they want you to get up in a good way. “Oren, are you ok, are you feeling good? Great work. We are worried about you, we are waiting for you. We’ve made you your coffee.” You go there; you come home to your place. This is your place. This is the integral job and we work integrally on a person. A person needs feel as an embryo, not even as a baby in his mother’s hands, but as an embryo in his mother’s womb to be supported from all sides, and to know that he is cared about and everybody accepts him and wants him. This is the purpose of building the good environment, the correct future environment. Even though we are adults, and we need to add things of ourselves, society is still functioning as a womb.

Oren: If the organization I work at actually transmits that to my house, I promise to come to work.

You are not going to work; you are going to play, like a child. For you, it’s the source of fulfillment and pleasure. You remember that as a child, you would climb and you had such energy to waste?

Oren: Yeah.

Here it will be the same. What is the difference between work and a game? When you are enjoying every moment, it’s a game. When you enjoy only the end, maybe what you receive, that’s called work.

Oren: And what does this change depend on?

We need to have you enjoy your job during the time that you are working, so that it will become a game and it will become good.

Oren: And how will the organization give me this feeling?

It will give you this feeling through an attitude of sharing, participation, the mutual participation of everyone together, and that we will do this together.

Oren: Can I ask you something?

Yes.

Oren: Say I work at such a place, such an organization, and it really does seem good. Say you’ve invested in me, and you’ve even made me cake.

No, we gave you ____.

Oren: No, that’s later, not first thing in the morning. So, let’s say that people are working with good will. Sometimes something negative breaks out.

Good. Let’s do a workshop right there on the spot. Nobody keeps it inside.

Oren: What workshop?

Well, on that very same subject.

Oren: For example, I get angry because Nitzah has not told me that last month she worked on the development of a kind of special component that I had just wasted two weeks on and wasn’t able to solve the same problem that she solved a month ago, but didn’t tell anyone about it. But now I’ve discovered this, and I am very, very angry. I am really angry. So what, what will we do with this workshop?

So everybody participates, not just you and her. And everybody needs to discuss why it happened this way. I wasted these two weeks at a job doing work that she finished a month ago. So we are not connected correctly, so we need to do a workshop just like this every week, let’s say for just half an hour, where each one will tell what he is up to, what he is doing. And then everybody will know what the other is doing and each one needs to tell and then you know what each person is up to. It’s just a lack of connection, and even if she could tell you, she didn’t, so it’s not just a lack of connection, but even a desire not to be connected. And so we correct that. What’s the problem?

Oren: Hold on. So now you’ve added this tool for me to share information in the organization. Let’s talk for a moment about this anger that I experience. Let’s not run away from the problem. The organization invested, played music at my home, made me coffee, but suddenly something happened. There is a conflict, and we sat down for this workshop. What do I do now in this workshop?

You have to; because we’ve made this pact between us that you will not hold your anger in. So that’s a law that you are not allowed. You are not allowed to hold it in.

Oren: Why, why, why?

Are we friends or not? You are not allowed. By doing that, you are putting a stick in the wheel.

Oren: What if I am only angry at her on the inside.

Yeah, by that you harm everyone.

Oren: Well, I can’t swallow it.

We don’t care about your ulcer. We care about the health of the connection between all of us, that’s why you are not allowed to do this. You have to be in mutual responsibility with everyone and we make a pact. You are obliged and you signed this deal where we must all be very, very true, and take out everything in his heart until all of our hearts connect.

Oren: So let’s just talk about this point. Each person has to say everything that’s in their heart, so that I don’t feel angry. And so I’ve told her. I’ve told… I don’t say to her directly, you think I should tell her directly? Or should I do it through the other people?

No, no, no, no, you should do it together.

Oren: Ok, so we all sat together.

Right, it’s for everyone to learn from. It will make the peace stronger.

Oren: What are the stages?

You go to the person who organizes the workshops and you tell him your problem. You tell him what happened and ask what we should be done.

Oren: And then everybody talks about it.

No, Nitzah is the last to talk. Everybody asks is it right, is it wrong, and how should we overcome it on behalf of the organization, and our connection? Until it reaches Nitzah, everything is organized.

Oren: It’s like the problem became everybody’s problem.

It already was everybody’s problem. Even though you’re only two, because it has to do with our connection, then it’s become everybody’s problem.

Oren: Will she be hurt by this situation?

No. We corrected it and only want to remember this moment.

Oren: Okay, our time is up. Thank you very, very much everyone. Don’t go home with hurt feelings; we are going to be together. Until next time, all the best and good bye.