Part 3:

The 15th of Av: the Day of Love - Selected Excerpts from the Sources. #8

Reading number 8 (00:20): “There is a prayer…”

1. S. (01:02) Why should he feel the love of his friend? He has to feel love towards his friend.

R. I don't know, I'm not an expert on grammar on language but there's a prayer for it that the Creator will help him by making him feel the love of his friend and make his friend close to his heart. There's a prayer to the Creator to help us feel how the friends love me and how I would love them.

S. That's what I have to ask for? That the friends will love me? 

R. Yes.

S. It's not egoistic?

R. Not egoistic. We're not talking about an egoistic level.

S. So what?

R. But unless I feel their love it will be difficult for me to be in love towards them. 

S. So what's the thing here? What turns this request to be correct? Everyone's asking to be loved and Rabash writes in a few places that it's not that the friends should love me but that I should love the friends.

R. Correct.

S. So what is he explaining here?

R. He is explaining that in order to love the others, to some extent, you need to feel that they love you. There has to be something mutual here. If there won't be some contact, some spark, even the most external kind then it's impossible for anything to develop here, for the beginning of love to develop here.

S. Why is this concealed?

R. So that a person will start from zero. He needs to disclose the power of love from the concealment.

S. Why doesn't a person want to feel the love of friends towards him?

R. That the friends love him?

S. Why doesn't a person want to feel that?

R. It's because of his ego. It's likely that he is afraid that he will then have to repay them.

S. So when he asked the Creator to help him feel that the friends love him…

R. Yes…

S. What is he lacking? What has to open up towards them so that he will allow them to love him?

R. He needs to open up his heart to them and then he will feel how they do wish to fill his heart and he has to open up his heart.

. 

S. What's that action of opening his heart? What does he have to do?

R. He has to come closer to them. He has to come closer.

S. Does he have to be ready to pay them back to give back to them that's why he's not opening himself?

R. He's not capable of doing it yet. 

2. S. (04:48) Love of friends towards me, is that something that exists to begin with only I don't feel it because I have to start working in concealment like you said? Is that all right approach or is that something wrong.?

R. Okay, we can get confused for a thousand years, we need to read what is written and try to resemble it. Otherwise it's going to be like a dog chasing his tail. We're going to just run in circles and that's it. So there's a prayer for it that the Creator will help him by making him feel the love of his friend and make his friend feel close to his heart. That is the prayer, I will have to activate it, like it or not is not important and whether I feel close to it or far it is not important. I need to come to it, for the Creator to help me for me to feel the friends, feel their hearts, just like I feel myself and my heart.

Reading number 9 (06:12) twice: “ We must remember that…”

3. S. (8:10) Why isn't it enough to be busy in loving the friends but also to hate himself?

R. We have two forces, love and hate and I need to aim both of them towards the connection with the other; Therefore, to the extent that I care to be connected in love with the other, I need to be concerned about self hate.

S. Love doesn't cover the hatred?

R. No but they have two different sources, two different goals. 

4. S. (9:25) I see on myself that there's concern, that there's support, that there's faith that I will reach the friends, the day will come and I'll be close to them. What does it mean to feel the internal love of the group that's concealed for me?

R. Feel in love?

S. Yes, what's concealed from me, the true one.

R. I would say this is something we had from our mother if you remember, there's such a state where a mother's love, it's eternal. It cannot disappear, it cannot change, this is called eternal love. 

S. Is there a limit to the depth of this love?

R. No, here's no limit to such love. Only one who is capable of rising above this love to Hochma and Keter, these are…

5. S. (11:10) Annulling himself and hating himself. What should we hate in ourselves?

R. The ego the Creator created. That we are all inside this egoistic will to receive.

6. S. (11:29) How to show the friends that I'm working in self annulment?

R. In practice .That I'm willing to serve them, I'm willing to serve them even though it is at my expense, seemingly. 

7. S. (12:05) He writes how it caused everyone to be part of the intention of his friend, we always talk about the friend's deficiencies and the desire. What does it mean, his intentions?

R. His intention to bestow we connect amongst ourselves with the intention to bestow to one another and from that to the Creator.

S. So what does it mean that one is integrated in his friend’s intention. 

R. Each one should be integrated in his friend to be still by that we come to one intention, one bestowal.

S. I can depict that the friend has a desire, he wants the same goal, the quality of bestowal, Creator, adhesion, there's a deficiency in the friend. I see it in his actions, his language but about the intention that is something that is concealed. How can I have the intention of the friend?

R. Through actions, prayers, desires, connections, in them we begin to feel the intention of the friend.

S. And eventually our connection is in the intentions, not the desire?

R. The desire. The direction of the desire is called intention. 

8. S. (13:34 )I don't know if it's me but sometimes when we read about love and these writings there's no feeling it's like it's tasteless even though love is such a strong force. Yesterday there was a YH. It was so warm we felt it but when you read the text it's, well, is that me or is it like that?

R. It's like that.

S. So what do you do?

R. It's like that, there's a time for this, a time for that we have to keep going and these periods, they change and they begin new states. Okay?

