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Question: How can one best visualize the concept of bestowal?

Answer: Only by making efforts in this direction. How else can one clarify what bestowal is? Invest effort in it; show diligence. In short, do this from the moment you hear that such a thing as bestowal exists.

Know that within this bestowal are the Creator, the concept of the “neighbor” (who is outside you), the group, study, and the upper worlds—everything you can imagine, except your ego. It is not something small. On the contrary, it is everything outside you.

Your ability to relate to and feel something as though it exists outside you is called bestowal. Begin clarifying this. Then, at least, you will not be mistaken. When “Creator” is mentioned, it means the quality of bestowal. If you invest precisely this meaning into the words each time, it will immediately become clear how much you are lying to yourself and to what extent you imagine Him incorrectly.

Instead of any concept, term, or action that you want to discuss in relation to the Creator, you can use the word “bestowal.” You say, “Great, mighty, and awesome,” this is how the concept of bestowal appears opposite the desire to receive.

This is the essence of Rosh Hashanah (“Head of the Year”): to clarify this concept and place it at the head of the path.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/11/26, Rabash, “The Rosh Hashanah Prayer”

Question: For whom do I ask for the light that reforms and returns to the source? Is it for my friends, who supposedly are already corrected, or for myself?

Answer: A person asks from a deep inner need, from a desire. The desire must be for the society. After all, if we are talking about attaining spirituality, then in spirituality there is no personal calculation with anyone.

There is no such thing as “I” that exists in spirituality. I am the collective of souls into which I am included. And therefore a person cannot remain there alone, detached from others.

So for what kind of life does one ask for strength? The life force is for the common body, the one soul. Therefore a person should ask for strength in order to bestow to this body. One’s entire life is determined by how much they give to the common system.

Therefore, even if one’s prayer is caused by a desire to receive strength, it is a prayer that one be given the strength to bestow to the common body of the soul. And therefore, whether a person asks for everyone or asks for oneself, it is one and the same prayer.

When we speak about there being a “prayer of one” and a “prayer of many,” this is still an uncorrected prayer. There is no other prayer except the “prayer of many,” a prayer for the society.

But as long as a person is not yet in a completely corrected state, one partially asks for oneself and partially for the society. According to this, a person is corrected by having one’s direction adjusted so that one feels where it is better and where it is worse, and in this way a person is brought to the correct prayer.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/24/10, The Zohar

From above, we are given a point in the heart, a certain aspiration toward spirituality. I do not yet know what spirituality is, but I want something. Therefore, I gradually begin to clarify it, study, participate in the group’s work, and listen to the teacher. Then it becomes clearer to me that spirituality is the upper force.

I begin to understand that all my strength and desires come from there and I start to feel my dependence on it. At the same time, however, I feel that when I think about the Creator rather than myself, I lose strength because my desire to receive does not support this.

Or, conversely, I feel that my entire self, my whole desire to receive, has become a slave in the hands of the upper force. I pass through various stages of sensation and begin to see, in different forms, how I am connected to the higher force: sometimes I want it and sometimes I do not. I feel that perhaps it would be better if it did not exist; I feel dependent on it and unable to control myself because of it. I want to rule over it, fear it, and sense that it separates me from my desire to receive—my ego.

I already begin to hate my desire to receive and think about how to please the Creator because I am told this is how it should be: if He is pleased, I will be pleased, and if I do not think about Him, things will be bad. I begin to experience all kinds of relationships between us.

I am told that a group is necessary because without one I cannot accurately determine my attitude toward the Creator. I am told that my attitude toward Him must be expressed in the same way as toward a stranger. If I love someone, even someone who is my biggest hater, without any material reason, not because I have found qualities in him that appeal to my ego, but because I regard such an attitude toward another as elevated and great, this is called the quality of the Creator.

I have neither taste nor benefit in this. It could be any stranger toward whom I feel no inclination or particular attitude. Yet I am told that this is the only way to test whether I truly have an attitude toward the Creator, because this is His quality, this is how He relates to us.

Does this mean that He loves us? When I relate this way to a stranger, I do not feel that it comes from the heart, so it is not called love. Therefore, I remain confused and do not know what to do. I have no preparation for the measure of love I am being told about.

In other words, a person gradually clarifies their entire connection, attitude, dependence, or, conversely, independence concerning the Creator. This is our work. In most states and degrees a person passes through, they do not feel that they are being built in relation to the Creator. It seems to them that everything is happening in relation to the friends, the group, and various concepts that explain what spirituality is. In essence, however, they are being formed in relation to the Creator, who is concealed behind all of it.

A person clarifies all this. We say that they are in a special state on Rosh Hashanah, an important point that determines their entire subsequent path. At that point, they crown the Creator as sovereign over everything that happens and decisively determine that they depend on Him.

The desire to receive, having reached this conclusion through the states it has previously undergone—that the Creator is the king of the entire earth, meaning that He rules over all desires—places the Creator at the head of the path it intends to follow. In this way, it has already entered the state of Rosh Hashanah (head of the year).
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/11/26, Rabash, “The Rosh Hashanah Prayer”|

Our sages (RASHI, Tavo 3 (Deuteronomy 26:16), in Yitro 13:10) said about the verse, “This day the Lord your God commands you to do these statutes and ordinances. You shall be careful to do them with all your heart and with all your soul,” “Each day, they will be as new in your eyes, as though you received them today from Mt. Sinai, as though on this day you were commanded them” (Rabash “What Is, ‘Every Day They Will Be as New in Your Eyes,’ in the Work?”).

What does it mean that each day, they will be as new in your eyes? The desire to receive is not new. It has existed in the same form from the beginning of creation and forever. Rather, they will be as new in your eyes means that the renewal relates only to the intention for the sake of bestowal.

With regard to intention, a person is always either in an ascent or in a descent and is constantly making clarifications. It is precisely by the intention that we evaluate a person.

Initially, a person has no intention at all. He simply becomes accustomed to performing actions that he was taught through his upbringing, whether religious or secular. This is called performing learned actions or behaving as a trained person.

Obviously, there is no intention here. Habit simply becomes second nature, both for those who received a religious upbringing and for those who received a secular one. This has nothing to do with what we call intention, because there is still nothing here of the one we call a human.

Anyone can be raised in any manner, and that is how he will remain. There is not yet a man here. A man is one who, through free choice, forms within himself the image of Adam, one who is similar to the Creator. In this process, there is first the intention for one’s own sake (Lo Lishma), and afterward for the sake of the Creator (Lishma).

Lo Lishma includes all of a person’s efforts from the moment he begins working with the point in the heart and receives some awakening toward coming closer to the Creator. Although this may take many years, ten or fifteen, depending on the quantity and, above all, the quality of his efforts, even if he has worked for all those years while experiencing descents and ascents, sometimes moving away and sometimes drawing closer, passing through various states, then, when he is rewarded with the correct intention for the sake of the Creator, all his efforts throughout all the reincarnations (since he may not be able to complete everything in a single reincarnation) become included in the intention for the sake of bestowal that he has acquired and enter his work forever.

Everything else that he received through his upbringing does not belong to the degree of a man and is not taken into account. And so, he advances with regard to intention, constantly adding to it, while passing through descents and ascents.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/8/26, Rabash, “What Is, ‘Every Day They Will Be as New in Your Eyes,’ in the Work?”

The thing that is the most important is not to forget about the Creator for even a moment. How can we be rewarded with this? By exerting each time more fiercely and with more power and might. By this we are rewarded with the quality of “remembering” (Rabash, “The Rosh Hashanah Prayer”).

Efforts made toward a goal give us awareness of its importance. If I invest myself in something, it becomes important to me; and if it is important, I do not forget it.

Whatever I want to make significant in my eyes, I must simply think about constantly. Effort itself evokes awareness of importance, and importance compels me to keep paying attention to it and not forget it.