Reading number 10 (14:30): “Through the wearing out of…”

9. S. (17:05) How do you discover this? This loving concern that the friends have towards me?

R. Try to relate to them with love and you will feel if they also love you.

S. I'm trying. I know that they're concerned about me in love and thought but it doesn't let me go about this concern about myself and he emphasizes that you have discovered how they're concerned about you and then you are released of self-concern. So how do I change this knowledge and revelation to an actual feeling?

R. It's an actual feeling.

S. How do I make this happen?

R. Together with the friends and in prayer to the Creator but the important thing is together with the friends.

S. What to ask them? To talk to them? To ask?

R. To feel that everyone cares about everyone else and then you'll enter into this bubble of fire, and that's how you'll advance.

S. While you're speaking I'm trying to think about how our meetings today will be different. What are we going to do differently because everything you said is what happens in our meetings so what can we add? Every ten does the same thing, what to add?

R. I don't know. If you all feel that you have nothing to add then you need to pray. If you feel that you've reached the end of the revelation of love between you then where's the Creator inside of it? Where's the entire world Kli, where is the Shechina? 

10. S. (19:17) What is the wearing of the hearts?

R. The wearing of the heart? Mechanically we understand what is the wearing out of the heart, how do we come to such a wearing out until sparks will come out and warmth and excitement will rise? I don't know what to tell you, that's how they used to make fire back in the day. Thousands of years ago. This is called the wearing out of the hearts.

S. Can we say that every time we try to love a friend and make efforts above the rejection that's the wearing?

R. If we strain to be connected to one another, even if it's to connect above the sparks that come out of the wearing out of the stony heart, by that we come to a fire that burns in our hearts and we discover the power of the Creator towards us.

11. S. (21:05) I heard you say to activate a prayer. We say that everything is attained by prayer. How does prayer change reality? 

R. The fact that you can attain everything by prayer, those are pretty words, which can make you ignore everything or put aside everything else, that there's nothing more than prayer and that's it but nevertheless we need to feel. The whole thing is about feeling. What does it mean that we connect and in this mutual feeling, we've reached a cry to the Creator? What then? Who are we then? 

12. S. (22:15) Does prayer change the inner forces or the external forces?

R. Prayer is the most internal thing, the most internal. 

13. S. (22:35) Usually what he describes here happens every time with one friend, how do you do it like he wrote in the previous excerpt? How to be incorporated from the ten forces, how to be incorporated from all the forces of the ten that each one will be incorporated? 

R. When everyone would want to incorporate with everyone else we will feel ourselves all of us incorporated together inside of it we will discover this concept of one, the one Creator, the connection and more than that, it's the source of all of reality, it is one.

S. How in this incorporation when I'm included in the ten forces of the friends, how do we become one from that?

R. When you wish to connect until there are no differences between you and you feel that you are in one center, in one power that is working on you that you want only one thing which is for love to erase all the differences and compress you together into one state.

S.So incorporation in one another actually brings us to a state of one?

R. Yes. There you find the Creator who is waiting for you until you demand Him from the bottom of your individual hearts. 

14. S. (24:27) Why does he use this term the wearing of the heart or the friction between the hearts? He could say that me and the friends are looking…

R. No, it's not by looking in a certain direction. You are rubbing the hearts together, wearing them out, wearing out the hearts and then in each and every one there's something not quite like in the other and from that you get the these fire sparks and that's what you're after to attain these fiery sparks, from revelation of the changes that are still taking place in you and from that you discover the fire of love which cannot be revealed unless it's on top of the opposition, conflict between them. Each one is really on fire and then only when the two of them, the two stoney hearts they can connect with the fire of love. This is the main work, as much as we can to come to it, to begin to work between us like with rocks where each one is tough, hardened but is ready, is willing to extract from himself these sparks of love with the friends, with their help and through his effort he is ready. Imagine that all these rocks are passing over you and you are extracting or bringing out these sparks of love. 

Reading number 11 (27:44) twice: “Each gift that he brings…”

15. S. (30:28) The gifts we give or what we receive, they have to be revealed?

R. Not necessarily.

S. So how can I appreciate what I'm getting from them, the gift?

R. If you can open it up and reveal it, go ahead, do it and there's a chance that they will also reveal it. It is written he who gives a gift to his friend must inform him but also concealed giving is good.

S. We learned from all the writings that even when I get a gift I have to increase the greatness of the friend in order to enjoy this gift so I have some value in what I'm receiving, so it's all like working in some kind of a combination, I don't even know how to put it in words but it's something in a gift that it's the main thing that I always need to work on the gift that I'm either giving or receiving. 

R. That's a piece of your heart that you're giving.

16. S. (31:50) What's the difference between the wearing of the hearts that we feel between us and the flame that rises from the sparks?

R. This all depends on our understanding, where we are, what we are doing; Meaning, it can be a great flame or a tiny spark but it all depends on the person, the depth of his heart from which he extracts or elicits the contact with the other.