Question: So, the advice is not to forget, but to remember all the time?

Answer: A mother naturally does not forget her child. Once she has given birth to him, the matter is settled. As it is said, from the moment she becomes pregnant, all her thoughts are already about him: first about the fetus and then about the child. This is nature; it is what matters most to her.

How can I make the spiritual, the Creator, acquire the same degree of importance that exists in animal nature? How can I keep Him constantly in the focus of my attention so that I always see Him as the cause of everything happening to me and the goal I wish to attain?

What else do I have besides this? All my strength, desires, and actions come from there, and I am their result. I need to add only awareness of importance and my own attention. Then, if I add what I must and relate to it in this way, it means that I “make the Creator reign” over me. And if I truly elevate Him above myself, nothing prevents me from working with my own forces for His sake.

There are stages of advancement here. At first, I simply prefer Him and think about Him because it benefits me and makes sense to me. Then come other stages, when this is not beneficial to me and does not serve my ego, from which I have already distancing myself and I recognize that it and I are not the same. Yet what becomes precious to me is that this is important, that it is spiritual.

This continues until I acquire such a degree of awareness regarding this importance and force that I pay no attention to myself, but only to His benefit. We do not yet understand what this means. It is above the qualities of Binah.

Thus, everything depends on attention to the Creator. How can this be attained? For now, through effort.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/11/26, Rabash, “The Rosh Hashanah Prayer”

Talks about the Steps of the Ladder, Part 239

Why Will the Body’s Resistance Be Removed If It Is Actually a Necessary Part of the Process?

The body’s resistance does not disappear simply by saying that everything is for the best. By saying this, we are, as it were, making a restriction. We do not want to receive only the body. Instead, we want to receive it together with the Creator’s qualities that are positioned opposite it, so that we, the Creator, and His entire method exist together. Then we derive benefit from that state.

We attain nothing by sinking solely into resistance and negative qualities when nothing stands opposite them. Sometimes it seems that great suffering brings results, but this is untrue. There is no commandment to suffer even for a single second. Suffering is a problem of the body, of the Klipot (shells/peels), which constantly confuse and mislead us into thinking that through suffering we manage to attain something.

The statement, “It is a great Mitzva to be in joy,” is absolutely true. The moment we can move into joy, we should not think that we have not yet felt enough suffering, that we must still sink deeper into suffering, into the depths of the evil inclination, into the depths of creation. Nothing is attained from the evil inclination or from suffering.

One should rejoice and not judge joy as frivolity. If, in the face of suffering, we immediately move into joy, that is not frivolity. In any case, suffering will soon return, and we will emerge from it once again, and so it goes, over and over. “And from Zion…,” i.e., from coming out of suffering, “shall come forth Torah.” Otherwise, we bring about destruction.

Question: Suppose I look at myself from the outside. But if everything has already been determined and planned in advance, do I have the power to change anything? What else do I have besides understanding the situation?

Answer: Your conclusion that it will not help you to look at yourself from the outside, that the game is lost in advance, and that you are just an observer, indicates that this thought comes from impressions of your own Kli (vessel).

If you ever go beyond this point of observation and see yourself as if from the side of the Creator, then you will feel yourself rising above the nature of creation, and this will give you what is called spiritual life.

What is spiritual life? It is that you are no longer under the authority of the Kli itself and its sensations; you are no longer completely immersed in them. What do restriction (Tzimtzum) and intention for the sake of bestowal give us? First of all, freedom from the reactions of the Kli itself.

What does it mean to “cross the Machsom“? It means to rise above the desire to receive, above one’s own Kli, and as if to look at it from the side of the Creator. It is possible to say “as if,” but this gives me an objective vision that cannot be expressed in words. Only then will you be able to say who you are, because you acquire a certain part that is outside of creation itself.

Despite the fact that you are not capable of getting out of your nature, the desire to receive, you receive a thought similar to the thought of the Creator, and from this thought, from the intention for the sake of bestowal, you look at creation, at yourself.

This seems impossible to us. After all, we say, “How can I completely get out of myself, enter someone else’s mind, and look at myself through his body, through his eyes? Is that even possible?”

But this is exactly what you are given. You acquire the quality of the Creator, and as if through His eyes, His thought, through Him, you look at yourself. This is called acquiring another nature. What other nature exists besides ours? Only the nature of the Creator.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/27/26, Rabash, “What Is the Work of Man, in the Work that Is Attributed to the Creator?”

We must not harbor illusions regarding our relationship with the Creator, specifically the illusion that He sends a person something in response to a particular action a person makes.

It is not a matter of my doing something for Him and His responding to me through an action. It is a matter of my intention toward Him: what I think about Him and what my intention is directed toward. Our fundamental problem is that we descend from intention to action. This gives rise to all the confusion, a person thinks that if they act toward the Creator in a certain way, then the Creator is obliged to respond in a specific manner.

We are not discussing the actions themselves; we do not truly understand what we are doing. Lately I often hear people making various calculations, as though the Creator treats us in a certain way because we did this or that. It seems that everyone has become prophets.

This cannot be calculated, because we are not familiar with the part of creation where all the actions originate, actions that later descend to us. Yet suddenly we reason as though we know the entire system of the world of Atzilut, where our MAN is connected with what we will receive in response as MAD.

People begin constructing a completely fantastic, unrestrained system of imagined relationships. They think they can already determine precisely why the Creator does one thing or another. But we don’t have the slightest understanding of this, because the souls are connected to one another in a way that cannot be calculated.

Everyone is in his own special process, not necessarily connected specifically with his current state. The structure of every soul is such that it is impossible to know which events are necessary to reveal and correct each stage of that soul’s development.

In other words, we cannot judge actions at all. This is hidden from us and has its root in the Rosh of the world of Atzilut. Therefore, until we attain such a level and have clear attainment, we will not know this.

All that remains for us is to clarify the intention. This is what we must engage in constantly, so that our intentions truly appear new in our eyes each time.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/8/26, Rabash, “What Is, ‘Every Day They Will Be as New in Your Eyes,’ in the Work?”

Question: Does forming an intention affect habits in the material world?

Answer: In the material world, there should be as few different habits as possible. Habit should apply only to the study schedule.

Or one can say the opposite. A habit is beneficial where you act like an animal and establish proper frameworks for yourself in order to advance: getting up at night, studying, going to work, returning from work, continuing your studies, or engaging in dissemination, going home to sleep, and repeating all this again.

By structuring your lives this way, you form a habit. It truly becomes a second nature; a person gradually becomes accustomed to it. But even having this habit, if you do not work with intention, you devolve to the inanimate level.

Only through intention can something be added. Regarding actions in this world, the rule “neither add nor subtract” applies here, and all additions occur with the help of the screen (Masach).

Question: So everything that does not concern intention should become a habit?

Answer: There is no need to worry about matters that have no intention or about any actions performed without it. Intention itself will compel a person to act. In spirituality, intention is the action.

That is why, in books and stories, Kabbalists are often portrayed as simply sitting in a corner, doing nothing, and working with intention. This is how people imagine Kabbalists.

In reality, all the work of a Kabbalist is internal. But even in inner work, we distinguish between action and intention.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/8/26, Rabash, “What Is, ‘Every Day They Will Be as New in Your Eyes,’ in the Work?”

Question: What is the difference between our method and the method of yoga? They do something similar, don’t they?

Answer: We develop egoism. We develop it! When we speak about restrictions and acquiring the force of bestowal, we are speaking about developing the desire to receive.

Development touches on a question that was already asked: “If instead of receiving pleasure, I want to calm myself, does that mean I am using an even greater desire to receive?” That is correct. Here is the example of a fool who suffers and weeps about his suffering, while a more developed person seeks a remedy.

We see this in our lives. One person works hard from morning to evening; another comes to the same workplace, watches the first person working, and asks himself: “Will I work like this from morning to evening too?” and searches for a solution. Then he sits down, drinks coffee, smokes, and the machine does the work for him. The desire to receive develops this, and from its development we arrive at the desire to bestow.

In contrast, various other methods are based on suppressing the desire to receive, on using it less and less. Kabbalah, on the contrary, teaches us to use it more and more. You may do anything you wish with your animal qualities, but only the light that returns to the source will help you emerge from this state. No restriction will help here. The fact is that the more you develop, the greater desires you are given.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/27/26, Rabash, “What Is the Work of Man, in the Work that Is Attributed to the Creator?”

Question: If the peak of the development of egoism, the desire to receive, consists of a person ultimately wanting to escape from himself, what difference does it make whether he escapes in the middle of the process or only at the peak of development?

Answer: You have a certain Kli (vessel), and as it develops to its full capacity, you must experience all the pleasures of this world, sensing both the suffering they cause you and simultaneously how much you would want to enjoy them if you could.

But instead of this, you prefer to calm these sufferings, stifle them, and stop feeling them. Every person, within his Kli, must arrive at a definition of this final state. If this sensation does not exist, he will not be able to develop further. This is merely the complete realization of the smallest Reshimo.

Comment: Suppose a person understands the process, agrees with it, and says: The ultimate goal is to eventually escape the suffering.

My Response: But now you cannot decide that you want to escape the suffering because you do not yet want this.

You have no way to trigger a “leap in the path” or accelerate your development through any external, technical means. You can rely only on inner self-discovery, and you can accelerate it only through the environment. Apart from the group you are in, everything else belongs to an inanimate level that is incapable of accelerating your development.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/27/26, Rabash, “What Is the Work of Man, in the Work that Is Attributed to the Creator?”

Talks about the Steps of the Ladder, Part 238

How Should We Relate to the Various States?

First, we accept the state that comes, observe it, and want to examine it within ourselves, without judging whether it has done us good or bad. We examine it from within the recognition that everything the Creator does, He does for good. We give it a place from the knowledge that it has come to correct us, even if it is so difficult that “a sharp sword rests upon my neck.” We must not despair or drown in self-pity. Everything is a correction.

Naturally, it is not always easy to accept states in such a way. But after we have related to them in this manner once, there will be moments when we feel incapable, filled with resistance and a desire for destruction, and then, upon second thought, we will begin to relate to the state correctly. The resistance will disappear the moment we remember that the state is intended to correct us, and from there we must move on to the third state, “There is none else besides Him.” From within that state, through the sorrow and pain, we will begin to discover “There is none else besides Him,” and will immediately arrive at sweetness, i.e., at the sweetening of the judgments.

Question: How can we achieve such harmony in human society? In other words, can we simply live as though there were no other people? Can we begin living this way?

Answer: This is precisely what Kabbalah proposes. It is when the others do not interfere with you but, on the contrary, help you, and when you feel that being among them gives you a great deal of space!

You are in an enormous crowd, with a million people around you, yet you feel as though you are completely free. No one is pressing against you; there are no disturbing shouts, no intrusive influences, nothing. Everything is calm and good, as though you were in an open field.

Question: Is this what you call “a world without man, yet with man”?

Answer: Yes. We can create such a world, despite the fact that there are so many of us.

The main thing is not to interfere with nature. That is what all of this is about. Do not interfere; do not intrude upon nature. Study it and try to achieve integrality with it. When you achieve such unity with nature, you will see how, in reality, everything is simple and benevolent.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 9/2/26

Question: Can aggression be directed toward peaceful ends? Everyone understands how it works for non-peaceful ends, but toward peaceful purposes?

Answer: Peaceful purposes mean against oneself.

Question: So right now, all aggression is directed from within oneself outward? And you say, “This vector needs to be turned toward oneself”?

Answer: Little by little, gradually, turn it somehow toward oneself.

Question: So, it turns out that aggression exists for this very purpose, so that I can gradually turn it toward myself?

Answer: Yes.

Question: So, it turns out that I am attacking this “I” of mine that asserts itself?

Answer: Your “I” is hatred toward others, the desire to rule over others. And if you transform it into the opposite, understanding that it is impossible to remain in such a quality, then you instead acquire the quality of bestowal and love, the spiritual quality.

Question: So aggression toward oneself is good? The bad thing—aggression toward others—turns into aggression toward oneself, and this is good? And this is what it exists for?

Answer: Yes. And then you truly begin to relate to yourself as an enemy.

Question: And this is good?

Answer: And this is good, of course.

Comment: Humanity needs to make such an effort.

My Response: It will make the effort; it has nowhere to go. There will be such suffering that it will wish for this.

Question: There are enemies of humanity all around. Everyone feels that there are only enemies around. And you say, “The enemies are inside you.” This formula is clear to me. But can it actually enter a person’s mind and heart?

Answer: And why couldn’t others?

Question: No, can it enter? Can a person suddenly turn the weapon around that has been aimed and built?

Answer: But you understand, don’t you?

Comment: Yes, I understand.

My Response: Then others will understand too.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 8/3/26

Question: What does “the Torah is barren” mean?

Answer: If the Creator created the Torah as a spice for the desire to receive, but it is not corrected with the help of the Torah, then it produces no results.

Such a state is called “the barrenness of the Torah.” All the results produced by the Torah are first of all correction and afterward fulfillment.

This is precisely what The Book of Zohar states: those who do not wish to engage in the wisdom of Kabbalah make the Torah barren. They simply do not use the Torah as a force that corrects the desire to receive.

The Torah is both fulfillments and holy names that are revealed in the intention for the sake of bestowal. But we are not speaking about that yet, since these are already more advanced degrees. Initially, when you first encounter the true Torah, it acts precisely as a force of correction.

If you do not accept it in this form, then all your engagement around it is not called Torah.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/30/26, Rabash, “What Is ‘He Who Is Without Sons,’ in the Work?”

Talks about the Steps of the Ladder, Part 237

Why Do New Discernments Give Us a Familiar Feeling?

New discernments are seemingly new, but when we examine the way they are expressed, we see that the words are the same familiar words. In the wisdom of Kabbalah, we learn that all of reality consists of only the original ten Sefirot. There is nothing beyond that. The worlds and the souls are within them. Everything exists in the ten Sefirot. The difference lies in the way these new discernments cause us to feel those ten Sefirot, which is different and deeper. The depth of their perception consists of 125 degrees.

We are still before degree zero of attainment. Also, even before we begin to attain the ten Sefirot, before the barrier, there are steps and discernments. However, in principle, the picture is the same, as we learn in Kabbalah, that all the worlds are built according to the same pattern: five Partzufim and ten Sefirot. That is, everything is the same, and we repeat the same thing. A three- or four-year-old child learning to read the Torah and a Kabbalist such as Rabbi Shimon read the same Torah, but each understands different layers of it.

What does a child reading the Torah say to his or her mother? “Mom, look, Abraham wanted to kill Isaac.” That is how he understood the Torah. A Kabbalist, however, knows the correction that the Torah describes in the case of Abraham and Isaac, a correction entirely above this world, and attains it, sees it through spiritual forces, through an eternal vision. Yet the expression is in the same letters and words.

When we begin to study, we discover that we see new things in the study material each time. Suppose students are sitting in a lesson and reading an article with their Kabbalist teacher. Afterward, one of the students asks the teacher about the meaning of the text. How does the Kabbalist know something beyond what they know? It is because the Kabbalist sees additional depths in the article that are hidden from the students’ eyes. The Kabbalist cannot convey to the student what the Kabbalist feels, but explains what he sees in different words.

For the students, the article is revealed only to a certain depth. For the Kabbalist, it reveals deeper layers, and there are those to whom nothing will be revealed. They will read the article and there will be no response in their hearts because they still have no spiritual vessel. Among the students, such a vessel is already beginning to form. So what is the difference between the student and the Kabbalist? The difference is that when the Kabbalist explains something to the student, he gives him a little illumination from the depth in which he himself resides, bringing it up to the level where the student is. In other words, the Kabbalist adds additional light of his own to the surrounding light that the student awakens during the study.

A group can also add light. In a group, each person understands according to a certain depth, greater than that of a person who does not study the wisdom of Kabbalah. Therefore, when they study together with the intention of sharing everything with each other, all of their surrounding lights unite and act upon everyone. From this, we can understand what a powerful amplifier of spiritual force the group is.

It does not matter that there are differences in knowledge among the people in the group, nor does it matter if there is a Kabbalist among them and everyone else knows less than the Kabbalist. The differences stem from the fact that each person has a unique character and a unique root of the soul. Yet even the Kabbalist benefits from this integration and receives an addition from it. There are things that the Kabbalist will be unable to understand without certain friends in the group, each of whom brings something uniquely their own.

Question: What kind of marital union can keep a family from falling apart? What are the roles of the woman and the man in such a union?

Answer: There must be proper upbringing. No matter what happens, throughout your life, thousands of different situations and adventures may occur with each of you, but you know that you have a family, and it is your obligation to support them and stand by them. As long as you live, you must take care of them. That is first and foremost. As for feelings, well… What feelings? You cannot build anything on feelings alone.

Comment: You have said more than once that a man looks for his mother in a woman.

My Response: That is true. A man looks for something of his mother in a woman. And if he finds it in her, that ensures his attachment to her.

Question: So, if a woman understands that he is looking for his mother, does that make the union work?

Answer: Yes. That is why it is said in the Torah that our forefathers would bring their brides into, say, their mother’s tent. And the brides would live there. And after the bride had lived with her mother-in-law for a while, the man would marry her.

In other words, she learned from his mother how to take care of him, what to do with him, what he likes and does not like, how his mother cooks, how she does everything, and so on. She watched everything and learned.

Comment: So she learned to be a mother to her husband. That is certainly a paradox.

My Response: How is that a paradox?

Comment: She came there not to learn how to be a wife but to learn how to be his mother.

My Response: You cannot imagine how attached a man becomes to a woman then. If she reminds him of his mother, he will look at her like a child does! He will constantly catch his mother in her.

Question: And he will never want to get divorced?

Answer: Never! How could he get divorced? Leave his mother?

Question: So, you do not abandon your mother?

Answer: That is correct.

Comment: And what about the phrase a wife says: “Go to your mommy! I am not your mother! Let her bake your pies for you!”

My Response: You see what kind of arguments people make! “I am not your mother!” That is the problem.

Comment: And there must be a high percentage of divorces because she does not take on this role of being his mother.

My Response: She must understand that the only way to keep him, to make him hers, is this way! There is no other way. It is written in the Torah, written in the Bible, simply in black and white.

Question: So, maybe you are telling us the secret behind all divorces right now, and we do not need any psychologists?

Answer: This is the secret of clear-cut relationships. Until the end of his life, a man will see his mother in his wife and will never run away from her.

Question: And what is the man’s role in the family, then?

Answer: If he is attached to her, what more is needed?

Question: So, this is her security? Is that what she seeks in him?

Answer: Yes. Nothing else. He will do everything to make her happy. He will give her compliments every day.

Question: And he will earn money and work?

Answer: He will do everything, of course. I know this for sure. This is human nature.

Question: What does a woman need from a man? Is it this sense of security?

Answer: First and foremost, attention. Attention to her, to the children, to the home. So, once you get married, that is it! The bride goes to live with her mother-in-law and learns from her all about her son’s weaknesses. And she learns how to deal with him as a woman. Here and there, she knows how to say or do something that reminds him of his mother. He falls for it immediately, instantly, and forever.

Comment: And he will do everything she wants.

My Response: Yes. He needs this. A man does not give birth; he remains a child, and that is what wins him over.

Question: So he remains a child? All the time? Even when he is 70 or 80 years old?

Answer: It doesn’t matter!

Comment: People will not exactly be outraged, but they will ask: “What about the man? It is all about the woman, the woman.”

My Response: The man must provide everything the woman requires. Nothing more is needed. That is in the material sense. But spiritually, everything is different—the opposite.

In other words, the man’s spiritual development is not the family’s concern. It is not. It is a privilege, a prerogative. I don’t know how to put it. It is solely his personal choice. In this respect, he is the man and the head of the family. But this is regarding spiritual development. As for the material side—the woman.

In spiritual development, the man is in charge; in material development, the woman is in charge.

Question: If the man is in charge of spiritual development, then is the woman’s role to give him the opportunity to work on his soul?

Answer: Yes, of course.

Comment: And then he will also provide her with everything she needs.

My Response: Twice as much!
[359840]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 7/16/26

Question: Does the transition from the Klipa (impurity) to holiness occur through suffering?

Answer: There are two possibilities for moving from the Klipa to holiness. One is through blows, but this is a very slow path. You can remain inside the Klipa, say, as in this world, suffering through several life cycles, until your “measure becomes full,” and you begin to think about the meaning of life, and eventually start searching. As it is written: “What reason does not accomplish, time will.”

But there is also another possibility: let reason do it, not time. What does “reason” mean? It is a force of attraction from the other side, when it is not suffering that pushes you from the Klipa toward holiness, but you begin to search and ask, “Perhaps there is something good in holiness?”

Then you happen upon some group, a few friends, who show you pleasures in other things, in a different way, in a different form. In this way, you neutralize the negative development.

Question: But if I am in the Klipa, then are all my desires also in the Klipa?

Answer: Your desires are in the Klipa, while your reason, let us say, is already in holiness. You need to increase your reason, and strengthen your connection with holiness to such an extent that the image you create in your mind can withstand the pleasures that the Klipa seems to be offering you. And then you will see that it is truly worthwhile.

You must build such images in your mind that they can withstand the attraction of the Klipa. This depends on the individual, on his development.
[361171]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/28/26, Rabash, “What Is the Work of Man, in the Work that Is Attributed to the Creator?”

Our problem is that we consider our states good or bad and measure ascents and descents by our mood, physical well-being, and how energetic we are in our work. This has nothing to do with the true state.

The intention for the sake of bestowal or reception, its sharpness and clarity, awareness of the evil contained in it, and the ability or inability to perform good are not measured by our sensations but by the intention itself, by how deeply we clarify it. According to this, we can measure our advancement.

Perhaps, in one’s clarifications, a person reveals that he is entirely in the state of receiving for himself, that there is nothing in him for the sake of bestowal, and that he is therefore far from the Creator. In this, he is indeed far from the Creator, but he is close to Him in that he is advancing in clarifying the intention and in the process of correction.

Therefore, our sensation determines nothing on the ladder of degrees by which we ascend, because this must be considered only according to the depth of the clarification of the intention. How good or bad a person’s sensations are during these clarifications does not matter; the deeper they are, the more he advances.

Therefore, we should strive only to renew our intention—that is, constantly examine what our attitude toward the Creator is. We must constantly examine this mutual connection, this system of relationships, and deepen it as much as possible.
[361504]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/8/26, Rabash, “What Is, ‘Every Day They Will Be as New in Your Eyes,’ in the Work?”

Question: What would you call the connection that unites people into a group?

Answer: A connection in which each person feels that without the others he cannot attain correction, fulfillment, spirituality, or connection with the Creator is what is called a group.

Everyone may think this for purely egoistic reasons: “I need them, otherwise I will die.” And nothing more. This is how it happens in any other society.

It is not by chance that they are called friends, a group. It is not by chance that some other name was not invented for this.

In our world too, if we want to succeed in something, we must unite, trust one another, and so on. Our group differs from others only in its goal.
[361499]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/2/26, Rabash, “What Is ‘The Concealed Things Belong to the Lord, and the Revealed Things Belong to Us,’ in the Work?”

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